(Closed) Would you donate your eggs?

posted 7 years ago in Pregnancy
  • poll: Would you donate your eggs?
    Yes : (86 votes)
    43 %
    No : (106 votes)
    52 %
    Other (see below) : (10 votes)
    5 %
  • Post # 17
    Member
    10649 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: January 2011

    I would do it for my sister.  In your situation though, I would ask about if they considered sperm donation first.  It’s easier and less risky!

    Post # 18
    Member
    607 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: October 2010

    I think it is a beautiful thing to do for your sister, but honestly it would be too weird for me. It may be because we are TTC now so my view is different, but I couldn’t help but think of the child as sort of mine. I  think it would be easier since you aren’t at that point in your life. I think you should do a lot of research but it could work out wonderfully for your family.

    Post # 19
    Member
    1660 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: October 2011

    I would totally do this for my sister and I know she would do it for me. I agree though that if your Brother-In-Law has a brother who could donate sperm, that would be a lot easier. I think it’s very kind and selfless of you to consider doing this, but if after further consideration you decide it’s not for you, you shouldn’t feel guilty about not doing it. It’s a very personal decision! Best to you and your family. I will keep your sister in my thoughts and prayers… I cannot imagine the heartbreak of carrying 3 pregnancies for 3 months each and having to terminate. ๐Ÿ™

    Post # 20
    Bee
    6474 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: June 2011 - Sydney, Australia

    I would donate for a friend/family member – but not sure that I would do it anonymously. Not that mine are much use anyway.. dodgy eggs. ๐Ÿ™

    Post # 21
    Member
    3355 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: May 2012

    the only issue I have with this is my getting over the idea that there are little half mes out there. technically they’re my children, and that terrifies me.

    I would probably do it for a relative though, but I wouldn’t offer.

    Post # 22
    Member
    13095 posts
    Honey Beekeeper
    • Wedding: July 2010

    I definitely couldn’t do this for a stranger.  I don’t think I could get past the though that I’d have a biological child in the world that I didn’t know.

    If my sister needed it, I’d consider it.  But I’d probably go to therapy before committing because again, I’m not sure how I’d handle knowing that my niece/nephew was biologically mine.

    Post # 23
    Member
    756 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: June 2011

    I’m really not sure if I would do this for a relative or not. Even though I don’t plan on having children, I think it would be uncomfortable to watch a relative raise a child that has my DNA. (On the other hand, I might actually like to see the child grow up and have a relationship with him/her without having the responsibilities of parenting.)

    I would absolutely donate anonymously and have seriously considered it in the past. But Darling Husband is uncomfortable with the idea, and I respect that, so I won’t be doing it.

    Post # 24
    Member
    3623 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: September 2012

    @windmills:  Yeah, I’d almost rather do it for a stranger than a family member. At least with a  stranger, I wouldn’t have the pang of “omg that is my child” every time I see them (because I wouldn’t see them).

    Post # 25
    Member
    2522 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: December 2012

    For a sister (if I had one), I don’t know.

    But, and I know this sounds horrible and selfish, I don’t want a complete stranger having one of my babies. I know there are women out there that would love to have a child of their own and can’t, and it breaks my heart, but I just couldn’t do it. It would honestly break my heart knowing someone else was raising my child.

    I have a friend who took one of our mutual friend’s baby boys when he was born because their family grew too big and they couldn’t afford it. Our mutual friend seemed completely fine seeing her child every day being raised by our friend, etc. I couldn’t do that. It would ruin me. ๐Ÿ™

    Just let me have my babies. ๐Ÿ™

    Post # 26
    Member
    4047 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: January 2014

    @windmills:  Agreed. I’ve considered doing it anonymously. I wouldn’t carry the child, and I would never have contact, so I don’t know that I would think much of it. I’m just helping a family have a child of their own, even if shares my DNA.

    But to donate for a family member and to watch the child grow up… that feels weird to me. I think I would have issues actually watching someone raise a child who is biologically mine.

    So bottom line – I’d need to be removed from the situation in order to donate.

    Post # 27
    Member
    1309 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: August 2012

    I was planning on donating when we decided to TTC, so if I wasn’t using my eggs at the moment I would be donating right now.

    Post # 28
    Member
    204 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: October 2012

    This is such a tricky situation, but I agree with a pp when she suggested going to counseling first (which might already be part of the process perhaps?) to make sure that the emotional side of this is something you’re ready for and will be able to handle in the future.  However for a sister who is going through something like that, I think it’s something I’d strongly consider.

    This sounds like an odd question, but how did your sister and BIL find out that they have a recessive gene for CF?  A cousin of mine has CF and I was just curious how testing initally happens? 

    Post # 29
    Member
    11744 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: November 1999

    without a doubt yes! I’d do anything for my sisters. In your situation since sperm donation may be an option id go that route first personally as its less invasive and less expensive I imagine. 

    i would probably not donate to strangers though – maybe for the $ if I was in a horribly tough spot and had to feed my family though. 

    I would be honored to give such a amazing gift to my sister though. 

    A friend of mine is a twin. Her mom gave her twin sister to her aunt (moms sister) who was unable to have children of her own. It’s such a touching story and the ultimate sacrifice and act of love. 

     

    Post # 30
    Member
    5005 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: October 2018

    I’m kinda torn, but I think I’d do it for my own sister. I’d need therapy afterwards, but I’d (probably) do it for her. 

    Post # 31
    Member
    3198 posts
    Sugar bee

    I wouldn’t do it for family, I don’t think I could watch my child be raised by someone I knew. I think I could do it for a stranger though…

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