(Closed) Would this propsal bother you?

posted 6 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
901 posts
Busy bee

At this point, you live together and have four children together. Isn’t it better to jus be happy to get the ball rolling on marriage? Some guys just aren’t romantic.

Post # 4
1578 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2013 - Country Club

I think that’s kind of sweet, actually. He remembered the ring you said you wanted, and got it for you. Some guys just are shy when expressing their feelings for each other.

Post # 5
5428 posts
Bee Keeper

You’re engaged, he doesn’t feel like the type that would get on bended knee. My Fiance wasn’t particularly romantic either, we bought the ring in the store, and I gave him my hand and he put it on… so what? I started PLANNING! weeeeeee!

Post # 6
285 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

As for someone who also had a strange engagement… (we just kind of “agreed” to get married one night), I can see what you mean by it not feeling like an actual proposal.  I’m not sure what kind of guy your Fiance is, but can you picture him putting on an act of grandeur, or does this seem like pretty typical behaviour from him?  I suppose also because you have been together quite awhile and have a family, maybe he thought he didn’t “need” to make a big deal out of it … not necessarily fair, but hey, he’s a dude, right?

I think overall, just focus on the fact that you are getting married to the man you love – over the years, the idea that you never had a perfect proposal will become less and less important. 

And as for the ring, if it’s the one you wanted, who cares what others think – mine is the same – it’s technically not even an engagement ring (sapphire stone with little diamonds surrounding it, and people think its a black diamond, haha). But I love it. And if you love yours, just rock it!!

Post # 7
9955 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: December 2012

For the record… Statistically there are more “non-Hollywood” Proposals than there are the down on one knee or UTube worthy variety Proposals.

Lets see… You got

1- The Man you LOVE

2- The LOVE and DEVOTION of the Father of your Children

3- The Ring you Want

4- A DATE and Wedding Plans in the making


5- A Non-Proposal Proposal (I too got one of those)

You should be Grateful and HAPPY… especially HAPPY you are going to Marry someone who LOVES you very very much.

There are a lot of women in the world, who don’t have any of the 5 things on the list above… or just 1 or 2 and HOPING that the others come along.


Post # 8
8455 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: April 2013

@missmorganista:  +1, I think it’s kinda sweet too.

Post # 9
3886 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

I can’t see being upset over the ring if it’s the ring you picked out. If people make snide comments over it not looking like a traditional ring, then just tell them you’re so happy that your fiance can think out of the box. Also if you were going ring-shopping together, to the point of you choosing the ring, I’d guess he felt like an engagement and marriage were already decided-on matters, and no need to make a big production out of popping the actual question. You were going to say yes— otherwise you’d not have picked out a ring— so the important part was already taken care of, and in those circumstances, some men (and women) don’t feel the need to make a big fuss over things.

I’d recommend you stop reading stories about hugely fancy proposals, and stop watching the reality shows where every proposal is really elaborate; that reinforces the mistaken impression that a proposal isn’t real unless it’s done on horseback at sunset with fireworks and doves. They may call them “reality shows” but most of them are just about as far from reality as you can get.

If you feel like there’s something missing since you didn’t get swept off your feet, tell your man how important romantic gestures are to you. For all you know, he’s making them every day but because he is a man and thinks like a man, you might not recognize them for what they are.   Also think of ways you can bring more romance into your day-to-day lives; plan a little getaway without the kids if you can, even if it’s just for an afternoon, and do small nice things for each other for no reason other than to show your love.

The proposal itself is just a few moments in time and nothing to fixate over; much better to focus your energy on building the kind of romance you seem to crave, and enjoying it for years.

Post # 10
2961 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

If you live together and have kids together, I would be more surprised by a romantic proposal than the one you got.

Post # 12
1695 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: March 2012

I also got a non proposal.  Do I sometimes wish that it had been more romantic?  Sure!  lol  But most days I’m just happy that we’re married and enjoy the other good moments we have. 

Post # 13
4951 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

I don’t think most proposals are all rainbows and unicorns. Most, from what I know of my own experience and friends’ experiences, are just simple. Who cares, enjoy the man that loves you and wants to spend his life with you!

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