Post # 1
There is a woman I work with that has for some reason or another has completely attached herself to me and I am in desperate need of suggestions on how to stop this. I am a friendly person, however my job has announced major layoffs (like hundreds of people) and many are being let let go every day. I purposely don’t talk to other people I work with because at the end of the day, it’s me over you and my money comes first, sorry. I know that sounds awful but I’m here for a paycheck and not to make friends.
She is one of those people who becomes fixated on people and then suffocates them. She is very negative and gossipy and every single day she will come to my desk during break times andsit (on top of my desk btw) and gossips loudly. On break time, I like to just relax and unwind, you know… Because it’s my break.
I have tried to dodge her because she has a VERY bad reputation for being a gossip and honestly I’m too damn old to be caught up in that mess. I’ve tried to tell her I prefer quiet breaks in a very causal conversation, dropping hints by frequently sitting in the breakroom (she will follow me) and then once I even sat in my car and she came outside and tapped on my window!!!!
I don’t want to be associated with someone like her. I am sorry if that sounds bad but she just isn’t a good person. She has recently been written up for emailing jokes about other coworkers to people around the building (what are you like 12?!) Other than just telling her straight up and causing me work drama, any ideas on how to get rid of this problem? Please help I don’t want to be a witch.
Post # 2
“once I even sat in my car and she came outside and tapped on my window!!!!”
That is actually kind of hilarious, not for you but it’s just so ridiculous. I don’t think you’re being mean, she sounds like the mean one. Usually when I hear people start gossiping and telling me stuff I don’t want to know I just politely say, “I’m sorry but I don’t want to talk about X, that’s none of my business”. What I really mean is that it’s none of THEIR business but most of them seem to take the hint.
Post # 3
I have zero problem telling people that I don’t enjoy making fun of other people and don’t like to hang out with people who do. The next time she says something mean, I’d call her out on it. If that’s what she likes to do and can’t get that from you, she’ll move on.
Post # 4
I have a coworker like that, she sits directly across from me. She’s well known to be the office gossip and is constantly trying to start drama. I’m polite and fairly new to the office, so she talks to me a lot. She tries to tell me about drama and make comments like “why can’t everyone just get along” to which I always respond “I don’t notice any drama, I stay out of it”. I hoped that answer would politely get the message across that I don’t want to hear it, but no such luck. I can’t wait to see some more ideas… I don’t want to spend my work day listening to gossip. Telling her outright isn’t an option, she gossips about how rude those people are and makes even more problems.
Post # 5
Sheesh, she does sound like a pain. I would jus straight up tell her you like to be alone on your breaks and you don’t wish to engage in office gossip as you don’t want to put yourself in the firing line for lay offs.
Post # 6
I died when I got to the “tapped on the window” part! OMG! I don’t know, I think I’d just tell her straight up you want to break ALONE. No hints, just come out and say it. What a weird, awkward position for you to be put in.
Post # 7
what i do in that type of situation is put on headphones and say “im sorry,i have some personal stuff to catch up with over my lunchbreak. Catch you later”. And then just ignore her.
Post # 8
I think at this point no amount of “dropping hints” are going to work on her because she is definitely not picking up whatever “go away” vibes you are giving her LOL.
I think at this point you can just tell her the truth and that you just arent that into her. 🙂
Post # 9
this woman sounds brutal! i would stop engaging in convo as much as you can. just act distracted or busy when she comes by, tell her you’re working on something, or make up an excuse to not talk to her. i have a coworker who comes by to chat and can’t take the hint when i’m busy – so i just “yeah” her while looking at my computer screen. it’s probably rude, but she doesn’t get the hint.
she seems like a big mouth, so i would avoid being super blunt with her because she seems like the type to spread stories or talk about you if you have a confrontation.
Post # 10
lol! If it were anyone else, I’d find it absolutely hilarious! It kind of reminds of that move “What about Bob?”. If except no Billy Crystal, just one very annoying coworker haha.
and I wish I was that brave. I am just going to suck it up and say it because my productivity has suffered a little since she will sit and talk even after break time has surpassed.
I feel your pain!!! And I am in the same boat, I never even noticed all the drama until she started blabbing. And the real kicker, she’s 15 years older than I am!
lol! It’s not me, it’s you. I’m just not that into you.
Post # 11
You’d be amazed how well it works! The next time she says something mean about someone else just look her dead in the eye and say “Wow, that’s a really mean thing to say.” She’ll trip over herself backtracking. Or maybe try to laugh it off. But if she understands that you don’t approve of her being mean, she’ll probably just stop talking to you.
Post # 14
annoying coworkers are terrible. Mine makes noises at her desk that make me cringe… think clearing her nose, loud slurping, loud chew/smacking her lip… I have to get up and walk away and am totally grossed out by it, but am not sure how to say anything without coming off as a “B”
Post # 15
mother of God…. I think I’d gag. I can ignore banter. Bodily function noises? Nope.