(Closed) Would you be pissed? I certainly am!

posted 5 years ago in Family
Post # 3
Member
2808 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

your Future Father-In-Law sounds like a dumbass. i’d be pissed too. they’re being dumb. but, sometimes, you have to choose your battles. would you rather fight with them over this and risk pissing them off even more? or would you rather just let it go and have a good time, and try to ignore their cheap-ness?

also, not to make this any less of a “MY FIL’S ARE CHEAP ASSES!” rant. but maybe they’re tapped out because of her wedding? if they’re paying for her wedding, they could be tight on cash. and not every dress at kleinfeld is ridiculously expensive. they sell maggie sottero dresses there, and maggie’s are about average in price for wedding gowns.

Post # 4
Hostess
2556 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

I would probably be pissed, too.  Have you brought this up with you FI?  WHat does he think?

Post # 5
Member
885 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2009
Post # 7
Member
885 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2009

I dunno… maybe I just do not put that much into weddings, but I feel like one should get married with zero expectations as to what others will be willing to do/offer.   I find that expecting nothing usually saves a lot of angst and trouble.  The one thing that would bother me would be them trying to put more work on my family.  

Post # 8
Member
9053 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2010

I would just flat out say no to that idea.  As if your parents don’t have enough to do the day before hosting a wedding without having to clean up from a rehearsal dinner the night before.  I’d want to be cleaning my house a bit at time the week before and then leaving it untouched as much as possible.  Not to mention it’s incredibly rude to just assume that you can throw a party at someone else’s house without speaking to them about it directly.

 

As for the champagne, I guess 10 bottles is more than they have to give you, but I’d inquire about possibly purchasing the additional 14 bottles from them at cost so there’s enough for everyone.

 

Post # 9
Member
9115 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: December 2012

Your fiance’s parents are not obligated to give you anything for your wedding.

Is it kind of them to do so? Absolutely. But parents are not required to give anything to their children’s weddings.

Post # 11
Member
748 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: April 2014

You could just say that your parents don’t feel comfortable with that considering the set up for the wedding the next day.

Post # 13
Member
3718 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

@SapphireSun:  Exactly this. Sory it isn’t going well. I would also allow your Fiance to handle all of the conversations with them and not to put it on you.

Post # 15
Member
644 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

@AngelR88:  I agree 110%  Low expectations of what people will contribute financially yields low disappointment.  We are insisting that our parents contribute NOTHING.  Which they aren’t happy with and I’m actually interested in seeing what they will do about it.  We will stick to our word even though we could REALLY use the money.  Fight it, fight it.

 

I guess it’s too late to reset your expectations meter but try to just focus on your fiance and how lucky you are to be with him.  I think your Future In-Laws are being rude but just try to be a gracious bride and look like a classy woman.  Have a lovely wedding Smile

 

 

 

Post # 16
Member
2863 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

I know they aren’t obligated to help but yeah I’d be pissed too. 

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