Post # 17
Skip the registry and post nothing about gifts. Let the word spread you all want cash to help you build your future together. I wouldn’t wantto hear that you plan to use the money for student loans. Don’t turn your wedding into a fundraiser.
Post # 18
LMAO!!! I seriously cannot stop laughing!!
Post # 19
It’s not up to your wedding guests to help you pay off your student loans – there is no way to word this politely.
We used this wording and were given moneytary gifts as well as “boxed” ones:
Your presence at our wedding is the greatest gift of all. However, if you wish to honour us with a gift and need some ideas, we have registered a list with xxx.
Post # 20
I agree with prior posters. It will not go over well at all with many of your guests if you ask for cash to pay down your student loans — or for any other reason, however practical or admirable your goal may be.
Post # 21
Honestly if I saw a comment like that I’d be even more likely to bring a gift with no gift receipt. lol.
Don’t say anything about money. I have DH’s loans to pay off without thinking about my money going towards someone else’s.
Post # 22
I don’t know how it is elsewhere, but in the US it’s almost inevitable to have that kind of student loan debt. Especially being in the miltary, it would be impractical for many people to wait several years to get married because of that kind of debt. OP did not say they were relying on this money to pay that debt, but wanted to convey to guests that the money was going towards something practical/important.
Post # 23
Either way, my money doesn’t go towards someone else’s debt. I’m not the only person who found this offputting. If I choose to give a gift, I choose what to give. I don’t get solicited to pay off debts like a wedding is some kind of fundraiser. That’s just me. Perhaps other people find it perfectly acceptable.
Post # 24
@veganmelmel: I found your wording tactful, however, this is offensive to so many people. I think if most of your invitees are your peers they might find this presumptuous. I would probably rank this with honeymoon registries: ok for some, offensive to others.
Post # 25
There’s a phrase that keeps coming to mind when people worry this much about gifts: “You get what you get and you don’t get upset.”
Just dont register. No need for wording; honestly, I don’t want to fund my friends/family’s education at their wedding. Use it for whatever, but keep it private.
Post # 26
@veganmelmel: I would suggest simply not registering and when asked saying “We have to move around so much due to being in the military that we simply aren’t ready to accumulate a lot of life-long things now”. People will get that you want cash.
If you feel you need to put it on the website, I would use some form of what I’ve already posted. Saying that the money is to pay off debt is a little crass. People like to think of wedding gifts as setting you up for your new life, not paying for the life you’ve already had.
Post # 27
Thanks for your opinions, everyone. I have decided to remove the registry option on the website altogether and think most people will get it. In the end, I guess if I had to ask about the wording, that means I had doubts about it being OK in the first place lol 😉
Post # 29
Good call. If I saw that someone was asking help for debt repayment, this would be my thought process: 1. why are you having a wedding when you can’t afford it, 2. I have my own student debt I’m repaying.