(Closed) Would I be out of line to put an age limit for my guests?

posted 6 years ago in Family
  • poll: Would I be totally out of line to put an age limit for my guests?
    Yes, Adults and Children OR Adults only : (16 votes)
    36 %
    No : (28 votes)
    64 %
  • Post # 3
    Member
    2819 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: February 2013

    I think that it’s totally fine to set a limit…however, five sounds a bit strange. Might come across as obvious that you only wanted certain kids there. Usually the cutoff is 10 or older (I’ve seen 10, 12, 14 & 16).

    (And to children under 5 count for a headcount anyways? Somehow I would doubt it….)

    Post # 5
    Member
    7902 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper
    • Wedding: March 2012 - Pelican Grand Beach Resort

    Why don’t you set up a kids’ plan?  You could invite them to the ceremony, but have a babysitter in a hotel room with pizza and movies and games and things for the kids while the adults are at the reception.

    Alternately, it’s totally normal to have different rules for your bridal party.  You can allow them to bring their families and tell others that this is exactly what you are doing.

    Post # 7
    Member
    7902 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper
    • Wedding: March 2012 - Pelican Grand Beach Resort

    My venue was able to suggest someone to me from their recommended vendors.

    Post # 9
    Member
    6892 posts
    Busy Beekeeper
    • Wedding: March 2012

    Are all the kids involved family? If not, what about a family children only approach rather than an age?

    If not, I agree with PP that 5 sounds a bit odd. Maybe 7 or 8, as that’s when kids start to understand social functions better. I dk.

    Post # 11
    Member
    6892 posts
    Busy Beekeeper
    • Wedding: March 2012

    @lindseyl06:  So is a family-only approach easiest?

    Post # 12
    Member
    4337 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: September 2012

    @lindseyl06:  I know PPs said 5 is an odd cut off, but I’m doing “No kids under age 5” at the ceremony. This is to avoid crying/tantrums during the ceremony (only one or two kids are over 5 and they are well-behaved), and no one has seemed to think it strange yet.

    Post # 13
    Hostess
    11167 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper

    As Jenniphyr mentioned are you sure that these smaller children apply to the 50 guest maximum? My venue doesn’t include children under two at all and children 5-10 are half price so they aren’t noted under the adult head count.

    In My Humble Opinion I would think that children UNDER 5 would be the hardest to leave at home as they are small and probably not often left alone without their parents, even smaller children perhaps still breast feeding. I’m not a parent so perhaps I’m way off base.

     

    Post # 15
    Member
    133 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: March 2012

    It’s your wedding and honestly if you would rather leave out a bunch of little kids that won’t even remember the day and will probably just end up crying or making the parents leave early anyway, then that is totally fine in my book. We decided early on that the time and place where we wanted to have our wedding was not apt for children. I was very specific on the invites. I put each individuals name on the outer envelope and on the inside invitation. I even put: “We have reserved __ spaces for you.” and filled in the blank with the exact number of guests invited to the wedding. Granted in spanish it doesn’t sound so blunt, but maybe you can tweak the wording. We even made a point of specifying kind of off handedly to the one couple we were most worried about that kids were not allowed. Even with all that, the wife still had the audacity to ask if she could bring her 6 yr. old. We politely replied that she couldn’t as we had decided that children would not be in attendance and that this applied to all guests. And that we would still really love to share this special day with her and her husband as they are family and we really care about them. I’m hoping they will make it, after all she asked after she had rsvp’ed “yes”. If they don’t then they’re very selfish in my opinion. Babysitters don’t cost a fortune. Just be clear about “the rule”, if 5 is the cut-off, and stick to it, no exceptions. I don’t think you should have to sacrifice anything in your wedding to invite people you don’t want there, even if they are cute little kids and their parents might get offended. You should make it clear from the start, no wishy-washy answers when they ask, and guilt them a bit by saying how much their presence means to you. Hopefully they’ll be considerate and not make a big deal out of it. Good luck!

    Post # 16
    Member
    47 posts
    Newbee
    • Wedding: April 2012

    Personally I am not having any kids except for my fiance’s nephew who’s the ringbearere there. So it’s your day do what you want. Pluss do you really want a bunch of little kids running around touching the cake crying telign their parents they’re bored. As a kid the only fun wedding I went to was one where they had a pinata all other weddings were boring. Good luck on your decision.

     

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