(Closed) Workmates and +1s

posted 4 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
Member
9567 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: May 2018

If they are engaged, married, cohabiting, etc they should get their partner invited also. The same +1 rules apply as for the rest of your guests. They are a social unit, even if you only know the workmates well, they still should be invited with their husband/wife/partner.

Post # 5
Member
7999 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: July 2013 - UK

Are you having a separate main meal and evening buffet/evening party, or is it all one long day? I ask because it does make a difference… people invited to the main meal usually get +1s, and people who only come for the evening festivities don’t have to have them, necessarily.

That said, if you really can’t do it, you will just have to explain to all of them, face to face, and give your reasons. I think people will be mroe understanding that way.

Post # 7
Member
9567 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: May 2018

@clairebbbear:  Just ask your workmates their partner’s name, and how to spell it.

Post # 8
Member
7999 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: July 2013 - UK

@clairebbbear:  Why don’t you speak to your work friends one on one and explain the situation? I’m sure they’re reasonable people and maybe they will help you out if you explain the space limitations.

Post # 9
Member
2641 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: March 2013

@Rachel631:  +1 I did that and a lot wanted to go solo. So only invited staff no plus ones. They had a ball 🙂

Post # 11
Member
7999 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: July 2013 - UK

@phoebephoebo:  The thing about giving people +1s is that many of the people at your wedding will never have met each other, and it’s nice to give them the security of a familiar face. But if they’re all work collegues then they know each other anyway, and will be able to hang out together. In that case, giving +1s is less important.

Also, I’ve been to these things as a +1 and I’m bored to death because FI and his work friends just hang out together and I don’t know anyone else there. FI refused to come to one of my work friends’ weddings as a +1 recently, because he suspected that all the guys from work would end up hanging out together, and he would feel lonely.

Post # 12
Member
3430 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

@Jacqui90:  +1:)

It’s either all or nothing as far as this type of situation goes. I would either invite your workmates and their SOs or not invite them at all. this is why I hate guest lists! LOL So hard to figure it all out! One reason I’m glad to be having a DW. I’d have to invite the world otherwise:)

Post # 14
Member
7999 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: July 2013 - UK

@clairebbbear:  Tricky, this. I can’t really comment because I don’t know your crowd. I also don’t know the norm in Australia, but the norm in England is to invite close friends and family only for the ceremony and main meal, and then to invite work friends etc for the evening party and buffet. Usually, we would invite all our work friends to the party, but we would expect those we don’t know very well not to come. If you’re not inviting some of the people from work, I would be very quiet in handing out those invitations!

Post # 16
Member
7999 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: July 2013 - UK

@clairebbbear:  I’d probably just invite everyone for desserts, coffee and dancing, if that’s an option?

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