Worried what people think?

posted 1 year ago in Rings
Post # 16
Member
7351 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2016

If you are doing what you want (as in you love your SO and you love your ring), then focus on that and ignore what others say to or about you. Others’ opinions about you are none of your business or concern.

Post # 17
Member
1463 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2021 - Australia

I know the UK favours smaller rings, but I’m surprised they’d say anything since it’s not like what you bought is outrageously large.  Plus, as you say, you are both a bit older and more financially secure than when your friends bought their rings. Why not have something larger if you can afford it? It’s one of the benefits of marrying later! If anyone made any comments I’d probably say something to that effect – ‘well, we’re not young kids so we can afford something a little bigger.’

Plus as the other posters have said, once the initial look at the ring is done, no one is going to really say anything or have it in their minds any more.

Post # 18
Member
493 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2017 - Orange County, CA

Hi bee! Rock what you love and dont worry what anyone else is thinking! Your ring sounds like it’s going to be lovely and if you and your Fiance love it that’s what matters. My husband is 25 years older than me and we got married a few years ago. It’s your love that counts ❤️

Post # 19
Member
1535 posts
Bumble bee

Life is short…I wouldn’t worry about it. I got engaged when I was living in the UK and it was the 2nd marriage for my husband so he bought me a 2 carat solitaire. I was embarrassed by it in the beginning because my UK best friend got engaged the same month with a .20 antique ring.  They used to make comments but my love of jewelry started with that ring.  I think after a couple weeks, your own social circle will be used to it. I really worried for nothing because nobody ever said anything in the year’s after we were married. I think rings sizes are changing there. I would go with a simple solitaire or do an oversized halo or some gemstone side stones. Make it look a little more antique or family heirloom.

Post # 20
Member
1932 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2020

View original reply
@angelwaye:  Do you still have your 2 ct solitaire? Would love to see it!

Post # 21
Member
1667 posts
Bumble bee

If your friends are going to be catty about the size of your ring, tbh, you need new friends!

Mine is a small second-hand CZ ring because that was all we could afford.  Does it bother me that some of my friends have rocks about 5 times the size of mine?  Not at all.  I love my ring because it was chosen with love by the man I love.  And I assume they feel the same way about their rings.

If you and your fiance love it, that’s all that matters.  And people who can’t celebrate the symbol of the love between you are not the kind of people you need in your lives.

Post # 23
Member
2027 posts
Buzzing bee

That sounds gorgeous! 

Don’t worry about what others think- just be confident with your ring and be proud of it! People may comment on it but so what? just keep repeating how much you love it! You could be starting a new trend towards bigger rings in the UK lol and that’s not a bad thing! 

Post # 25
Member
1535 posts
Bumble bee

View original reply
@cc33ammy:  I changed it to a halo about 5 years after I saw this beautiful antique one in a window in Hatton Garden. I did sort of miss the solitaire at times so I made one in moissanite instead. 

Post # 27
Member
695 posts
Busy bee

Awww, I hope you are able to find joy in your ring. At the end of the day its yours and means something to you and your partner. If people are going to talk they are going to talk. Will that change anything? No, most likely they will comment on the size at first ( if they dare although how rude and uncomfortable) in which case you can just have a witty reply and then change the subject. No need to explain yourself or feel badly.  Enjoy your Bling! 

ps. Make sure you clean it really well before you see any family or friends just so it shines a little brighter. 

pss. What is the history of the smaller stone in the UK? I’m from the U.S and I’ve seen this comment around a few times. I’m curious..

Post # 29
Member
1059 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2018

My husband and I have a similar age gap to you and are in the UK. I don’t remember ANY of his male friends asking to even see my ring! They basically had zero interest! Certainly weren’t making any comments about it.

I did have the partner of a friend make a snarky comment about its size (it wasn’t clear to me if he was saying he thought it was too small or too big; it’s relatively big in total size, but it’s made up of a cluster of tiny stones). He’s a jerk anyway though, so whatever. He’s in his 20s.

Post # 30
Member
1131 posts
Bumble bee

I’m not one to care about others’ opinions of me. It’s none of my business. Once you stop caring, it’s liberating. Wear your ring proudly, which was given to you by a man you’re proud to call your fiance’! As a side note, I’ve had three relationships with men 15, 20, and 22 years older than me. I just have a thing for older guys, I guess. Distinguished men are so sexy. My fiance’ is only 9 years older, so he’s still a baby. Haha.  

I would love to see your ring! Marquise stones are my favorite, next to round. 

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