- 4 years ago
- Wedding: January 2010
Working moms, have you had to compromise with your career to be a working parent? Did you feel it paid off in the end because it was better for your family? Were you able to continue with your career and still be a great mom/wife?
I feel like I’m coming to a crossroads at work and it’s making me very depressed and anxious. Before I had my DS, I was the annoying friend who LOVED their job. I loved my company, coworkers, the work I got to do, travel, entertaining clients, having amazing experiences. I was on top of the world.
I had my DS and came back to work when he was 18 weeks. Everything was great until about 2 months ago, when I was “promoted” to a new position which I did not seek out. It’s with an older-school (male) team who thinks that the show of a good employee is how late you stay at night. Travel turned from a few 2-3 night trips to multiple 5-7 night trips/year. (the last person who held this position would actually go for 2 weeks at a time, but I told them that was impossible for me, so they’re “compromising”). I’m already sick of the side-eye glances when I walk out the door at 5 to pick up my son, and the constant negotiations about my travel and time requested off. Don’t even get me started about when DS is sick and I have to call in.
Unfortunately, going back to my old position isn’t an option. Basically, they think I’ve outgrown my usefulness at that level, and they’d rather pay half my salary to a fresh face than have to pay double my salary to recruit someone for my new position. I even offered to take a pay cut to stay in that position, but because of politics, it just couldn’t be done.
So I’m at a crossroads. I sent out feelers to contacts about openings at other companies, but a working mom who needs to leave at 5 everyday and has limited travel availability is just not a hot commodity in my field. There is a position open at a much smaller company who does mostly local work, but it’s depressing me that I climbed so far to a position I love only to have to compromise and take a huge step backwards to accommodate being a mom.
I guess I’m just looking for other perspectives from mom’s who either stuck it out or made a career change and whether it worked out in the end. Sorry for the wall of text 🙁