(Closed) Would you do this for your MIL?

posted 8 years ago in Married Life
Post # 3
Member
9053 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2010

Short answer, is yes, I probably would do it.  Darling Husband and I enjoy a good car ride, and are usually willing to do favours for our families because they do even more for us.

But, it definitely sounds like you guys have some background stuff going on that needs to be worked out.

Post # 4
Member
1398 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

Yikes! You seem to have a little resentment built up here. Here’s what I feel-To answer-yes, do this favor, go along for the ride or drive. think of it as time to get to know your your new sister-in-law. (Someday, you may need her to babysit-or worse, take in your Mother-In-Law in her old age-build up the brownie points now!) 

This is not just his family, anymore. This is now your family, too. Treat it the same way you would if it were your own mother, or sister, asking this favor of you. Even if you think its stupid, and a waste of your time, in the end you will be doing a good thing. Plus you get to have your guy to yourself on the drive back, and that can be a romantic drive if you let it be.

Post # 6
Member
1986 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

Side note: If she’s 15 then she might as well stick it out for Gold Award.  As well as Girl Scouts isn’t just about selling cookies- it enforces helping out the community, volunteer work, and helping younger girls out as well as being a social activity.  Girl Scouts goes all the way up to Senior year- she isn’t getting too old for it.  

Post # 7
Member
4824 posts
Honey bee

OK, I am passive aggresive probably.  I would say no thanks, I wont ride with you and I have plans for MY car that he cant drive.  I would tell him upfront that I dont trust his car that far and to tell his parents that he cant drive his sister because its not reliable and we cant afford to fix it or tow it. End of Story.

Post # 9
Member
2561 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

I wouldn’t do it either … they need to make better arrangements for their daughter, 4-5 hours of driving just to play taxi is not my idea of a fun weekend.

Post # 10
Member
446 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

There shouldn’t be an expectation that you play taxi, on your dime and at your cost. Sure it would be nice for you to do it, and I probably would ONLY if there was not a feeling of entitlement by your Mother-In-Law or your husband or his sister. Once that enters the picture, all bets are off and I would NOT do it as a matter of principle.

One question – what does Darling Husband stand for? Something Husband?

Post # 11
Member
1317 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

Ouch! I would be annoyed too and I would put my food down and say, “sorry, I had plans”.

Post # 12
Member
634 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

I dont get along with my Future Mother-In-Law at all and she is also very manipulative and bossy so I understand your position. Considering your Mother-In-Law doesnt help you out very much I would say no, dont do the favour for her. I wouldnt let your Darling Husband use your car either.

BUT, if you want to have a better relationship with your Mother-In-Law then this may be a good time to extend the olive branch?

Post # 13
Member
4770 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

@futuremrskelsey:

Darling Husband = Darling husband

Hmmm interesting situation.  You are married but yet it seems that you want to keep everyhting seperate.  His money is your money now and your money is his.  Paying you back for the honeymoon just sounds ridiculous.

If Darling Husband said he would drive his sis, let him drive his sis, stay out of it. Enjoy some alone time.

Post # 14
Member
10287 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2011

It seems like you have alot of issues with both your Darling Husband and his family. 

To answer your question, yes, I would make the drive because they are your family and thats what you do.

Post # 15
Member
2239 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

I probably would…this time at least. Can you make your husband drive your car? At least that way he can’t sleep the whole way there and back…And tell him to ask them for gas money too.

Post # 16
Member
739 posts
Busy bee

I would probably ask my Darling Husband for the parents to pay for a rental car and tell them you don’t think either of your cars are reliable enough. The least they can do it pay for gas.

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