Worst sex ever? What was yours?

posted 1 year ago in Intimacy
Post # 2
Member
341 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: December 2018

Well this one time I was having sex with a guy I had met online and been dating for a few weeks.  He fish-hooked me..which I didn’t even know was a thing until it happened to me.  Basically just hooked his finger around my mouth while we were doing doggy style and then proceeding to call me a dirty whore.  But he was such a gentleman outside of the bedroom!  I was super confused.  I broke up with him the following day.

Also not sure if this one counts since it wasn’t technically the sex that was bad..but this one time in high school I got broken up with immediately after sex, no joke, I was in the middle of putting my pants back on!

Post # 4
Member
3408 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2016

aybeecee :  I would consider that to be great sex. 😂

Post # 5
Member
378 posts
Helper bee

I had a one night stand thing. 

At some point we were chatting about what we liked and didn’t like. He asked me if I liked anal. 

Which my go to has always been, “If you like anal.”

So, then we set up a date to buy him a butt plug. 

I was auditioning him for a FWB, but it was just so terrible. Everything was going really well, we had a great time out  and then I got him home annnndddd then goes on to tell me how “East Indian people are cheap” because he didn’t get a tip. 

I immediately was turned off, but we had already made it all that way. So. 

Thus began the 2nd longest blow job of my life. 

Then we went to the missionary, where he flopped around on me with his giant weiner. The worse part was that he laid his face right next to mine. Like flat on the bed, staring at me with these dumb eyes while he moaned in a  high pitched way that reminded me of really bad amateur porn. 

After that he rolled off and asked me “Is it usually hard for you to cum?”
Which I had to awkwardly tell him that no,  it wasn’t usually. 

Position change, some more flopping where I just had to pretend to cum.  

He hadn’t. Cue the actual longest blow job of my life, feat. amateur moans. 

After 25 minutes or so I told him he just had to finish himself. Then there was 5 minutes of begging on his part. Then he finished. 

I was excited because then I could get rid of him and never repeat this experience again–but, then he wanted to chat. Which normally I wouldn’t mind, except for the comment about East Indian people was still sitting with me. 

I work at an animal clinic so then he asked me “What’s the worst thing I’d ever seen?”

When I told him I don’t really want to talk about that he proceeded to tell me about horrible things that happen to animals else where in the world. Which, I don’t want to hear. I told him that to no avail. 

Alas, we eventually had to part ways. 

Not without a small disagreement about him taking*his* butt plug home (that had been in his butt) and he had me confirm that he we’d see each other again a few dozen times. 

My jaw was sore for days. 

Sometimes I think I hear his high pitched moaning on the wind and shudder. 

 

 

 

 

Post # 7
Member
378 posts
Helper bee

Mrs.MilitaryBee :

I know and I let him! I think it was a tactic to get his foot back in the door because then he texted me for a month after about wanting his butt plug back. Like, just randomly in the middle of the night my phone would light up with

“Give me my fucking butt plug back.”

I told him I’d paypal the 20$, but he didn’t want that. 

 

I closed auditons after that one. 

 

Post # 8
Member
341 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: December 2018

lovelyruby :  no judgements here lol, different strokes for different folks!

Post # 9
Member
1439 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 2019 - City, State

Literally had a guy lick my face.  I mean full tongue, from chin to forehead up the side of my face.  The sex was boring and rhythmless to begin with and I was just sort of hoping he would be done soon and then…that.

My now FH teases me about it all the time and says one day he’s going to do it just to see my face, lol.

Post # 10
Member
4058 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

“Put it in”

“I already did”

 

….that about summarizes.

Post # 12
Member
831 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2019 - City, State

Mine is a little dramatic, but we didn’t actually get to the dirty.

Fresh out of high school, I decided it would be “way cool” to get my ears pierced. Not just two studs, but an industrial bar (long bar running from tip of cartilidge to bottom), and second holes on each side – all within a week of each other. I also chose that week to make new friends with this server I “worked” with at a small BBQ restaurant. 

I went over his house to “hang out”, we got to kissing, all the like….and he thinks it’s a good idea to kiss/lick/bite my ear….with all the fresh wounds. Of course, pretty much everything started to bleed, so we had to stop. I used saline he had and tried to clean the SALIVA out of the new piercings to stave off infection and rejection. I spent $40 on the bar (a lot of money for an 18 year old!) and I’d be damned if I had to take it out because of someone’s nasty fetish. 

Needless to say, I got on my bike and went home shortly after to do a thorough cleaning.

Post # 13
Member
2017 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: April 2018

It was dramtic or anything. Just right before my ex boyfriend and I broke up, like days before  we had sex. He felt half hard the whole 3 minutes we were going at it. I didn’t get off and just felt so gross afterwards. Still can’t believe I was with him for 5 years. 

Post # 14
Member
115 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: March 2018

Mrs.MilitaryBee :  Did we date the same guy? Same situation. He was nice, but the sex was horrible and boring. I tried to talk to him about my needs/wants, but it was always about him getting off. And it wasn’t even remotely good. He’s on the small side so I barely feel him inside me and then his entire weight is on top of me and he’s just using his toes to move back and forth for friction like he’s fucking a mattress or something flat. I couldn’t have moved if I wanted to, I could barely breathe. Every. Damn. Time. I finally gave up on him. I couldn’t live like that.

Post # 15
Member
726 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2017

I had a FWB from teacher’s college that I would usually go home with if we ran into each other on a night out. He was always stupid drunk so our sex was usually mediocre at best but I always hooked up with him anyways, cause I get horny when I’m drunk so, meh.

THE WORST THOUGH… We ended up at some house party together and we go upstairs, start having sex and we are both suuuuper drunk… so we’re switching positions and I get on top reverse style.. A couple minutes in and I notice he suddenly doesn’t feel hard. I turn around and he’s PASSED OUT!

I was pissed but decided to go to sleep, a few hours later I wake up cause my leg feels all wet…. he was so drunk he had pissed the bed. 

I was so disgusted with everything… myself.. him… he messaged me the next day asking why I left so early and I just never answered him.. also the day I decided no more drunk hookups for this girl.

 

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