(Closed) Wish he didn’t buy the ring.

posted 6 years ago in Waiting
Post # 3
Member
2006 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: April 2012

it will get better!

i know its hard to hear, but once you get engaged, you’ll look back and laugh at how crazy you were.  I get really obsessive too (read: i made about 11 collages of rings I loved, each with 10-20 including prices and links) but fortunately I didn’t know when Fiance bought the ring or which he chose. Once it got super close I started looking into venues, to help take my mind off the ring (maybe not the best advice…lol)

there will ALWAYS be something to look forward to.

the wedding.

the newlywed stage.

starting a family.

raising that family.

retiring.

etc.

it will get better just try to focus on getting through each day without going crazy lol

Post # 4
Member
4046 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

can you find something else to channel your energy? cooking, decorating, fixing your house, learn italian so you can vacation there, etc?

Post # 5
Member
6892 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: March 2012

I echo PPs – find something else to possibly channel that “planner” attitude into. If it’s something productive, awesome. If not, still better than obsessing over something you don’t have control over right? πŸ™‚

Interestingly, when I started to feel like I was “waiting” and knew he had the ring I started looking at venues, photographers, colors, dresses and stuff like that. I was honestly a better bride as far as planning PRE-engagement. Now I hate wedding planning. Lol.

Post # 7
Member
5371 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: June 2014 - Ontario, Canada β™₯ EDD- April 2016

I totally understand where you’re coming from! I thought that when he got the ring I would be able to stop focusing on the engagement, but the opposite ended up happening. I just tried to focus on loosely planning rather than talking to my Fiance about the ring and pestering him. Now that I’m engaged I feel a lot more relaxed about planning and am less interested in it than I was before πŸ™ ugh, haha funny how that works.

Post # 8
Member
3720 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

I’m in that boat too, except a little worse (in terms of making me crazy). My boyfriend, the ring, and I are going on vacation in 5 days for two weeks. I know I’ll get it there and have known for 2 months it’ll be happening sometimebthere. Has made me totally crazy. I totally get how your feeling

I cope with my craziness by working out a ton (want to look good in Facebook photos that people will stalk to see the ring). I’m going over and above at work to channel nervously energy too. I’m also trying to make an effort to be a better partner– trying things my SO loves and encouraging him to spend time with his friends

<p

Post # 9
Member
1468 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2016

Lol @ “first world problems, i know.”

Indeed this is a good problem to have compared to others. I can’t wait to have this problem. And the great thing is, my SO absolutely CANNOT keep a secret or wait to give a present he’s excited about, so I know he wouldn’t hold on to the ring for long before proposing.

I never really got why guys hold on to the ring for weeks and months waiting for the perfect time. I mean, if you can’t plan something in the reasonable near future, I say just do it!

Hope you dont have to wait too long!

Post # 10
Member
1130 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

I’m in a similar boat. We picked out the ring together from Brilliant Earth and I know it’s being made and on its way soon. We’re also going to France next month and I know he wants to do it there. I personally don’t know how I am going to make it that long. We are visiting my parents this week and I know he’s getting their blessing. Impossible not to think about it *constantly*. It’s so much more anxiety inducing when you know it’s coming, but honestly, knowing I’m going to be with my best friend forever makes it all worth the wait.

Post # 11
Member
74 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

I’m in the same boat. I had to think to myself…ok I know he’s going to propose, and I’m not just folding his laundray for fun, lol πŸ˜‰  I’m not good with surprises or waiting either, but he wants it to be special. I’m sure it will be planned out to be a lot nicer than if he just said “heres the ring…so do ya?” thats probably what hes trying to avoid, I k now thats my guys thoughts. 

hope to hear good news on your end soon, Take care πŸ™‚

Post # 11
Member
74 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

I’m in the same boat. I had to think to myself…ok I know he’s going to propose, and I’m not just folding his laundray for fun, lol πŸ˜‰  I’m not good with surprises or waiting either, but he wants it to be special. I’m sure it will be planned out to be a lot nicer than if he just said “heres the ring…so do ya?” thats probably what hes trying to avoid, I k now thats my guys thoughts. 

hope to hear good news on your end soon, Take care πŸ™‚

Post # 12
Member
74 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

I’m in the same boat. I had to think to myself…ok I know he’s going to propose, and I’m not just folding his laundray for fun, lol πŸ˜‰  I’m not good with surprises or waiting either, but he wants it to be special. I’m sure it will be planned out to be a lot nicer than if he just said “heres the ring…so do ya?” thats probably what hes trying to avoid, I k now thats my guys thoughts. 

hope to hear good news on your end soon, Take care πŸ™‚

Post # 13
Member
812 posts
Busy bee

I know what you mean, you’re defo not alone. I have a two year wait to even get engaged and believe me it’s on my mind aaaaaaaaaaallllllllllllll the time to the point I think my SO feels pressure at times to get us to that stage lol.

You just need to refocus like you said – I’ve been making lists of stuff to do and working slowly through them, everything from buying wellies to taking up a nightschool class. Whyy don’t you do the same? Think about how you want to look when you walk down the aisle and start working towards it πŸ™‚

The topic ‘Wish he didn’t buy the ring.’ is closed to new replies.

Find Amazing Vendors