Well my wedding has finally passed and I’m very sad because I lost so much respect for one of my bridesmaids that I’m pretty sure this ruined our friendship for good.
First off I started with 6 and ended with 4. I had to tell one to step down because she had began using cocaine, and the other is a hippy and couldn’t even give me her address. She said she would tell me by the end of august (wedding was october 5) and I never heard from her. She is in Oklahoma somewhere, never even called or said congratulations on FB! This is after years of telling me how she can’t wait to be my bridesmaid one day and what a good friend I have always been to her. But wait, this is not even the Bridesmaid or Best Man that I lost alot of respect for. I knew her lifestyle and that she was a bit unpredictable so it just didn’t even surprise me. Another Bridesmaid or Best Man actually put a paper over my invitation with the wrong date of the wedding…she is just simple. No hard feelings I found out before the wedding day so she made it.
The Bridesmaid or Best Man that really hurt me is the one that should have understood the most what I was going through because I had just been her Maid/Matron of Honor the previous year. As her Maid/Matron of Honor I planned her bridal shower for 80 plus women and her bachelorette party. She also lives in RI and I live in MD but I never once complained about having to take time out of work to go up there. I went up 3 times…for dress shopping, for the bridal shower/bachelorette party, and then finally the wedding. The cost of being her Maid/Matron of Honor was well in the thousands of dollars for me.
So then it’s her turn, she didn’t have to travel but once down here for the wedding. I went up there for my bridal shower (which she did nothing to plan and didn’t even contribute in the cost) and she was treated to a wine tasting, hay ride, and some lunch. She didn’t even bring a gift! I spent $100 on her bridal shower gift on top of planning the whole thing!
The bachelorette party was that night, we were getting dinner and bar hopping for a bit before ending at the same club HER bachelorette party was. She had agreed only to go to the first half because clubbing wasn’t her “thing”. WHAT? That was what she WANTED to do for hers and she had a good time on her night! Whatever, I didn’t even raise a stink about it. Well, me and all the other girls are at the restaurant waiting on her and she keeps calling saying she cant find it but isn’t taking any advice or directions from anyone. Says she will call me back, so I figure she is probably not going to come and since we have already been waiting 30mins on her we order…no big deal. Sure enough she calls back and says a bunch of stuff about them not being able to find parking etc…(mind you her ride could have just dropped her off, no need to park) so I say it’s fine we figured you werent going to make it so we ordered, and she hangs up on me as if I did something wrong. Never even apologized for not making it, or ever called or asked me if I had a good time.
That isn’t all. For the dresses all I asked the girls to buy was an off white/beige sundress. The most expensive dress was $32 that one girl bought. I asked them to all have them by a month before the wedding, this gave them 7 months. All the other girls did except her. 2 weeks before the wedding when I was up there for my bridal shower/bach she still had not bought a dress. 1 week before the wedding on sunday she still had not bought a dress but she said “don’t worry”. Are you frigging kidding me?! I stopped even asking her and by this time I started thinking she was just planning on bailing on my wedding all together. I asked one of the other BMs if they could see if she wanted to go shopping with them so she could get a similar dress. That Bridesmaid or Best Man tells me she said she doesn’t have time to go shopping with her. I never do hear from her.
Friday before the wedding I get a text from her that says they arrived to their hotel, are taking a nap then going shopping. I’m almost amazed that she’s even here. Slightly disappointed though that she is not offering to help at all with setting up for the wedding. My wedding was in a bare bones barn and EVERYTHING had to be set up the day before. But I’m figuring she had to go shopping for a dress. I call her later that night because she was asking me details about the rehearsal dinner. I ask her if she has a dress and she said yes. So I ask if that was what she went shopping for. She said no and started yelling at me for assuming that and says she got her dress on monday. Made no sence to me because the other Bridesmaid or Best Man had asked her to go shopping on wednesday. And she freaks out saying” are you really going to give me an attitude after I just drove ALL the way down here?!” I wanted to be like ya know what, I didn’t even give you an attitude but if you want one you sure as hell do deserve it. I mean with everything else I had to do/worry/stress out about for this wedding you having a dress 1 week before the wedding should not have been one of them. And don’t even try to guilt me for driving down here once, I did it 3 times for you and I work weekends so I had to take time out of work on top of it not you. I call the other Bridesmaid or Best Man that had asked her to go shopping and it turned out that she misread the text and that she had said she had a dress already and wouldn’t have time anyways. i ask that BM to apologize to her for giving me wrong information. However it isn’t like she ever told ME she had gotten a dress so how can she even get mad by me asking if she had to buy a dress when she got here. ugh and it was the worst timing ever for us to have that argument because I had just had a breakdown at the barn while setting up because we were running late, things weren’t getting finished and I had to leave to go to the rehearsal. I had woken up at 7am and had been non-stop running the whole day, had only half a can of sprite and nothing to eat. I ended up crying like 3 times during rehearsal because I was just stressed to the max.
Wedding day she leaves the wedding early, didn’t talk to me once during the reception, just sat at a table with her husband and acted miserable, and never volunteered to help with clean up. I helped them clean everything at hers, bought her drinks, and mingled with her guests that looked bored and tried to keep the dance floor going.
My wedding had a dancefloor, openbar, cornhole, horseshoes, beerpong, and a really nice park you could walk around(no reason to not have fun). Blah sorry for the rant but yea those are my Bridesmaid or Best Man horror stories.