(Closed) Would this be rude? FSIL baby

posted 6 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
Member
8163 posts
Bumble Beekeeper

@hollyberry4:  I imagine they would be grateful. That sounds like a very generous offer, not any kind of punishment! Phrase it that way — since they’ll be new parents, you want them to have privacy and a place where they can make themselves at home. Don’t say anything about squalling babies or other people needing sleep (unless it sounds like their balking at the offer of their own place – it might be appropriate to mention it then.)

Post # 4
Member
7673 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

First, well done for allowing the 2 month old at the wedding. IMO normal “no kids” rules don’t apply to newborns because they’re almost impossible to leave with sitters, and don’t run around.

As a parent, I can understand that a house full of people wouldn’t want to share the house with a 2 month old. I personally wouldn’t be offended, in fact the separate house would be a relief. Perhaps other parents would be offended. But bad luck if it seems rude, you don’t want to be woken at all hours by a baby. I assume you’re paying for the farmhouse so you get to make the rules.

But I’m confused, will the groomsmen be in the barnhouse too? Or will they be in the farmhouse now?

Post # 6
Member
7673 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

@hollyberry4:  What about the groom’s parents, since they will be the grandparents of the little one? I can’t imagine anyone else being suitable, either from their own point of view or from the point of view of the baby’s mother. (Picture baby’s mom breastfeeding on the couch in her dressing gown and bed hair). So if the groom’s parents don’t want to sleep there, it might be best to let them have the barnhouse to themselves.

Post # 8
Member
3638 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2015

Can I just say that your wedding sounds like it’s going to be heaps of fun! I want to stay in the farmhouse too!!

I would certainly offer them the barnhouse, it sounds wonderful.

Post # 9
Member
2253 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

I think it’s great and not rude at all. As parents, they probably would be relieved to know that their child won’t keep anyone else up at night. 

Post # 10
Member
7673 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

How loud is a 2 month old? It’s hard to predict. Sometimes they wake up, make a little noise, and calm down and start drinking as soon as they get the breast (or bottle). But sometimes there is something wrong (with ours it was usually wind or reflux) and they just start screaming…

There’s a fair chance the sound will carry enough to bother you if you’re a light sleeper. On the night before your wedding, I don’t think you want to take a chance.

Of course if you need the space, Fiance could talk to his brother and insist they stay in a hotel. I don’t think that’s an unreasonable request. He’d be asking his brother to think of the other people, who need a good sleep before the big day.

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