(Closed) Workplace abuse: Should I stay or should I go

posted 6 years ago in Career
  • poll: Should I stay or should I go?
    Get out NOW! : (22 votes)
    39 %
    Grin and bear it until you find something else. : (34 votes)
    60 %
    Stick with the job indefinitely. : (1 votes)
    2 %
  • Post # 16
    2375 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: June 2014

    Do NOT quit until you have a new job. If you were in a high demand field with more jobs than applicants, that would be different. But given that it took you 2 months to get this job, it’s unlikely that you’d get another one right away. At some point in everyone’s professional life, you’ve got to suck it up, smile and deal.

    Also, something to keep in mind – she’s right about a couple things. She wanted emails done one way, you chose to do it your own way. She IS your boss, and if she wants them done individually, then do it. If you want respect, do things correctly first, and then bring up a possible better way to do it.

    Post # 19
    437 posts
    Helper bee

    sara_tiara:  +1. I won’t have the popular opinion. You did make a mistake. Unless she threw something at you, called you a nasty name, touched you… It’s sort of one of those things that I would suck up. Many bosses are like this, especially successful folks who tend to be those “Type A” personalities. They want it done right, and quickly. I’m a pretty tough cookie, though. So, this is something that I would not take super personally and/or dwell on. I’d apologize for, rectify the best way I knew how and move on. In the meantime, look for another job. I would not quit with no notice, though. Unless something horribly absurd happens. You described my former boss to a T. I still demanded respect in a professional manner, but was accountable for my actions, while still being dang good at my job. It was hard some days. I’d managed to get one of the most coveted position in the company within a couple of years. Most people couldn’t hack it, but the experience was invaluable to me and I knew it’d be worth it, at the time. After six years of experience, I figured I’d paid my dues and had a pretty competitive resume. It was only then that I left and found my “dream job”.

    I’ve had things happen/seen behavior (whether by owner or coworkers) that I did not approve of at any job. In order to be successful in life, you have to be able to adapt and work with an abundance of personalities. Running everytime something happens in the workplace that you dislike (again, aside from *real* abuse), is going to get you nowhere pretty quickly. 

    Post # 21
    1150 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: March 2015

    chickspartan:  I’m all for sticking things out but in this case, I’d just get out now. If your Fiance can support you in the meantime its not worth putting up with it.

    I know job hunting is a pain in the bum but better to find a new job you really do like sooner rather than trying to stick it out with this one and leaving eventually anyway!

    Post # 22
    437 posts
    Helper bee

    chickspartan:  Confronting you about a mistake is not verbal abuse. Again, if she called you a name, screamed at you, etc… That would be, but we don’t know the entire conversation. I’m not saying her behavior was right or justified, I’m simply saying that many employers will not walk on eggshells as to avoid hurting their employee’s feelings. Some business owners are more difficult than others… Not everyone is cut out for it, hence the turnover in your short time there. However, a job is not always supposed to be fun. Rewarding at times? Sure. However, a new job is full of trials and error. You said she was great, until you made a mistake.

    So, it doesn’t seem as though she’s been that horrible towards you, until an error was made. And, at that point, you debated quitting… Based solely on a single occurrence? Let’s also not forget that she gave you an opportunity when no one else would. 

    I agree that the way some business owners/managers treat their employees *is* quite sad. Especially some of the forms of harassment some bees endure. Likewise, there are many employees who think they are entitled to certain things, without them having to be earned. 

    Post # 23
    1245 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: August 2013

    I worked in an environment exactly like this for a year. A YEAR! Directly under the owner. I quit. No job, no prospects.  Best move I ever made. My health greatly improved.  Go. Don’t. Look. Back.

    Post # 24
    1246 posts
    Bumble bee

    chickspartan:  You described your situation in a way that makes it seem like this was the first time your were the object of her abuse. Until then, you liked (and still do like) the job.  Your post gives conflicting impressions. 

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