(Closed) Wondering whether to invite household "employee"

posted 5 years ago in Etiquette
  • poll: Should I invite her?
    Yes : (98 votes)
    95 %
    No : (0 votes)
    Need more info to decide : (1 votes)
    1 %
    Ice cream! : (4 votes)
    4 %
  • Post # 3
    1109 posts
    Bumble bee

    @geekspice:  I would invite her, she is a family friend. Let her decide if she is comfortable going alone.


    Post # 4
    151 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: October 2013

    I think you should invite her – it would probably mean so much to her! She may or may not decide to attend (due to the things you mentioned above), but at least the gesture was made.

    Post # 5
    2555 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: April 2013

    Definitely invite her. She can go with a friend, a son or daughter?, a neighbor, or just hang out with your family

    Post # 6
    7211 posts
    Busy Beekeeper
    • Wedding: October 2015

    @geekspice:  Invite her, give her a +1 (she must have friends!) and put her at a table where she might have something to talk about. I’m sure knowing you and being around you for so long she must be excited you’re getting married. I would def want her there if I were you.

    Post # 7
    6256 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: March 2014

    You should invite her. It sounds like you’re even close enough that it might be perceived as a bit of a slight if you DON’T invite her.

    Post # 8
    547 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: July 2013

    I voted for ice cream, but I agree with PPs–invite her!

    Post # 9
    5001 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: September 2013

    I have a similar situation and we are inviting her! We have known her for 15+ years and since I don’t live with my parents, and haven’t for 8 years, she doesn’t seem like an employee to me. I agree with the PP that she will probably be really upset if you don’t invite her!

    Post # 10
    1252 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: June 2012

    Yes, I think you absolutely should invite her. You said it yourself: she is part of your family. I understand that you are concerned about her being without a SO, but that’s okay at wedddings, I wouldn’t think too much of it. 

    Post # 11
    7680 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper
    • Wedding: November 1999

    @geekspice:  Invite her and sit her at the same table as your mom.

    Post # 12
    11271 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: April 2012

    i think that she would be honoured to receive an invite to your wedding.  would you consider offering her a +1 to invite a close friend so that she is not alone?

    Post # 13
    2499 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: August 2013

    If she is important to you and your family then invite her. I am inviting the person who clemuted my parents old house because we became close. 

    Post # 14
    9954 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper
    • Wedding: December 2012

    Etiquette Snob here.

    You guys obviously have a long term relationship… it would be a slight if you didn’t invite her.

    Infact, I’d hand her her Wedding Invite in person (all addressed and all, just not stamped)… and tell her how happy it would make you if she was there on your big day.

    AND I’d give her a plus one… and let her know she can bring whomever she wishes (a case where writing AND GUEST on the outer envelope is very acceptable).  Then she can bring a Date, a friend, a relative… whomever she wants.

    Classy way to handle this.

    Hope this helps,

    PS… With a Plus One, you don’t have to worry so much where to sit her (especially if everyone she knows is gonna be busy… plus if you are having a formal wedding set up… Parent’s Table etc… then you won’t have to stress about having to place “a single” there)


    Post # 15
    1478 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: September 2013 - Creek club at ion, SC

    The answer is obvious so i voted ice cream

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