(Closed) Would this offend you: friend asking you to spend time without SO?

posted 9 years ago in Relationships
Post # 32
Member
706 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

@oracle: Not at all offended! I think it’s very healthy to spend time with friends without my fiance there (and I expect him to do the same as well).

Post # 33
Member
2699 posts
Sugar bee

We have a lot of mutual friends and often go out together. We gave nights without each other too though. When a girlfriend that is also friends with Fiance, I ask if he can come or if they want a girl thing. I haven’t gotten a negative reaction one way or another. I don’t get my feelings hurt or even upset when someone wants a girl’s night. I also don’t care if they have a guy’s night. I don’t see why she would be offended.

Post # 34
Member
994 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

It’s healthy to have time alone and time with your friends, and not spend every waking moment with your SO. If you can’t spend some time alone with your best friend outside the relationship, something is wrong.

Post # 35
Member
10283 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2011

Why would anyone be offended by that? Just because you’re married does not mean you’ve been surgically joined at the hip. If you never do things seperately you’re bound to get sick of eachother eventually. 

I don’t even understand why this chick would want her husband to join her and her friend. When my friends and I do things, Fiance is never included unless it’s a couples thing. He has absolutely no interest in going out to lunch with my friends and I. It would be like the most boring 2 hours of his life. I wouldn’t even want to put him through that, lol. 

Post # 36
Member
4479 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: March 2010 - Calamigos Ranch

I don’t usually invite my husband to these types of things if it’s not explicit that he come. He doesn’t need to be at a girls’ night, or if I’m hanging out with a friend one on one. I bring him when I’m invited out by other people in couples and their SOs are going to be there, but not ALL THE TIME to EVERYTHING. I like to have my own friends, too, and it’s hard to keep those friendships up if I never invest time in the relationships. I see DH often enough. 😉

Post # 37
Member
4544 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

I wouldn’t be offended either. I’m all for girls nights!

Post # 39
Member
236 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

It depends on the situation for me.  I have a friend, who always wants funtions to be “girls only”.  That gets frusterating/offensive, when she never wants to hang out with the FI’s/BF’s, cause we are all friends.  However, if it is a lunch for her birthday I’m totally okay with doing things her way.

Post # 40
Member
2247 posts
Buzzing bee

No, I definitely would not get offended because even though I am with somebody, I still retain my own identity.  Which means I am fully open to doing things without my Fiance, and he can do things without me.  If someone asks me to go shopping or out to lunch, or even for a little road trip, I am all for it.  I know my Fiance isn’t going to cheat when I’m gone, and a little time apart is necessary for sanity purposes.

Post # 41
Member
2247 posts
Buzzing bee

I actually HATE when I think I’m going for a girl’s day out and the girl brings her SO.  My cousin kept doing it everytime she’d ask me to go somewhere with her so I stopped hanging out with her.  She never invited my SO, and I’d get in her car and hers would be in there, ready to hang out with us.  It was always so weird because the guy is a jackass and made me really uncomfortable.

Post # 42
Member
891 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: December 2010

i have a girlfriend who is married and when i was single, we hung out once in a while (still do) and she would always ask me if it was cool if her husband went.  i thought it was cool that she asked and i never cared. it was actually nice when he came because he was our driver/drink buyer all night and would just sort of be there in the background letting us dance and drink and have fun and guys wouldn’t hit on us. he was totally cool. 

we called him the chaperone lol

The topic ‘Would this offend you: friend asking you to spend time without SO?’ is closed to new replies.

Find Amazing Vendors