(Closed) Worst Bridesmaid Story??

posted 9 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 48
Member
2478 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

Not for the first time I realise that my decision to have one bridesmaid – aged 2 and a half and my granddaughter – was a very wise one! There was no dress drama since I bought her a beautiful frock from Debenhams. She thought it was the “Bestest dress, EVER, Nanny!” and apart from an insistence on trying it on every few days, we had no dress drama.

Naturally, at two and a half, she was relieved of any duties other than walking in alongside me. holding my hand, and sitting as quietly as possible (she did great!) during the more serious parts of the ceremony. 

I don’t know how people cope with flaky bridesmaids but somewhere along the line it makes you wonder whether everyone ought to be issued with a check list of expectations! Only most drama seems to occur when people really aren’t clear what their role is and how they’ll be expected (or otherwise) to help. I don’t blame the bride here but since everyone has different ideas of what being a Bridesmaid or Best Man entails, it’d make things clearer up front. How you’d actually prepare a checklist without coming across as Bridezilla I don’t actually know though!

Post # 49
Member
347 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

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@jo.lee:  neither of the things you listed seem that unreasonable, holding tissues and tums because her stomach was probably in knots

Post # 50
Member
347 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

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@jo.lee:  oh I miss read that I thought you said the bride asked you

 

Post # 51
Member
128 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: July 2014

Well…where do I start…

1) Gave us 6 weeks notice to get to her interstate wedding
2) After I had already booked accomodation changed the location of the wedding to the other side of the city. Deposits for accomodation were non refundable so we now had an hour commute everywhere.
3) Told us to buy any pink dress online. I found five and got her to pick one for me. I bought it and paid for it. When it arrived she said it was the wrong colour pink. So I am out of pocket my first dress.
4) She chose another dress online. I bought it. It arrived and it was so short my bottom was hanging out. When I tried to explain this to her she didn’t believe me, accused me of being difficult and a drama queen. So I put on the “dress”, took a photo and sent it to her…..I am out of pocket dress number 2….
5) Found a dress in the shops….this is dress number 3…it was expensive….she said it was the wrong colour again…at this point it is 2 weeks to go to the wedding. My parents were sick and I didn’t have time to keep searching for her non-existant shade of pink….finally she said it was fine…now to the wedding itself…..which cost us about $1000 to attend (accomodation, flights, dresses etc). Had to also buy shoes, makeup etc. Nightmare.

This “friend” did not bother to keep in contact for a year after her wedding then got upset when I didn’t ask her to be a bridesmaid in mine…Some people are just beyond help 

Post # 52
Member
16 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: June 2014

Boy am I glad to read other people have had problems too. I am crushed. I had 4 bridesmaids and now only have two.

The first one I lost was my brother’s long time Girlfriend. They broke up and she told me she didn’t want to be a bridesmaid. Now they have gotten back together but I have horrible feelings towards her. I really think I may hate her now….I feel like she basically told me unless my brother is in the picture we really aren’t friends.

 

The 2nd one was my long time childhood best friend. I had to ask her to not be my bridesmaid. She lost custody of her child for testing positive for cocaine and her kid went into foster care (she’s 16 years old!) Her kid tested positive too! She basically told me she could not attend any of my bridal things because of her situation. I told her it would be better for both of us if she just came as a guest.

My other two bridesmaids are my fiance’s sisters. I feel very sad not to have someone on my side standing up with me. I am very angry and have become a bitter b word.

Post # 53
Member
16 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: June 2014

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@Rachel631:  She sounds CRAZY. You are so patient. You are like a saint or something lol

Post # 54
Member
7976 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: July 2013 - UK

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@cgirl:  Ha ha! Thanks. She was OK on the day, actually. Just as well, because I was realy stressed from doing so much DIY set up, and I might have actually killed her…

Post # 55
Member
3 posts
Wannabee
  • Wedding: January 2014

HELP!!!!!

