(Closed) Would you be mad if your BM cut her hair?

posted 8 years ago in Bridesmaids
  • poll: Would you care if your BM cut her hair so she couldn't have an updo?
    No, absolutely not! It's her hair! : (137 votes)
    79 %
    Yes, but I wouldn't say anything. : (3 votes)
    2 %
    Yes, and I would be pissed. : (2 votes)
    1 %
    Only if she pulled a Britney and shaved her head. : (31 votes)
    18 %
  • Post # 3
    8353 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper
    • Wedding: March 2011

    My girls already have short hair, but on their own, they have decided to grow it out for the wedding. I know they look great both ways, but if they had really long hair and they got it cut short right before the wedding, I would be sad because I would already be envisioning my wedding pictures with the way their hair was when I asked them. I would definately tell them that I was sad about it, but it is ultimately their hair, so they should be able to do what they want with it.

    Post # 4
    5655 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: April 2011

    I think it’s your hair and you should be able to cut it… I mean I wouldn’t do an extreme dye job or anything but really I don’t think i’d care at all.

    Post # 5
    714 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: July 2010

    That cut is super cute.  Personally, I wouldn’t mind if one of my girls cut her hair, but I would probably still like if they got their hair done on the day of the wedding (professionally).  Even if you aren’t doing an updo I think a stylist can usually give a more polished/formal look.  However, if you think your cousin is going to be up set, maybe you should talk to her about it first…but I don’t think she should get final say about what YOU do with YOUR hair!  Maybe just give her a heads up that you are going to do it.

    Post # 6
    605 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: July 2010

    My cousin’s best man got a mohawk before his wedding. Short of that or dying it a neon color, I don’t think anything you do to your hair is your cousin’s concern. The style you showed will look adorable on you, by the way. I say ‘go for it.’ You shouldn’t give her a vote unless you’re truly OK with her saying ‘please don’t do it,’ and it doesn’t sound like you are.

    Post # 7
    1129 posts
    Bumble bee

    Soooo… confession.  I would be mad and AM mad.  LOL  I know, bad bride, bad bride.

    My Maid/Matron of Honor (who is in the military) made a big production about how she wouldn’t cut her hair before my wedding – I never said anything to her about it.  She took it upon herself to promise me she would suffer and wear a bun…  and then without saying anything in advance, whacked it off into what I find to be a really unflattering haircut.  I hate the cut on her; its seriously short and she has never had short hair like that.  She did it for ease while she was in officer basic training – which I get – but still…  I thought it was a little rude.

    My immediate reaction was to be seriously pissed although I’ve not said anything to her about it.  She knows I’m mad, I know she doesn’t give a sh*t what I think.  And my being mad is less about her hair and more about the fact that she couldn’t care less – not jsut about hair but about many things wedding related up to now.

    So back to you – Have you had your hair that short before? 

    Post # 8
    988 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: August 2010

    I wouldn’t mind at all but some brides like the matchy matchy look and if all the other BMs have long hair and she wanted all of you to wear your hair the same then I think she would be upset. In any case I think you should ask 🙂

    Post # 10
    4123 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: October 2010

    OK, I was going to vote No, I don’t care, but I’m sorry, that last option was too tempting 😉

    Post # 11
    513 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: October 2010

    I guess I would be concerned if she shaved her head bald in a moment of crazed mental status. But I don’t think anyone will care the BM’s don’t have matching hairstyles. At least she didn’t dye it purple with green dots. lol.

    Post # 12
    1398 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: May 2011

    Has she specifically said she wants everyone to get an updo? Has hair even been discussed? If it hasn’t, I say go for it. My Maid/Matron of Honor has a more extreme version of the haircut youre getting (its super short in the back) but I would never dictate that she has to grow it out. But I’m much more lax about my BMs, I just want them to feel comfortable.

    Post # 13
    1129 posts
    Bumble bee

    @Boston Bee:  Well… I’d say you should at least give her the courtesy of telling her.  If you’ve had the cut before then it’s not an unknown for her (in my case, Maid/Matron of Honor cut it 4 or 5 inches shorter than I’d ever seen it and I’ve known her since we were 6).  DId you see @hotchild’s post about her PWC?  My Maid/Matron of Honor is this short too.


    Honestly, I’d ask your cousin.  Three months isn’t forever, and wouldn’t you want the same kind of courtesy if it were your wedding?

    OH and regarding the not telling her and that feeling kind of sneaky?  In my opinion, it is.  That sneaky-ness is what made me most upset with my Maid/Matron of Honor.

    Post # 14
    1391 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: September 2010

    I think it’s ridiculous to even have to ASK if you should have to worry about someone else being upset about YOUR hair. I guess I am different, cause I really don’t care how the girls do their hair a couple will have it up and then another girl is doing her’s down. I just want them to be comfortable! Besides their hair isn’t why I chose them to be BMs! 

    Also I think that cut is SUPER cute and if you do it you have to post a pic!! 🙂

    Post # 15
    3098 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: November 2009

    OMG NO.

    I didn’t own her or her head. Geez, she was in my wedding for one freakin’ day, what in the world does that have to do with what she wants to do with her hair the other 364 days of the year? Seriously, my BM’s hair was the last of my concerns on my wedding day.

    Post # 16
    4765 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: January 2011 - Vintage Villas

    I wouldn’t care AT ALL! It’s not my hair! 

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