(Closed) Would being in school make you want to stop your BF from proposing?

posted 6 years ago in Waiting
Post # 32
Member
815 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2015

If you are nervous about balancing wedding planning and school work, you can get engaged and not actually start hard – core planning for a bit.

I feel like getting engaged is kind of like having a baby in that there is never a “perfect time”

Post # 33
Member
7000 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2012

I think it depends on how far through school you are. I personally feel like getting engaged means you are ready to actively start planning your wedding and move foward with getting married. If it’s your last year in college and you are going to start planning and get married then, yeah, I don’t see a problem.

I don’t understand conciously getting engaged when you have no intentions of getting married for years. Like when I hear people say “we want to get engaged this year, but we won’t be having a wedding until 2017”. Like, what’s the point in engaged getting? 

Post # 34
Member
621 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2014

@southernbelle381:  FH proposed shortly after high school just before starting university and our wedding is about 3 weeks into my summer vacation. I currently go to school full time, work part time and still wedding plan, I am a multi-tasker (;. Seriosuly though, it isn’t hard, planning your wedding shouldn’t be a 8 hour day thing, if someone wasn’t in school they would most likely be working full time while planning a wedding.

Post # 36
Member
238 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

We got engaged our second year of uni, married in our third, and are now entering our fourth as husband and wife! 

 

Really, it is quite easy to do. Try to plan it over a break (we didn’t) and make sure you keep up with your uni/work whatever… I made a little rule that no wedding planning could happen in daylight hours. 

Post # 37
Member
463 posts
Helper bee

Yes, when I was in college and my boyfriend (older, already graduated) was ready for marriage, I had to tell him I wasn’t even ready to think about it, let alone do it. I was definitely not ready for marriage until I had graduated and gotten a job. I think that’s pretty common. He was happy to respect my feelings and not talk about it until I was ready.

Post # 38
Member
489 posts
Helper bee

I wasn’t in school, but my Fiance proposed when I was studying for the bar exam (definitely more time consuming than school was for me).  I actually did the bulk of my planning durring my “study-months” and also passed the bar.  It’s totally doable if you want to make it work. 

Post # 39
Member
71 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: November 2013

Husband proposed a year and a half into my four year grad program. We had always talked about wanting a long engagement so it worked out perfectly. We had a whole year for me to really concentrate on school and by the time wedding planning really started I was just doing an internship so I could take weekends to plan. It worked really well and if you know that you could make it work without too much adjustment or planning, it really can be doable.

Post # 40
Member
3400 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

My husband proposed to me the summer going into our junior year of college, and we got married a year later in the summer going into our senior year of college. Happy married for 6 months now & don’t regret the timing a bit.

It’s not right for everybody, but it’s right for some.

Post # 41
Member
831 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: Either Philadelphia City Hall or a small chapel.

No,but, I also want a small wedding and more money will go into a later honeymoon.

Post # 42
Member
567 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

We got engaged while my husband was still in undergrad, and got married about two weeks after he graduated. It wasn’t too difficult to plan – he actually had a big hand in the whole deal. 

However, I don’t know if I would have wanted to plan a wedding while I was in school. I think age has something to do with it, more so than me being in school or not. But if you’re ready to be engaged, college isn’t necessarily a barrier. 

Post # 43
Member
289 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2014

@southernbelle381:  Hey!  I am currently working full-time (40 hours) and doing my Masters via distance evenings and weekends, which adds on 20 hours of homework a week.  So I’ll add to your post ๐Ÿ™‚

We got engaged in summer, a month before I started my Master’s program.  I felt like I was able to enjoy the feeling and excitment of my engagement for exactly one week, and I feel like I missed out now ๐Ÿ™

I had started a new professional job the week we got engaged, and it requires travelling so it was a little overwelming already with so much change and learning. Then we started wedding planning a week after because we know how everything gets booked, and even planning 14 months in advance we couldn’t get the venues/photographer we wanted.

Then I started my Masters, and wow, I have been overwhelmed. Masters, home renos, new job, AND wedding planning.  Can we say stressed?

My advice.. if you feel like you are ready, then go for it.  But try and enjoy the time as a newly engaged couple.  I regret not enjoying it more.  I wish we could have planned a weekend away together right after.  I wish I didn’t have so many other things in my life going on to take away from that excitement.

I also wish we kinda waited until 2015 to get married, but its too late now.  So I’m taking the summer semester off to focus on ONE thing for awhile – our wedding. 

Also, maybe look into a wedding planner if you can afford one.  I’m very detail oriented and kinda a control freak, so I knew that option wasn’t going to work for me, but maybe it could help others!

Post # 45
Member
289 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2014

@southernbelle381:  No problem.

Just take the time to find time, and enjoy it.

You can stop life for a wedding, you can’t stop life for school.  So just try to divide your time and energy.  If you don’t have enough for both, you may need to prioritize which gets less effort for awhile.

Glad I could help a bit! ๐Ÿ™‚

Post # 46
Member
1129 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

@southernbelle381:  I am in college and planning. It is sort of stressful sometimes, and I had to quit work for this semester, but you’ll be fine!

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