Post # 1
So here’s the situation…I have a Maid/Matron of Honor and one more Bridesmaid or Best Man whom I am very close to and love dearly. These are my only real friends. I’ve always just been very introverted, and never really had a large circle of friends. So i’ve got 2 for my bridal party. My FH also has two groomsmen, but he would really like to add a third guy that he is very close with. I am all for this and love all the guys he picked, but I hate the idea of an uneven bridal party….I know it’s my wedding and I don’t “have” to have any certain number of people, blah blah, but it would just really bother me… So, how weird would it be to ask my cousin who is the same age, who I’m not particularly close with? She’s been excited and helpful about the wedding planning every time I’ve talked to her (at family functions), but we don’t hang out besides that, but I definitely would. I was actually thinking about trying to hang out with her more before I even got engaged, because I do like her as a person lol. I’ve been planning this whole wedding in a very short amount of time (7 months, and the big day is Sept. 6th), so would it be weird/innapropriate/awkward to ask her to be a bridesmaid? I’m not very far along in the bridesmaid stuff, and I don’t even have dresses picked out for the other two, so maybe it’s not too late? I’m just feeling kind of sad and embarassed that I only have 2 friends, and I don’t want to tell my fiance no. 🙁
Post # 2
Ask her! It will give you two a chance to bond 🙂
Post # 3
Actually, I don’t think it’s wierd at all to have 3 groomsmen and 2 bridesmaids.
Also, the awkwardness of inviting a 3rd Bridesmaid or Best Man that isn’t close to you, just to “even things out,” would be wierder.
Just my $0.02.
Post # 4
i would feel bad asking someone to spend money on a dress, shoes, hair, makeup, travel, etc. just for the sake of filling a spot to make both sides even.
and no one is going to be judging you or making fun of you for having a small (or uneven) bridal party.
Post # 5
we’re having 3 groomsmen and 2 bridesmaids. i think its about having the people who are genuinely special to you and have shared your life with up until now standing alongside you. I think it’s all about how you look at it; personally I feel super blessed to have two amazing best friends.
Post # 6
It’s weird.They are not props they are people. They are going to be asked to sorbs money and time to support this request for absolutely no reason.Also read all the pposts about people picking bridesmaids that they regret.
Post # 7
Yes, that would be weird. My Fiance is having 6 GMs and I’m having 4 BMs, it’s really not a big deal and you have to decide what’s more important: treating the people in your life like people instead of props or you “vision” of what a bridal party “should” look like that won’t matter at all on the day of.
Especially since this is your cousin I think you’d be putting her in a really weird/tight spot by asking her, I’m sure she’d feel obliged to say yes regardless of how she really felt.
Post # 8
I really don’t see a problem with asking your cousin to be a Bridesmaid or Best Man. I do agree with the PP who suggests that it could put her in a tight spot if it is not something she is expecting or would be prepared for. Is there a way to feel out her potential responce, perhaps asking your mom or another relative to help.
Post # 9
I don’t think you should ask her to be your bridesmaid. Just have two. Could your fiance ask the third to be an usher instead of a groosmen?
Post # 10
Does she know you already asked the other 2 ladies? If so, it might be awkward if she feels like a second tier invite. Just something to consider. Personally, I’d stick with my two close friends.
Post # 11
I had my Maid/Matron of Honor and no BMs. DH had 2 best men and another groomsman. 3 against 1, it looked fine and I’m usually obsessed with symmetry.
I think your cousin would feel obliged to say yes, even if she thought it was strange So I don’t think you should ask her. I would however, try to involve her as much as she wants in the planning process and try to become better friends with her.
Post # 12
I’ll be personally offended if I only got the honor to fill a gap in the photos.
Post # 13
I wouldnt ask someone I wasn’t close to. She may feel left out during the bridal party moments If she isn’t as close to you. I have three on my side and Fiance has 4. 🙂 it will be ok to be uneven
Post # 14
We have ten bridesmaids & eleven groomsmen. I know that’s a huge amount but we have large immediate families and a lot of really good friends.
Yes, I think it would be weird and somewhat selfish to ask your cousin to spend money on all the bridesmaids stuff (dress, shoes, hair/makeup, etc) if y’all aren’t even close. Uneven bridal parties are so common these days. Like you said, it’s your wedding so you don’t HAVE to have an even bridal party.
Post # 15
I say ask her!!!! You want to bond with her and become closer right? This is a great time to do so! As long as you are not going to have crazy demands for your bridesmaids, this should be fun!
I had 10 bridesmaids and all but 4 were my husband’s cousins. I really developed a friendship with all of them since!