Ok so here is my story,

I have 5 bridesmaids and a maid of honor. My sister (23 yo) is a bridesmaid  (or supposed to be) in my wedding which is in less than one month.

Invitations to my wedding went out almost a year ago, due to the fact that I  am having a destination wedding in the Bahamas, while cruising on a Royal  Caribbean Cruise. My fiance and I have been together for 8 years, and were  engaged on board a RCC. SOOOO in February I started looking for a dress. My  sister, and mother both ditched out on going with me dress shopping….  Whatever… so I purchased a dress that day, while at the dress shop I had asked  all my girs (5 in total) to be my bridesmaids. I was waiting to name a Maid/Matron of Honor in  case my sister started showing some interest.

Time goes by… I am being VERY relaxed about the bridesmaids dresses. I  chose the color Coral, and for fabric: chiffon, since it is a beach wedding. I  told the girls that they can choose any style dress they want so long that it  was the right color/fabirc. I then sent them TWO links to two different websites  with HUNDREDS of styles that had the same color that I was looking for. Everyone  has purchased and recieved a dress except for my sister.

My sister also did not attend my bridal shower (which is fine she just moved  away) but did not send a gift iether. She has not purchased ANYTHING  for the wedding at all… dress/shoes/jewelry and my wedding is a month  away!!

OHHHHH and I forgot to mention, she has in the last month, shaved the  sides of her head so that she has a mohawk, dyed the front of her hair BRIGHT  PINK and got snakebite piercings (which if you don’t know, that means she has  two lip piercings on her bottom lip)

When I approached her about her hair, I asked her to first dye it a natural  color, and she was so mad, (and has not yet agreed to do so) then she freaked  out when I started contemplating hairstyles for her. Her statement to me was “I  was under the impression that I am in charge of my own $%#*ing head”. I tried to  explain to her that during a wedding, it is no uncommon for the bride to specify  a hairstyle for the maids, but she wants to SPIKE IT UP IN A MOHAWK.

So now I don’t know if she will get a dress, I don’t know what to do about  her hair, and I have to try to figure out what to do about the lip piercings as  well. As the day gets closer, I am stressing majorly.

What do I do???!!!! Am I being insane for asking her to dye her hair for one  week? or to replace the metal rods in her face with flesh colored ones? She is  acting like I am a bridezilla and I am asking her to do so much.

Read more: http://boards.weddingbee.com/topic/sister-drama-8?replies=1#post-

Post # 56
Member
496 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: City, State

These stories are bananas. I’m so glad I’m thinking of just having my sister as my Maid/Matron of Honor and that’s it. 

Post # 57
Member
70 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

My sister was my maid of honor. My best friend planned my bachelorette and I didn’t have a shower so THE ONLY thing she had to do was make a speech. She got up to make her speech and announced that she forgot to bring it and proceeded to “ummm” for a solid two minutes before the DJ intevened. The best man made a wonderful heartwarming speech which made hers so much worse. Seriously, sister, ONE JOB. 

Post # 58
Member
982 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2014

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@Ridlonc:  Whoa.  I don’t think you’re being unreasonable in this case.  If she had that particular look (the bright pink mohawk and piercings) when you actually asked her, then I’d say yes.  But since this has all transpired recently, I’d probably want to ask her to die her hair too!  Or at the minimum, not style it as a mohawk for that ONE day.  And although I say I’d ask her to die it also, I wouldn’t expect it.  She’s 23.  She died it that way for a reason and no one can make her change it.  The styling of it is where you might have some room to work with her.

Although, those are pretty severe style changes to make in such a short amount of time.  I’d gather something is going on personally for her so it might be best to just ask her if she still event WANTS to be a bridesmaid? Yikes, I don’t know…

Post # 58
Member
178 posts
Blushing bee

If I could go back in time, we just would’ve selected a cool location (Iceland perhaps?) and eloped and taken awesome photos. Then we would’ve had a small shindig with our family & friends when we got back. 

