(Closed) Would you be ok with FMIL wearing this to your wedding? I’m trying to be…

posted 8 years ago in Etiquette
  • poll: Would you be ok with FMIL wearing this to your wedding?
    Yes, it's fine : (57 votes)
    21 %
    No, it's inappropriate : (220 votes)
    79 %
  • Post # 57
    Member
    1641 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: May 2011

    I think it’s innappropriate, but wouldn’t say anything about it. My Mother-In-Law worn something that was more for an evening wedding for our late morning/afternoon ceremony/reception. And yes, it looks kind of funny in the photos, but whatever. She felt great that day and it shows in the photos of her.

    Post # 59
    Member
    139 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: September 2011

    no way!!! she should be respectful of her son and YOU since it is YOUR day and wear something better than that!! this is not a picnic.. this his her son’s wedding!! I know when my son (if i have one lol) gets married I will be FLY!!! lol so no.. i wuld not take that….. not at all.. that is horrible!!!

    Post # 60
    Member
    142 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: January 2013

    @SandyThePoet: (and @ many others that have the same response) thats what i would do. shopping trip with my mom or maybe one of FH aunts or someone in the family.

    my Future Mother-In-Law dosent really have a wardrobe due to money and she never really bothers to dress nice either (not out of spite though…more out of depression sadly). so i figure it would be nice if my mom and i took her out shopping. really would like to do that for her and to help her be involved. figure it would cheer her up and give her a reason to look good…not just cause she going to a wedding but because we took the time to help her….sometimes people that want attention look for it the wrong way…maybe shes wearing that to get attention….but if you give attention to her before hand in a positive way (like by shopping with her)it will be different. and maybe she doesnt know bette… any way i think a good shopping trip brightens any ladies day 😀

    Post # 61
    Member
    2050 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: October 2011

    @jeanie13: Does she just not care or is she just not educated in fashion sense to begin with…or both? Whichever the case, I don’t think I’d take her on a shopping trip but rather, bring the shopping trip to her. Bring her special occasion clothes you already bought, tags still on, and say, “Pick one you, crazy pants suit lady! Whichever you pick is my gift to you to wear on the wedding day!” Return the others. 

    Post # 62
    Member
    4653 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: August 2013

    I agree with @Cornflakegirl: If you have the money to do it i think this woud be the BEST option!

    Post # 63
    Member
    570 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: July 2012

    @jeanie13: Jeanie chant this “God gives me obstacles sometimes… called mother-in-laws”Laughing

    Also, let her wear what she wants, I believe this lady is doing this to irritate you and she is winning the battle.  I have my own battle going on over here … or maybe I should say “My mother in law has a battle going” She is verbally abusive towards me and my husband (her son) but we kill her with kindness and silence. It pisses her off more. Boy she does not understand that after 5 years of working with a district full of high school kids that believe they are part of the “dangerous mind movie” if I can beat a kid at his game with silence and not ranting than she is no match for me.  I tune her out.  

    Don’t let her see that you are upset smile, laugh, and be act happy. Then when she is not around yell, scream, curse whatever you want on the weddingbee.

    Post # 64
    Member
    570 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: July 2012

    @creativeplannertobee: You are halirious , that is what I do at our family functions. She is is all smiling and than I only get the picture to where the person is next to her. Hey I am the photographer and that is a big blemish I see and I have to crop it out.

    Post # 65
    Member
    714 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: October 2011

    HELL NO! White is for the bride and SHE KNOWS that I am sure. EVERYONE knows that! I told my mother and Future Mother-In-Law what color to wear and said have at it.

    Post # 66
    Hostess
    11165 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper

    @jeanie13: Oh goodness that is way too casual! I completely agree it would bother me a great deal, especially for an evening wedding.

    We are putting on our invitations “Formal Attire Requested” as his family has a tendency to wear jeans/khakis or Hawaiian shirts to every occassion. I told him to make it clear to anyone who asks that this type of clothing is not appropriate and the wedding is very formal.

    Can you perhaps mention it to your Fiance since it is his mom? I would think that she might take criticism from him a bit better.

    Post # 67
    Member
    15 posts
    Newbee
    • Wedding: August 2011

    I feel your pain! And I’m sorry you’ve been plagued with this woman as your MIL! I’m having similiar issues with my FMIL! First it was a white dress and now it’s a prom dress that’s fancier and more flamboyant than anything I’ve seen on a vegas showgirl! I keep telling myself the same thing. In the end she will be the one who looks like a fool! Hang in there! I know from experience that asking her to be more considerate will only cause more drama!

    Post # 68
    Member
    77 posts
    Worker bee

    @jeanie13:  when I first opened this, i expected it to be some gorgeous attention seeking white or extremly sparkly dress/stylish suit – but it is a hideous, and highly unfashionable granny suit (it has an elastic belt…eww?) that is obviously inappropriate for the occasion (IMO). I think that you have two options – let her go ahead with the outfit and embarrass herself – after all you will look absolutely GORGEOUS!!! or, if this option bothers you, perhaps you can explain to her that you feel the outfit is inappropriate for such and such reasons, and encourage her to wear something more suitable. 

    GOOD LUCK HONEY!!! update us when you can… xox

     

    Post # 69
    Member
    437 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: October 2012

    I like the idea someone posted about getting your mom involved. It may not work, but it’s worth a shot.

    Post # 71
    Member
    5789 posts
    Bee Keeper

    Great! There’s still hope!! 🙂

    The topic ‘Would you be ok with FMIL wearing this to your wedding? I’m trying to be…’ is closed to new replies.

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