- 5 years ago
- Wedding: January 2012
I’m going to vomit, ladies. This evening, I was happily working in my ceramic studio, making awesome platters and chattering to Darling Husband about my birthday party tomorrow. I asked him to go empty my water bucket for me and fill it with fresh water. A moment later, I heard him call. “Um, GEM? There are things living in your slop bin.”
A slop bucket, for those of you who are unfamiliar with the ceramic process, is a massive container full of sloppy, gooshy, slimy clay. It’s where I throw out unfired pieces I don’t like and clay that’s too wet to work. I collect it in there until it’s mostly full, and then I dump it all out and spread it thinly on a table so it can dry a bit. It eventually turns back into useable clay. In fact, that’s what I did just yesterday. I spent about an hour digging clay out of there and covered in clay slop all the way up to my shoulders.
I went in the room to ask Darling Husband what he was going on about, and he pointed them out to me: little half-inch-long red and white worms swimming in the couple inches of water at the top of the slop bin. I counted five, but I’m sure there are more.
I have no clue how they got there. I have never had worms in my clay before. EVER. And I used to keep my slop bins outside. I don’t know why they’re there or where they came from or what they want, but OH DEAR GOD THERE ARE WORMS IN MY CLAY. THE SAME CLAY I WAS SHOULDER-DEEP IN YESTERDAY.
I’ve been feeling squirming sensations on my skin ever since. Ugh. I’m sure they’re all over me. And they’re in my clay. I can’t touch my clay like this. I mean, they wouldn’t actually hurt the clay… They’re tiny, I’m sure just preparing the clay and then using it would kill them, and the resulting pots would be fired for eight hours at 2200 degrees Fahrenheit, so there wouldn’t even be any trace of them left on the final products… But guys, I CANNOT touch worm clay. Oh dear God. No worm clay. No worm clay. Ugh.
I’m okay with creepy crawlies. I can do cockroaches, spiders, centipedes, mice, bees, all of that. But non-earthworm worms??? HELL NO.
This is pretty much the worst news I could have ever gotten as a potter. Yes, worse than my entire studio exploding. Even worse than having both arms amputated below the elbows and never being able to work again. I HAVE WORM CLAY.
I know I wanted a birthday surprise, but this was SO not it.