(Closed) Would this bother you?

posted 7 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
2699 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

oooo difficult one! Has he asked you if you mind him going and missing your birthday or has he just told you he’s going?

Post # 4
Member
743 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

Yes – it would bug me too.  Would it bug me enough to tell him not to go on the trip?  No…….but it would still bug me. 

Curious…is this guy your SO or FI?

Post # 5
Member
2699 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

@Rock Hugger:

I’d feel exactly this…annoyed but not necessarily able to tell him he can’t go.

How long have you been together? thing is with men, it wouldn’t bother them if we missed their birthday!

 

Post # 6
Member
5423 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: November 2012

It would totally bother me.  And where I cannot dictate what one does, I would definitely express my discontent.  Chances are if I didn’t tell him how I felt I’d get mad at myself.

Post # 8
Member
743 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

The reason I asked about the SO vs Fiance thing…..and I say this with the HUGE caveat that all I know about your relationship is this one little issue you posted……but I used to date a guy that would do something just like this (go on a trip with a buddy and leave me home to work over my b-day).  I thought he was the dude I wanted to marry….but then I realized he was an asshole…..

Does your SO do things like this often?  If not, then maybe this is a way to “throw you off” if the big question is in your imment future……???

 

Post # 9
Member
2699 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

Tell him how you feel. He has to know how important this is to you. You can say no. So just say hey ‘we haven’t been together all that long and I want to spend my birthday with you.’ If he’s a decent guy, he’ll do it no questions asked.

Post # 10
Member
2699 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

God, actually that’s exactly what my Fiance did to me to throw me off his proposal!

Post # 11
Member
2260 posts
Buzzing bee

It would bug me too, so don’t worry you’re not being sensitive. Does he even realize that the trip and your birthday overlap and do you two generally spend every birthday together?

If you do, then I might be dropping hints how you can’t wait till your birthday and was hoping for something special.

Post # 12
Member
3120 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

It would bug me, but it wouldn’t worry me.  I’d take it as a compliment that he thinks of you as being secure enough to handle it!

Post # 14
Member
4824 posts
Honey bee

I would rather him tell me he wasnt going because of my bday, but then I would force him to go because my bday is not enough of a reason to miss the trip. I would be a little annoyed that my bday wasnt a consideration.

But I suppose that is playing silly woman games and at the end of the day if I want him to go, he should go. 

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