(Closed) Would you expect meat from a vegetarian couple?

posted 9 years ago in Food
Post # 92
604 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: February 2014

Nah. I eat meat and I sometimes have vegetarian meals. Considering I DO eat veg I fail to see what the problem is. I find it bizarre that people live solely off meat, bizarre and incredibly unhealthy.

@Nicoley1985:  Being a vegetarian is by no means ALWAYS a choice. Would you expect someone to eat beef if their religion prohibits it or if they are allergic to it? Would you expect people who haven’t eaten meat for years to eat it even though it may make them ill? No, I’m sorry – not always a choice. Eating meat exclusively, however, is ALWAYS a choice, and according to what I know about diet – a very bad one.


Post # 93
13915 posts
Honey Beekeeper

No, I would not be offended and it would not be appropriate to be offended.  It is always the perogative of the host to plan his or her menu.  There are plenty of meatless dishes a meat eater can eat.  

Post # 94
269 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

It sounds like you are vegetarians for ideological reasons (rather than not enjoying the taste of meat) so I would completely respect your choice not to serve meat.

I think the veggie pizza idea is great because you can mix and match toppings, it’s familiar to your guests (i.e. not tofu or something they might be unaccustomed to), and would be a lot of fun at an informal wedding. You could also make a vegetarian lasagne or a tomato pasta dish. Put out lots of salads, garlic bread, potato wedges, etc. and no one will notice that there isn’t any meat!

Surely your guests aren’t expecting you two to serve meat, anyway!

Post # 95
1135 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: March 2014

 What Summer_Rose said: “I’d be fine with most vegetarian options that don’t use meat substitutes but, there is a very good chance that some of your (meat eating) guests will not be satisfied with their dinner, no matter what is served and how creative you get. Sure, they can physically eat it, but someone like my brother and father would probably smile nicely, nibble around their plate and either go home feeling like they didn’t actually eat a meal or duck out early to find a second dinner somewhere else. They wouldn’t be offended that you didn’t provide meat because of your beliefs, but to them, a meal without meat isn’t a real meal. I don’t agree, but that’s how they are.”

I come from a very meat-and-potatoes German American family and I have plenty of family member who feel that way. It’s not as simples as “well everyone can eat veggies.” Some people will just be very unsatisfied with a meatless meal.

That being said, no one is going to die or be scarred or whatever if they eat sparingly for ONE frickin’ meal. Just let your guests know ahead of time so they can fill up on a substantial breakfast or lunch.

Post # 96
536 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

If I was going to a vegetarian or vegan’s wedding I’d have a good meal beforehand so that I wouldn’t end up hungry or else overly filled up on carbs.

Post # 97
159 posts
Blushing bee

I don’t think you need to serve meat. Pizza sounds really good, and I agree that having a choice of toppings for everyone would be nice, but you don’t HAVE to have meat. 

To everyone saying that you should offer meat because others offer vegetarian options at weddings, I disagree. Accomodating someone’s diet restrictions and simply not offering what someone might prefer to eat are two entirely different things.

There is always going to be someone that doesn’t like the food options at a wedding, no matter what you do. Just get some yummy, filling food that everyone will enjoy. 

Post # 98
661 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: March 2010

@lampshade:  I definitely would not be surprised or offended if there was no meat. A wedding is a representation and celebration of a couple…I think I’d be surprised if there WAS meat at your wedding 🙂

Post # 99
4913 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

I wouldn’t expect meat, I wouldn’t be surprised or offended if meat wasn’t there, but I think that you can do something a bit “better” than pizza for a wedding and have it still be vegetarian. 

Post # 100
2294 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2011

I’m sort of torn on this. On one hand, you want your guests to be happy and accomodated. On the other hand, serving meat may go against your morals and ethical beliefs. I’d say it depends on how strongly you and your DH feel about other people eating meat in general. If you don’t have a problem with others eating meat, then serve a meat option. But if you feel it too strongly violates your morals, then don’t serve it.

By the way, pizza sounds way better than those stuffy fancy wedding meals that hardly turn out so good anyhow, at least in my experience as a wedding guest. Pizza…or dried out chicken marsala/tough filet mignon….I’d choose the pizza!

Post # 101
1292 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2012


View original reply

Most people who don’t eat meat do it for ethical reasons. The inverse is not the same thing. 

OP, please don’t feel pressured to serve meat if you are veggies for ethical reasons. 


Post # 102
814 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2015

I was a veggie for eight years so I’m more than happy with eating that kind of food. I wouldn’t expect to be served meat at your wedding if I knew you were veggie. If you did serve it then great, but as I said I used to be veggie so I’d be perfectly fine to eat non-meat stuff. And btw, I think Tofu is delicious. XD

Post # 103
2336 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

I would not be surpised, but I would be a little disappointed.  I catered to many preferences and dietary restrictions at my wedding (Hindu, Jewish, MANY allergies – sesame, fruit with pits, onions!, gluten, to name a few, vegetarian).  I would appreciate if the host for my comfort and enjoyment similarly tried to find something I would enjoy.  I would not be pissed but if I was still hungry I’d leave early if need be.  Pizza for me would be very tasty, but I don’t have any restrictions.

Post # 104
3154 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

I would be surprised if there was no meat, but only because it seems the bride and groom go out of their way to please their guests these days! I love vegetarian food (actually i love any and all food), so I would definitely not be upset if there was no meat. I attend weddings to celebrate the love of the couple, not to critique their menu selection:)

Post # 105
70 posts
Worker bee

Wow. As a vegetarian I find some of these responses beyond ridiculous and insulting.

As a non meat eater – as opposed to a omnivore (which is what the majority of the population is – not  “meat eaters”) I never expect my host to cater to my diet despite the fact that I do not eat meat and they often eat non meat foods. Since I don’t make that assumption I would expect the same courtesy to be extended to me, for the following reasons:

1)    1.  For me vegetarianism is not just a preference it’s a moral decision. Even though humans are designed to eat flesh I choose not to and supplement my diet with other plant based proteins because I find the practice of killing other animals for my food to be morally wrong. I AM MORALLY OPPOSED TO IT. I’m not being a picky child. This is the closest thing to religion I follow on a daily basis.

2)  There is no double standard because people are not carnivores by nature. It will not put any omnivore out to go one meal without meat. Allergies and intolerances aside I shouldn’t have to cater to all my guests’ likes and dislikes. While I appreciate it when friends and family account for my moral stance I never assume that they will accommodate it. I definitely shouldn’t be asked to compromise my morals because some of my guests like meat more than some veggie/pasta/potato whatever dish. Unless a guest is MORALLY opposed to the eating of non-meat foods there is no double standard.

3)   If it’s preachy to practice your belief system at your own wedding I guess no one should have any religious or spiritual references at their weddings. Since you know weddings aren’t political or moral establishments at all.

4)  It’s the guests job to inform the host of their preferences, life styles , allergies and intolerances. If a guest is allergic to something they can’t just assume that the host knows because that’s unfair. Any host should try their hardest to work out something with their caterer or the guest themselves because trying to accommodate every single diet would be IMPOSSIBLE and it’s silly to place that burden on the host vegetarian or not.

Post # 106
632 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

@lampshade:  Would you be offended if there wasn’t a vegetarian option at a meat eating couple’s wedding?

I personally wouldn’t really be offensed but I feel like it’s a little rude not to provide the same courtesy meat eaters show you when they provide vegetarian options. It feels a little pushy to force your beliefs on people like that. 

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