We’ve been incredibly nice and understanding. We don’t really ask much of our wedding party in terms of time or money. We send out e-mails and try to come to a concensus on dates so that our schedules work for all of those involved. 

I think once you add people, even people that you think are your good friends. Some people get really weird and their deeper personalities come out. I think if I were in someones wedding party I would be the type of person that would want to be helpful, not stress out the bride/groom. 

Even when picking the date for our wedding I contacted our bridal party to find out what their schedules were like and moved it because I didn’t want people to be too overwhelmed. I guess some people just aren’t as curteous. 

My Maid/Matron of Honor and 1 bridesmaid are amazing, 1 of them is terrible at communication (weeks to get simple answers..but I understand, she gets overwhelmed really easily), the last is just terrible at communication and frugal to the point of it kind of being insulting, especially since she has no issues with taking and asking for favours (which we oblige). 

Yeah, sometimes you can get awesome bridal parties and other times they’re more stress than helpful. If I could go back I’d just have a Maid/Matron of Honor and that’s it. Or elope. 

Post # 58
Member
1789 posts
Buzzing bee

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MrsTrigger:  Mcdonalds??? Really? LOL

Post # 59
Member
1 posts
Wannabee
  • Wedding: October 2014

My wedding was about two months ago and I had bridesmaids from hell. Here’s my story.

After we got engaged it was pretty clear that my sister would be my maid of honor and best friend would be my bridesmaid along with another friend. These three people didn’t know each other so I plannend nice little get together so we could get to know each other.I told them to bring pics of dresses they liked as I wanted them to wear something they liked and felt comfy in. On that day my sister and best friend threw a tantrum. They only wanted to wear dresses that they liked and they felt good in. Nothing else. My sister didn’t want to wear the shoes I would’ve liked them to wear cause according to her they were ugly and when wearing them she wouldn’t feel good about herself. They both didn’t want to sit near me in the church. They only wanted to sit next to their boyfriends. They were worrying about where they would sit at the dinner table cause they didn’t prefer to sit next to people they don’t know. They demanded I book a hairdresser and makeup artist for them so they could look pretty that day.

After that I felt so stressed out and unhappy. I tried to talk to my sister about it but according to her she wasn’t doing anything wrong. I was so frustrated with them so I called them of the bridesmaids duties

I asked two other friends to be bridesmaids and they were wonderful!

During the rest of the wedding prep my sister and best friend would constantly comment on my decisions about everything. Specially my sister who would totally bring me down with her nasty comments.

To top I alloff the worst thing happened at my bachelorette. My best friend told me she couldn’t make it the whole day cause she was stressed from her work. She never told me this befor only on the day itself. And apparently my sister, best friend and my mother in law and sisters in law were gossiping about me. On my own bachelorette these people made comments about how I was treating them. Someone said I only marry nick forfor his money. My best friend told them I was sending he r too many texts and other crap. I felt so frustrated and angry when I heard this happened. My best friend still had the nerve to attend the wedding. She didn’t say a single word to me all day. My sister never even wrote a card or gave us a gift.

And now two months later my best friend is no longer my friend. She’s now friends with my sister. They both meet up to talk about the wedding. My sister tells me everything that’s happened is my own fault. Even them gossiping about me is my own fault cause I deserved it.

I am so frustrated cause I don’t know why people would do such things. I still don’t know what made them act all crazy. I guess I will never get any answers…

Post # 60
Member
3 posts
Wannabee
  • Wedding: November 2015

My bridesmaid was getting engaged around the time I was. She is a good friend but doesn’t know where to draw the line. She loves my ring and wanted to try it on every chance she got. One fine day- she gets engaged. And we’re all really happy for her. But then I noticed her ring. It’s the same design as mine- just is a different metal and with a larger centerstone. She goes around flaunting that her rock is bigger than mine- and basically that her fiance loves her more. All right before my wedding is coming up.

 

So…she totally upstaged me!

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