Post # 1
My Boyfriend or Best Friend and I are both graduating in May and I’m just starting to get nervous about the readjustment to me being around full time. Is anyone else having the same kinds of worries? I’m so excited to be with him full time again, but I’m nervous about the adjustment. We’ve been apart for the majority of 4 years (with my trips home during breaks and occasional visits to me at school), and I’m anxious about how we’ll adapt. I guess I’m also nervous because I consider myself to be a waiting bee too, and just want to be his wife and move forward to the next stage in our relationship.
Please tell me I’m not the only one…and let me know of any advice you other bees have for me. I did speak with him today about my concerns and he promises me we’ll work through anything when (and if ) it comes. I guess I just need some extra reassurance.
Post # 3
Not sure what you’re worrying about specifically? Most couples are together the majority of the time, but when they need a break they go do their own thing.
ETA: I kind of mis-read your original post. Try not to worry too much about the future (even though it’s hard not to). Pretty soon you’ll wonder how you ever lived apart for so long!
Post # 4
I totally understand!! I think its always a worry with LDRs that even though you know you love each other, its like “but will he like being around me all the time?”
You just have to remember that this going to be an adjustment for him too and so maybe you guys should sit down and talk about it. I know that reassurance from us that everything will be okay will only go so far, but hopefully he can talk you out of your worries.
Post # 5
Yes it is tough to adjust to being together at first. It’s something that people who aren’t in a LDR don’t really understand. With time, it will get easier to be together, you will develop a routine together. Are you planning on living together right away or have seperate places? If you have seperate places, it will be pretty similar to what you have now except that you see eachother more often.
Post # 6
I’m not necessarily worried about it.. but I have thought about it from time to time. Now, it’s easy for me to know that I’ll be back home in a few days and can do things “my way”: aka, have a clean house, go to sleep when I want to, go on WB without him asking me questions, etc. But when we get married there is no “I’m going home” escape… because we are home. Haha. I think it will be fine once we begin a routine and figure out how to have alone time when we want it. 🙂
Post # 7
We’ll be living separately for now, I might move in with him when he gets an apartment in NYC so he can go to grad school (NYU! he’s so smart!) more efficiently. I guess I’m definitely the most worried about what @Koala Bear: was saying about “will he like being around me all the time” and other silly things like that. Just readjusting to being around eachother a lot more frequently than just once a month, and just readjusting to eachother’s quirks. I know it’s going to take time and we’ll tackle anything (if anything) that comes our way. I guess I’m just trying to get a feel for what everyone else’s readjustment was like.
I was telling him today that I was worried about the adjustment to an “adult” relationship, where we’re working and making the motions to move in together and making serious steps towards engagement and those kinds of big steps. Let alone adjusting to being around eachother all the time.
I guess I’m just anxious about the unknown…
Post # 8
I hear you. I was there myself this past August. My boyfriend moved back up from Florida to New York after a bit more than 2 years apart. Suddenly he was 15 minutes away and I’m spending 2-3 nights a week over his house.
I was super excited and still nervous as hell.
To be honest, being we have so many hobbies and friends in common its been great. We have a great time hanging out together, like we first did as friends – and still managed a good time as a couple
The odd adjustment was we saw each other so rarely we often went out – fancy dinners, special activites etc. Now we’ve had to adjust to like just hanging around a house on a Saturday with maybe $20-40 to spend, but it’s definitely not a Florida theme park.
Getting used to ‘just chilling’ together took a while, but being cosy lounging around in pjs on a Saturday is awesome.