(Closed) Would you be a surrogate? (To a family member/stranger/at all)

posted 8 years ago in Pregnancy
  • poll: Would you ever be a surrogate?
    Yes, but only for a family member/close friend NOT using my genetic material : (37 votes)
    29 %
    Yes, but only for a family member/close friend, even if it meant using my genetic material : (12 votes)
    9 %
    Yes, for anyone, including a stranger, but NOT using my genetic material : (7 votes)
    5 %
    Yes, for anyone, including a stranger, even if it meant using my genetic material : (6 votes)
    5 %
    No, under no circumstance : (61 votes)
    47 %
    Other- explanation below : (6 votes)
    5 %
  • Post # 3
    1729 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: June 2014

    Yes, I would. Definitely for a close friend and even for a stranger. For a stranger, I’d want to be compensated. I looked into being a gestational surrogate a few years ago. I was really excited about the idea.

    Post # 4
    607 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: October 2010

    I absolutely would for a sibling, probably for a very close friend, but not with my eggs. With my own eggs I’d feel too attached, and watching them grow up it would be hard to separate, for me. Also, only after I am done having kids. 

    Post # 5
    204 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: September 2011

    Oohhh…tough question! I think I would (at least I would consider it) for a family member or a very close friend. My preference would be to not use my own genetic material, but I would consider doing so. I think it would be horribly difficult to carry a baby and fall in love with that unborn LO and know that you have to give them up. But, I’ve also seen friends struggle for years with infertility and being able to give them the gift of a child would also be amazing.

    Post # 6
    3175 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: May 2012

    I would definitely do it for a family member/close friend with their own eggs/sperm. Like the PP, if it were my egg, I would feel attached as the child grew up. But, for a family member or friend, I could do something great for them, and get to be involved with the child as an auntie, which I would love.

    Post # 7
    4038 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: October 2010

    I’d like to say I could, but I’m really not sure I’d be able to carry a child to term and then give him/her up. If someday I thought I could handle it, it would have to be someone I was very close to, and not using my eggs. 

    Post # 8
    5654 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: April 2011

    I’d have to say definitely not.

    Being pregnant when it’s your own is hard enough. If it didn’t effect every part of your life then maybe, but already being a mom & having to keep up with the kiddo & keep my marriage strong (including the intimacy dept) it would be a whole family issue and not just my own body issue.

    Post # 9
    5827 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: May 2011

    I would not. I don’t have a sister and neither does Darling Husband. I can’t see myself doing it for my brother’s (theoretical) wife or my best friend. I would feel bad if someone close to me could not conceive but I know it would never cross my mind to offer to carry their child. I can barely get my head around carrying my own child let alone someone else’s.

    Post # 10
    5993 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: May 2010

    god no – me pregnant, if im going to that to my body i might as well keep it

    now women who are surrogates – wow, im in AWE of those ladies!

    Post # 11
    1116 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: August 2008

    I would definitely surrogate for my sister, barring any complications in my current pregnancy, but that’s probably it.  But I wouldn’t be inseminated or an egg donor in that same scenario.  And I honestly would request only a single embryo transfer if IVF, or no ovarian stimluation if IUI.  I love my twins, but there are way more risks to the mom with multiples, that I wouldn’t be able to justify, especially having a family of my own to look after.

    Post # 12
    5091 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: January 2012

    Nope.  I have some health issues, and any time I get pregnant, it will automatically be a high-risk pregnancy.  I am worried right now about being able to have a baby at all.  I wouldn’t want to give someone else hope, only to have my body explode, causing me even more issues and killing their poor unborn baby.  🙁

    Post # 13
    2414 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: September 2012

    I would be willing to do it but would definately want financial compensation…I think it’s an incredibly selfless thing to do and would be happy to help someone achieve their goal of being parents, family or stranger.

    Post # 14
    7605 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper

    I would not do this.  My health is important to me for so many reasons, and I feel that there are lots of other options available to couples these days.  Sorry if that sounds oversimplified.

    Post # 15
    448 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: December 2010

    I would only do it for a very close friend or one of DH’s siblings. And only if Darling Husband and I were already done having our children and not using my genetic material. There are risks with every pregnancy and if we hadn’t had children and there were complications… I couldn’t handle that.

    Post # 16
    1212 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: December 2012

    I would be a surrogate for my sister, and maybe my best friend if she needed it. I’d let my sister use my eggs if she needed to, because genetically that would be the option closest to her.

    I considered being a surrogate for my dad’s cousin’s wife who I am pretty close to, they have been trying for 15 years and had 16 IVF cycles, 4 1st tri miscarriages and 2 2nd tri miscarriages. But I would like to have at least one of my own children first, and the surrogacy laws here are impossible.

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