(Closed) Would you be okay with using a cake topper that you wont see until the day of?

posted 4 years ago in Food
Post # 3
343 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

First, do you have a theme and does she know it? If not buy a backup. Ask her to email a pic

Post # 5
7561 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: January 2013

I would ask her to describe it and buy a back up if you’re worried.

If she’s anything like my grandma it’s probably a traditional porcelain couple like this – 

Are you into that?

Post # 6
343 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

@MrsWinTraining2014:  Ask her to try to explain it to you or guide you to where it is online. Then always bring the backup. Who knows hers might get broken en route and you need to keep yourself prepared.

Post # 7
525 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

Awww- I think if my grandma bought me something- I’d probably use it regardless- but I don’t care much about the cake topper and am likely having a raunchy one. 

If you have a specific idea about what you’d like, and it doesn’t sound like what grandma got (assuming she can describe it, even if you can’t see a pic) then get a new one. If you hate hers- just use yours and say that the caterers mixed them up and you had given them yours as a backup

Post # 8
681 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

@MrsWinTraining2014:  I wouldn’t worry about it, and let grandma do her thing. The reality is, in the grand scheme of things, it’s just the cake topper. 🙂 She wants to do something special for you. At worst, it won’t be your style, but won’t be offensive. Let go, and let her feel like she’s helping. 🙂

Post # 9
4035 posts
Honey bee

@MrsWinTraining2014:  Can she take a photo with a film camera, print it and mail it to you? Otherwise, as other PPs have suggested, maybe she can at least describe it to you and you could buy a back up.


Post # 11
1088 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2014

Well, if it doubles as a gift and you know about it ahead of time, how could you not use it?  So, don’t buy a backup. There’s no way not to use the one she got and not hurt her feelings. It’s not like you’ll use it another time in the future. 

Post # 12
720 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

You should try to get a picture of it from her and be ready to have a nice response if you hate it, and suggest something else for her to pick out for you so that she still has a say. If she’s tech savvy, maybe have a nice Skype session so that she feels good and loved and less offended if you say no! Then again, only you know your grandma – I have a family that tells each other when we hate gifts, so I wouldn’t worry too much about being sensitive, but maybe yours isn’t like that…

Post # 13
1999 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2015

I wouldn’t mind it and would use it even if it ended up not being my taste at all. It’s obviously important to your grandmother but it’s not a huge wedding item like your dress or venue so I think you could afford to just “close one eye” if you don’t like it and do something that will make your grandma happy. 


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