- 5 years ago
So i decided to have it out with SO after recently feeling very low about the whole will he wont he propose this year?
I aksed him the other night if he had a 5 year plan..he replied yes but its a secret and after 3 years of going out with him and 2 years living with him i was a bit hurt that he wasnt including me in his planning 🙁 since thursday night iv not really been to friendly with him, i had tried to make a point i was upset, to which he just said yes of course he had a plan the same he had 3 years ago..to move me to his part of the world, get engaged, married and have kids, All i could say was that 3 years on from his original plan, the only thing that had happened was me moving to live with him from overseas.
so today after waking up agian in a low mood i got upset and finally let it all out to him. i explained how sad i was that i felt i couldnt talk to him about serious stuff and that he wasnt taking US seriously either. i felt he was too imature and i was gonna be too old to have kids etc by the time he grows up (he is 27 and im 31..) I had originally agreed with him i didnt want kids after i turned 34…
iv been quite broody lately tho i never let on to him…
anyway we had a heart to heart finally and he said i was the one for him and he loved me and of course saw us getting married and living forever together and having a family etc..all the stuff i needed to hear..
but when i asked that if he wanted all that then why would he not want to get engaged?? i said was he holding out for something better? His reply was simply that he never said that he didnt want to get engaged and of course he wasnt holding out for something better! …and laughed and then avoided going into detail…
i cant help but still fell confused by his answer..to me, if u are serious about someone and dont want anyone else, and you KNOW it would mean the world to her to at least get angaged…expecially after she moved 1000miles to live with you..he of course u would propose, right?
he has no rush in him, he even said when i told him i was worried having kids wouldnt happen if we left it too late and i didnt mean to pressure him but said i felt sad coz im older than him and wish id been the younger one.
he said yes he wants kids too but can see it likely we just wont get chance….and that felt like a punch in the gut 🙁 hed rather miss out on having a child rathet than hurry himself along a bit??
im sorry to rant but he is asleep and i cant as it all goign round in my head so im here again hoping for some advise or comfort from all u others in the same or similar boat..
i dont understand why he cant tell me why he doesnt want to propose…yet wants a life with me?
what should i do? i feel if i drop the subject then he will just carry on pleasing himself.. 🙁