Post # 1
My Fiance and I got engaged on Monday and announced it on FB. Everyone who knows us is over the moon for us. I then received a private message from a guy I used to go to college with when I was 19 (I am now 35). He and I haven’t really kept in touch except the odd comment on fb on status updates.
Have a look and see what you think:
Obviously showed Fiance and now both of us feel quite upset by it.
Post # 2
I would simply write back “thanks for your concern but our relationship is simply none of your business and we would appreciate you keeping your opinions to yourself in the future”
Post # 3
Don’t be upset by it. You said yourself that you aren’t really that close anymore so his opinion shouldn’t matter anyway 🙂
it is a bid weird though
Post # 4
nurseybee55 : I guess I don’t understand? Why are you and your fiancé upset by the unsolicited opinion of a casual acquaintance, you haven’t seen in 16 years, who obviously has some emotional baggage about relationships, and is apparently socially awkward/inappropriate? Ignore the message and move on with your life. If he continues to send unwanted messages ask him to stop or block him.
Post # 5
Opinions are like A**holes, everyone has one and they all stink.
So he showed himself to have a stinky one, obviously keeping his friendship isn’t worth the effort.
Post # 6
I would just ignore it. I certainly wouldn’t let it upset me.
Post # 7
It wouldn’t upset me…. Wouldn’t even be a blip on my radar
Post # 8
I agree with others in that I wouldn’t be upset over it. What does his opinion matter anyway? That said, it was bold of him to do and I probably would message back “Thank you for the Congrats. However, my relationship is really none of your concern. Please do not express your opinions of it to me. Thank you.”
Post # 9
That’s hilarious, roll your eyes and move on. congratulations on your engagement!
Post # 10
nurseybee55 : That’s a rude and jerkish comment.
But I don’t understand why you’re upset by it. Ignore it, possibly unfriend him, and move on. No matter what the situation, there’s always someone who says something rude.
And maybe he’s internally justifying why he’s lived with his partner for years but won’t propose??
Post # 11
I agree with all PP – there is a reason those who know you and Fiance are over the moon – they KNOW you.
This guy hasn’t seen you for well over a decade and thinks he has the right to question your relationship. This is one of the main things I’ve learned once I got engaged – take kind and loving advice of friends/family members into consideration, but the people that don’t know you or your Fiance or the relationship; let them go, you just can’t let them get to you. Otherwise you might end up questioning your relationship and every single word said by anyone will spark a little red light that is completely unnecessary.
Post # 12
What WestCoast5 said. I wouldn’t be upset. I would be curious what he had been through to make him so jaded. But, I wouldn’t care enough to ask.
Post # 13
He may be jealous, malicious, cynical, unimaginative, never touched by passion, an old stick-in-the-mud, and quite possibly cumudgeonly – and therefore to be pitied.
His choice of typeface says it all. Does he think that curly capital letters are any substitute for adventure and romance and love?
His idea of travel is probably sitting at home on an exercise bike while looking through google maps on his mobile.
I bet he wears paisley pyjamas and has a very poor taste in socks.
He probably regularly thumbs through his stamp collection, talks loudly and repeatedly about golf, and still has a little difficulty tying his own shoelaces.
In reality, his marriage has failed and he is clearly very badly hurt, enough to reject the whole concept of marriage. So although his message looks personal and aimed at you it isn’t really. So don’t be too mean with your response, just be firm, polite and unemotional. Then you need to block him in case he sends other similar messages because his misery does not give him permission to hurt you or negatively affect your happiness.
There, OP. Do you feel a little better now?
Post # 14
He’s looney tunes. I’d delete him ASAP.
Post # 15
What a pitiful person!
Tell him to mind his own business and delete him, girl!