Working opposite schedules – You and your SO

posted 1 year ago in Relationships
Post # 16
Member
5003 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: October 2018

FH and I work opposite schedules. I work 9-5 M-F and he works 7p-7a Friday – Sunday and alternating Thursdays. We both have ~40 minute commutes. 

It sucks. A lot. Especially since we don’t have any days off together. The last time we had a mutual day off was the 4th of July and the next will be our wedding. There are days that I see him for an entire 10 minutes – 5 in the morning and 5 in the evening. 

We spend a ton of time on the phone, since one of us is almost always driving while the other is at home. We also prioritize our time together over pretty much everything. If I want to see my girl friends, I see them on weekend mornings or after he leaves for work. He plays video games while I’m at work so that, when we’re both at home, we’re spending quality time together. 

Post # 17
Member
725 posts
Busy bee

I also think that it works because we dated for a few years before this was our schedule. I would imagine this would be way harder if the relationship is new without a solid foundation! 

Post # 18
Member
1192 posts
Bumble bee

My Fiance and I have been together for 3 years. Every since we started dating we have been on opposite shifts (he on 1st shift and I’m on 2nd shift). The only time we were on the same shift was for half a year when I was getting train in a new department on 1st shift. Luckily, he just got into a new department and we’ve been put on the same weekend (we work every other weekend at our jobs) so we get to see each other every other weekend when we have them off (unless one of us volunteer to work). Since our relationship has always been this way, we’ve gotten use to it. It was really nice when we were on the same shift and when we went back on opposite shifts it was kind of sad. But we started getting use to it again. Sometimes he’ll take a nap when he gets home so he’ll get to see me for couple of hours when I get home. We just find ways to make it work. I’m pretty independent, so being on opposite shifts don’t kill me as much as it does him (he’s more co-dependent). 

I’m also still going to school while working full time so sometimes we’ll go a week or so without seeing each other. it can be hard, but it can work:D

Post # 19
Member
214 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2018

I agree with a lot of the advice u have been given especially the doing chores during the week.

 

THe other thing we do is actually go out for dinner or for coffee and a walk so we focus on each other and not our phones or the TV.

My partner is s truck driver and we usually get Saturday morning/afternoons and Sunday together or Friday afternoon and Saturday together depending on his shift.

i will say we actually really value the time more now that it is more limited.

Post # 20
Member
2782 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

I know the phone reception is shitty, but does he have access to dependable wi-fi? You could Skype or some other similar option. The same goes for swapping an app out for texting.

My parents had opposite schedules for over 15yrs when I was growing up. My dad would call home every night during his dinner break, and he’d check in with my brother and me about our days, our hw, etc. He and my mom would then talk for like 15-30min. Weekends were about family stuff rather than chores. 

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