(Closed) Would you be mad??

posted 9 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
6661 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: May 2010

Hi! I’m assuming you’re engaged and the date is set? Did your Future Sister-In-Law know that’s where you wanted to get married? I’m sorry she stole your thunder..

Post # 4
Member
118 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: May 2018

I would be really hurt too and super pissed!! I can kind of relate as I got engaged first and Future Sister-In-Law saw my ring (didn’t even congratulate me) and then her Boyfriend or Best Friend gave her the same ring when he proposed!! I will admit I was (and still am) furious!!

Post # 5
Member
197 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: December 2009

Oh yah, I would be upset. For sure. Can you have your fiance talk to her? I think it would be best if he was the one communicating in this sticky situation. Obviously, you two can’t have weddings on back to back weekends. You were engaged first, you should get to choose your date first.

Post # 6
Member
46 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: November 2008

Assuming she knew the date and location of your wedding, it’s TOTALLY wrong what she did.  You could be the bigger person and just let it go, OR (since you don’t have any deposits down) change the date and book your wedding the week before hers. 

Either way, I’d keep any future wedding plans under wraps.

Post # 7
Member
46 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: November 2008

The other thing that’s notable about her decision is that assuming she takes a standard honeymoon, doesn’t that mean she won’t be able to go to her brother’s wedding?  That’s pretty rude.

Post # 8
Member
3162 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

EW I’d be soooooo pissed. If she knew the deets on your wedding, she needs to change her date AND her venue. That is beyond rude. If she didn’t know then you still might try to have a conversation with her about changing her plans, but if she’s got deposits down and you don’t you’re pretty much forced to change your plans, which really sucks but if you don’t have anything actually reserved and she does then, sadly, she’s got the upper hand in the situation. 

Post # 9
Member
141 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

im confused-you said you hadnt put deposits down after two years, but she booked the weekend before and the place??  were you penciled in there or something?

Post # 10
Member
36 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: September 2008

I am also a bit confused too.  You didn’t book the venue yet? 

I agree that it totally sucks that she did what she did… BUT….

 

#1 – if you didn’t book it, then sorry, but it’s up for grabs

#2 – as they say in SATC – you get a DAY, not a year, not a month, not a week.  A DAY.

That being said, I would be pissed too.  I can’t imagine things will be all that friendly between the two of you, but at least she didn’t snag your actual day.  I would keep all future plans under wraps

Post # 11
Member
512 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2009

WOW – That’s just a bitchy ass thing for her to do. Even if it wasnt consecutive weekends, I would be pissed if someone had the same venue as me within the same family. However, she is your sister in law, so it’s not like you share the same family – however, his family will be going to the same place twice.

That’s just F-D UP! Have you talked to her about it – how did your fiancees mom not see a problem with offering the house to her the weekend before yours – I get its her daughter, but didnt she know you were having it there? And Future Sister-In-Law knew as well?

If I were you b/c I would be super pissed and thinking people would be bored of the venue after already attending a wedding there the weekend before – I would look for another venue or confront her about it (although i doubt she’ll change b/c its her mom’s house) however its your fiancees mom’s house and its his wedding and thats her son – so he has the same right.

Not cool at all.

Post # 12
Member
1883 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

What does FI’s mother say about all of this?

Post # 13
Member
6661 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: May 2010

Flaimingred- good point! Why is FI’s mom allowing this? Sounds like you had everything set, and she should be at least slightly concerned about your feelings!

Post # 14
Member
1490 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: December 1969

Same place, one week earlier? So not okay.

Post # 15
Member
2015 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2009

Your Future Sister-In-Law is totally in the wrong. I would NEVER do that to a family member, or even a friend. I understand that brides don’t get a week, or a month … they get a day, but honestly, when much of the same family is involved, the polite thing to do would have been to one, let you have your wedding first, and two, either have her wedding at the same location several months later, or pick a different venue for a wedding a few months after yours.

I’m sorry, hun. That’s really awful.

Post # 16
Member
563 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2009

It is a LOT of work to host a wedding at your home, and I can’t understand why anyone would want to do that two weekends in a row.  

The only thing I can imagine happening is that since you switched the date and did not book any of the vendors for the new date, perhaps your Mother-In-Law did not think you were certain about the new date.  Even if that is what she was thinking, she absolutely should have called you to check the status of your plans when her daughter decided to have a similar wedding.  

What does your Fiance think about all of this?  Since it is his family that is behaving very insensitively, it really should be his responsibility to talk to them to see what is happening if he agrees with you. 

The topic ‘Would you be mad??’ is closed to new replies.

Find Amazing Vendors