(Closed) Worries with the bridal party.

posted 8 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 3
Member
916 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2011

Yeah, it’s tough picking bridesmaids.  I didn’t want a huge bridal party at first, but I ended up with 6 bridesmaids, which I think is on the big side.  It’s basically a best friend from every “stage” in my life.  But if you keep it as family only, I think you’ll be able to avoid hurting people’s feelings.  How many people would it be if you included everyone who expects to be a bridesmaid?

Post # 4
Member
1850 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: March 2012

I think it’s good that you are choosing to have people in your wedding party that are considered to be family. You don’t want to look at those wedding pics down the road and see someone you never talk to in a whole lot of them. Hopefully your high school girl friends will understand.

Maybe you give them less important jobs at your wedding? Someone to have people sign the guest book, maybe someone to do a reading or sing a song during the ceremony? Just a suggestion:)

Post # 5
Member
987 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2009

yeah but you get over it.

Post # 8
Member
17 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: August 2011

Yes, its hard to make these decisions, and its even harder not to offend someone. I picked family and only two close friends to make a party of six and still faced backlash. One of my highschool friend’s mother lashed out at me for not picking her daughter claiming that she could see I wasn’t a “real friend” and that are friendship “clearly didn’t mean anything.” To play it safe, my sister only put family in her party, and still she had a friend upset that she wasn’t picked. In the end, you can’t focus on how you think people will react. Just choose people that you know you will not regret having in your party, people you know will appreciate it, and people you know you’ll still be friends with you years to come. The rest, if they care for you enough, will learn to be happy with you choices. 

Post # 9
Member
149 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

It’s hard to pick bridesmaids because women are so sensitive but I just picked my very best friends and everyone else can suck it.

Post # 11
Member
233 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

 I ran into the same problem. I was actually in my friend’s wedding back in 2004 and didn’t ask her to be in mine because we just aren’t as close as we used to be. I felt bad but realized I just wanted to be surrounded by people I was close to int he present, and also people my fiance was close to, not people I used to be close to.

I’m sure other people have suggested it, but maybe there are other options for you to include them. Maybe as ushers or readers or candle lighters, things like that.

 Most importantly, I think maybe they won’t be as upset as you think they will be.

Post # 13
Member
4755 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

I picked with entirely different criteria.

My maids were not picked on who my best friends were. I have best friends who have not supported my relationship as *much* as some of my other “good” friends. So while you think I might choose my best friends, I did not. I choose my “good friends” who have supported me, him and the relationship. And yes, the “best friends” were offended but only slightly.

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