Post # 1
Ok so I have a few more months to go until my September wedding and everything for the most part seems to be taken care of and shockingly nobody has really pushed their ideas on the wedding planning.
Not so with the guest list however. My sister who is also the Maid/Matron of Honor, has pushed for certain friends (mutual friends of mine) to get invites. I was hesitant because I worry about how they are going to behave. They seem to think it is just a big party instead of a formal and traditional wedding which is definately going to be involving my church and pastor I have known for years and years. I am also worried that my extended family will be the same way. I love them and want them to be apart of things but how do I get them to refrain from being getting overly drunk and rowdy?
We are going to be serving beer and wine only as I am hoping that not having liquor available will help. But the more I think about it the more worried I become. My FI’s family is not the drunk and rowdy type and truthfully neither is my Mom’s side of the family (who is also very religious) which will also be there, is not that type either. Its mainly just some friends that I am afraid aren’t going to take things seriously and my Dad’s side of the family who just aren’t versed in social etiquette. Oh….And the venue we will be having the reception at frowns upon open drunkenness and has stated they will end the event if that should happen.
Am I worried for nothing? I want everyone to enjoy themselves, a nice dinner, dance, have a few drinks but not overdo it. I am probably overthinking this and worrying for nothing but its only a feeling that is increasing instead of going away.
Any advice would be great!
Post # 3
I am kinda worried about the same thing. I would (and did) just have an honest talk with the folks your concerned about, or heck, make your sister do it. She can be honest about the venue and the religouse relatives with out looking like a bridezilla. Maybe plan on having an after party at a local bar to appease the rowdy ones. 🙂
Oh, By The Way, were date twins!!!! lemme know how it goes for sure!
Post # 4
The venue, who will shut the event down for open drunkness, will stop serving to people who are out of control. So rest assured that it won’t be a huge problem. Stick with your no-hard-alcohol and let the bartender have carte blanche.
Post # 5
Thanks for the replies, we are having an afterparty actually at a local bar/restaurant so I am hoping those that want a huge party will reign themselves in until that time. And that was a great suggestion for having my sister do the honest talk some of them may just listen to her. LOL
Post # 6
Relax have fun try not to worry about it – You really can’t control how other people behave other than if they get out of control, they can be asked to leave. I just don’t think it’s worth it to ruin your day worrying about this type of thing.
Post # 7
Also, skip the cocktail hour (you could jsut serve light apps and lemonade/punch). You could even wait to open the bar until after dinner. Then people have less time to drink. And definately stick to just beer and wine. And let the bar tender know that you have no problem with them denying someone drinks if they’re too drunk.
Post # 8
Honey, what will be will be. You can’t un-invite them. Most will behave suitably, I am sure. You can worry all you want but it won’t change a thing so you might as well relax.
Post # 9
- Wedding: July 2012 - Baltimore Museum of Industry
The bartenders can limit the alcohol served. You can also ask them to stop serving during dinner, and to close the bar half an hour before your reception’s over.
Post # 10
I think most people tend to judge how much is okay to drink based on cues from other people around them — in other words, nobody wants to be the ONE guy that’s drunk in a room full of tastefully sober people. My wedding was a shit-show of drunkenness, but the guests were taking cues from the bride and her father who was footing the bill, and we were both loaded 😉
Definitely a bit of word of mouth to remind people what is and is not appropriate can’t hurt, though!
Post # 11
I was going to suggest that since she insisted on having them invited, that she gets to (soberly) babysit them to ensure that they don’t get too disrespectful. And as long as they’re not sneaking in their own liquor (this is already planned for my friend’s wedding – their family is not happy about the no liquor rule), the bartender should be able to handle it.
Post # 12
I agree that there isn’t much you can do about people’s choices except to limit their access to the crazy 🙂
That is why…
We are having a 3:30 wedding with a cocktail hour from 4 to 5 where only beer and wine will be served. We will add in three choices of hard liquor with mixers beginning after dinner. Our reception will go from 5 until 10:30 and I’m having “last call” and shutting down the bar at 9:30-9:45. We are having an after-party at the hotel lounge from 11-12, so if people want to be obnoxious, they can do it there. That’s my plan. Keeping fingers crossed that it works…