- 8 years ago
- Wedding: May 2011
Perhaps my title is a little overstated, but I am starting to get concerned….
I’m wondering if the Bridezilla concept is so overplayed and applied nowadays that the very act of making decisions (i.e. picking out Bridesmaid or Best Man dresses) automatically paints the bride as a “zilla”.
I am trying to be as accommodating as possible for my bridal party. I picked a neutral, classic Sophia dress from J. Crew (think most inexpensive style offered) with the idea that it could be used again, not tear and stain like the Davids Bridal Bridesmaid or Best Man dress I had to buy at almost the same price for a different wedding, or at the very least, easily sell it later. Initially I hoped for a “supersale” dress but, as we are all different sizes, I found this wasn’t going to work. I felt Bridesmaid or Best Man #1 was quite annoyed that she couldn’t get the 49$ dress. I scoured for coupons, emailing my BMs so they could get 20% off. I found a coupon for Bridesmaid or Best Man #1 after she ignored my initial emails with discount codes. She claimed I was buying the dress for her! By the grace of god I had an extra coupon mailed and when I gave it to Bridesmaid or Best Man #1, Bridesmaid or Best Man #2 made the snarky remark “well that coupon doesn’t make that much of a difference”. BM #5 never responded to a single email and then complained when she only had one day to get the sale. I learned 2 months later she hadn’t bought the dress. BM #3 also hadn’t bought the dress months later so I purchased it for her since there is now a 3 month waiting period for delivery.
BMs #1 and #2 also approached me and told me at the same time they wanted to dye their hair. One wanted to add purple streaks and highlights and remarked “is this going to piss you off, because if I was a bride it would piss me off”. I was a little shocked and said well, I think it will be okay? She then told our mutual stylist that I was “pretty pissed off” about this idea and asked our stylist to plan this purple hair streaking anyway.
Finally, I am trying to make sure I have plenty of little gifts for the BMs: hair accessories, jewelry, hair appointments, sashes, all taken care of by me. I’ve only ordered the hair accessories, and, again, picking styles that were drooled over initially by Bridesmaid or Best Man #2, I have received pretty luke warm responses over the items I purchased for them.
I don’t expect overly enthusiastic applause for my efforts, but I’m starting to feel bummed out and that any decisions I make from here on out will continue to be met with the same responses, which makes me think that anything I do will be seen as “zilla”. Help?