Post # 17
Member
198 posts
Blushing bee
And watch if I say something to that wench watch her get offended and loud with me. I’m going to try to get a fitting on my bday since it’s the end of the month. If she makes a remark I will put her in her place and write a REALLY bad review and not recommend her to anyone.
Post # 18
Member
198 posts
Blushing bee
@mwitter80: OMG! That’s mortifying. FI’s dad is like that when he gets drunk. He mumbled something about how I look like I can eat, and Fiance didn’t take kindly to that. Which is why he is trying to not drink anything at the wedding.
Yeah it’s a struggle for me to keep my weight down. I know how to do it, but when everyone is looking for you to do everything, the alcohol and food are comfort lol! I’ve stopped and have been eating better and am doing the 30 day shred thingy. Ugh. I’m SO pissed. I wish I had a faster mouth!
Post # 19
Member
429 posts
Helper bee
Some people are just plain rude! I’m SO sorry she said that to you. It was completely out of line! Sending major long-distance hugs your way!!! I’m sure you’ll look beautiful, and as PP poster said, she’ll always be a jerk!
Post # 20
Member
198 posts
Blushing bee
And the first time I met up with her she was so sweet, and this angry customer came out of nowhere screaming at her. I should have taken that as a big ol’ clue!
Post # 21
Member
726 posts
Busy bee
@LadyLuna711: I’m an islander, and I do feel like a lot of times my family will just point stuff out, and it’s in the same way that it’s acceptable to say “your hair has gotten long” or “you’re so tall now” and isn’t meant to be offensive in any way. It’s just an observation. And in American culture, it’s seen as a judgmental thing to comment on someone’s weight. But within my family (really the only ties I have to my culture) comments on weight have never really come off as “wow you’re hideous now that your weight has changed”. Which, unfortunately, is what I think a lot of people feel is being said to them (in America) when anyone comments on their weight (usually gain, since weight loss is perceived as a “good” thing). So, for what it’s worth, old habits die hard and unless she clearly had a disgusted look on her face, she probably wasn’t trying to be malicious. But if it bothers you (which it clearly does) then say something to her so she doesn’t do it again!
Post # 22
Member
138 posts
Blushing bee
Oh my goodness. How did you not slap her? What a cunt.
Post # 23
Member
198 posts
Blushing bee
@jumpthegun: I know exactly what you mean. No she didn’t say it in a “malicious” way, she was looking me up and down and asked me “You got BIG? no?” All LOUD, like I was supposed to say “Hell yeah!!”. LOL. I understand it both ways, but this is a MONTH before my wedding. You work in a BRIDAL shop. She’s been doing this for years so it’s not like she has no clue. She has Jewish women, Latino women, all races I’ve seen in there. And I’m SURE she’s said it to someone down the line who got pissed.
I tried to rationalize it like maybe she was saying it out of concern because of the fittings, but no, it was in front of other people, and she could have said it more tactfully. And like you said if I lost weight she wouldn’t have said anything. Believe me, I will say something to her when I see her next time.
Post # 24
Member
3148 posts
Sugar bee
@LadyLuna711: O.O Although I have a millon come back lines running through my head right now for her… I would’ve probably been the same as you and stunned at what she said. Just know you’re the better person!
Post # 25
Member
3363 posts
Sugar bee
Brush it off! Some people tend to “THINK OUT LOUD!”
You just gotta learn good comebacks!
Post # 26
Member
605 posts
Busy bee
@Miss Smurf: I almost lost my lunch from laughing so hard! lol!!!!
Post # 27
Member
198 posts
Blushing bee
@CupCakeMeg: Well if I’m paying her she needs to learn how to keep her mouth shut.
Post # 28
Member
871 posts
Busy bee
Devil’s advocate: Perhaps she did not realize that pointing out loudly and publicly that a woman (a bride on top of that) has gained is rude and MAYBE she was concerned genuinely that you needed another fitting.
As another poster said if it was not said in a malicious tone then it is cultural and she most likely was just thinking she gained weight I had better do another fitting to be sure all is well.
Also doesn’t matter how long a person has been in a country, culture sticks! My family and my fiance’s family are still very xenophobic ppl regardless of their jobs or length of time in the country. One more than one occassion my Future Father-In-Law has said “You know you can’t trust a cake” and a person who falls into that category who he likes could be standing there and he’d still say it.
So smile, be beautiful and remember other than possibly wanting to do another fitting for you SHE has forgotten all this, YOU are focusing on it and that is more telling in terms of your opinion than that of hers.
Post # 29
Member
198 posts
Blushing bee
@EncoreBridetoBe: Well of course she’s not thinking about it because she’s not getting married. And because of my height and stress, I was already worried about my weight. But I *get* it, but then again I don’t. If you know what I mean. Oh and thanks for your post 🙂
Post # 30
Member
2738 posts
Sugar bee
@LadyLuna711: *THIS*!! I’m West African and this happens a lot with my folks. I try not to take it to heart and Fiance has told me countless times that America has made me too sensitive. I can see someone from my culture saying this. OTOH, I went for a dress fitting (a couple years ago) with a Russian lady and she straight out told me ‘What’s going on bR? Your hips and stomach are getting big’…uh…I dunno?
Post # 31
Member
256 posts
Helper bee
Wow, people’s disregard for others feelings never ceases to amaze me. I am so sorry that happened to you. I am sure that you will look AMAZING in your dress. I would email the owner and tell her about your experience.