(Closed) Would you date a guy with "Baby Mama Drama"?

posted 4 years ago in Relationships
Post # 2
Member
2925 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: April 2017

I couldn’t date a guy that had baby mama drama.  There’s too many guys out there that don’t, so why would I waste my time and energy?

Post # 3
Member
2076 posts
Buzzing bee

No, I could never date a guy who is constantly having drama, issues, fights, etc with his ex.  I understand that when a person has a child the other parent will always be in their life, but there is a difference when the two are cordial and when the two are always fighting.  Because more then not the partner who is not involved at all (meaning the SO to the person who has the ex and kid) will always be drug into the argument at some point.  Sorry, but that is not my cup of tea.

But then again, there are people out there who thrive on drama and would happily date a person who is always having ex issues.

Post # 4
Member
7414 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2014

I wouldn’t date a guy with baby mama drama, nor a guy with can’t keep a job drama, lost my drivers license drama, or pretty much any stupid shit drama. If a guy made a baby with someone else and they can tolerate each other and he pays his fair share of what it takes to raise the kid, then yep, that’s fine.

Post # 5
Member
401 posts
Helper bee

My younger sister deals with this and I just could not. Her boyfriend (and baby daddy) has two children with his ex, and because he’s a hippie who likes to avoid the Man just like my little sister (who doesn’t even have a bank account) he never filed official custody/support paperwork and just gave her money when she dropped the kids off. 

Later, she purposely sent support documents to the wrong address so he would miss his date and was arrested and put in jail. Now he owes her 29k of back child support (that he paid but there’s no proof because it was all cash), and an astronomical monthly amount. 

My sister is always dealing with trying to help raise these two kids, and resentment because the financial issues caused by this ex result in my sister’s daughter with this guy not having all the things she wants to do for her. 

It’s a nightmare and it would be an immediate deal breaker for me (before I ever had the chance to get pregnant by someone with that drama). I would be out the second I heard any of it.

Post # 6
Member
9159 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2013

nope. 

Post # 7
Member
5161 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: January 2010

Ha ha, no. 

Life is too short, and there are way too many drama-free options, for that. 

Of course, I am childfree and would not date a man with kids in first place but my answer goes for any kind of drama, honestly.

But I agree with freckles071611 that there are people out there who seem to thrive on that kind of thing and being able to pit themselves against the ex, have their partner “prove” themselves to them, and all of that. Those people need therapy.

Post # 8
Member
3093 posts
Sugar bee

Uhhh no.

The guy I am dating now is in his early 40s and kids are grown. No drama whatsoever.

I have two young kids, no drama whatsoever (not even a little bit)

So why would I sign up for a man with unresolved ex issues? And lots of times, the drama happens because the guy cant set boundaries appropriately. If you have drama, you allow drama.

Post # 9
Member
239 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: November 2016

Nope can’t deal with it and especially since it’s not my drama don’t want to be involved in it

Post # 11
Member
6526 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: September 2013

desertgypsy:  nope, sorry. i know it sucks because there guys out there who are probably awesome but the drama his crazy ex causes makes it not worth it.

my sister is actually in a relationship with a guy who has two kids and not only is the ex crazy but so are the kids. The mother bad mouths their father to them so they have no respect for my sister and their father.

Post # 12
Hostess
3828 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: November 2016

I casually dated a guy like that knowing from the start that it was a terrible idea, and it ended up being more of a terrible idea than I even expected. NOPE for me on that front.

Post # 13
Member
4111 posts
Honey bee

desertgypsy: no, I would not date someone with a crazy ex. I don’t have time for childish bullshit. 

Post # 14
Member
558 posts
Busy bee

At this point, I wouldn’t even date a guy who has a child, baby momma drama or not. In a couple of years that might be different (minus baby momma drama).

Post # 15
Member
122 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: May 2016

One of my friend is dating a guy who has baby mama drama and all i can say is thank God I don’t have to deal with that. She is going to be dealing with that drama for 18+ years so I’m glad my fiance doesn’t have that kind of drama in his life.

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