(Closed) Would you feel guilty upgrading your ring?

posted 10 years ago in Rings
Post # 3
Member
4883 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

My ring is more than I ever hoped for- upgrading it would make it too big for me.  I also love that he proposed with this ring.  That being said, I might be able to see making additions/changes to the existing diamonds, but even that is a long shot.

Post # 4
Member
3942 posts
Honey bee

Nope, I love my ring 🙂

 

Post # 5
Member
21 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: March 2012

I would never trade in my ring! My Fiance picked it out all by himself, and I love that it represents his commitment to me, where we are in life right now (financially), and that every time I look at my ring, I think about the wonderful night that he asked me to spend my life with him.

My advice? Keep your gorgeous engagement ring, and if you really want something else, get a drop dead gorgeous right hand ring or a beautiful pendant.  Just my two cents!

Post # 5
Member
5839 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: May 2011

I would feel guilty about getting a new stone because I know how much thought he put into picking it and how much money he spent. I’m too sentimental to even want a new stone. I could see myself changing the setting at some point (and I wouldn’t feel guilty) but that’s it.

Post # 6
Member
3569 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

If i saw a ring i fell in love with, i would totally upgrade!  I’d probably wait until the 5 year anniversary

Post # 7
Member
1137 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

I don’t mind upgrading – I actually upgrading this year to a new setting (and move my stone over, since I had a solitare – but we’ve been engaged for almost 3 1/2 years now). I’ve got no issues with upgrading – either before the wedding or after. You can always take some new pictures if you upgrade later – if you feel the need to display your ring pictures.

Post # 8
Member
207 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

I love my ring. It’s so much more than I could have hoped for. That being said, if we won the lottery, or had a distant relative we never met but had no other family who died and left us his fortune I certainly wouldn’t turn down some ridiculous left hand sparkle upgrade. No sir. Uh uh. I’d always keep this ring, though, because he propsed with it. I don’t think I could ever “turn it in” for another one.

Post # 9
Member
204 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: November 2012

Personally, yes. I would never do it. It’s up to the couple, and I would never say anything negative about/to people who did, but the thought of it sends a lick of guilt up my spine. It doesn’t matter how much a ring costs, or what it’s like, it’s what it symbolises. Of course, I think it’s important that the lady/man wearing the ring likes it, but stats and size aren’t the issue. Every time I look at my ring I think of how much I love my fiance and how lucky I am to have him. May sound cheesy, but having him means more to me than any jewel.

 

Even if I ever got in a real ring rage, there’s no way my fiance would ever upgrade my ring. He doesn’t believe in it. If I ever purchased one for myself, he’d dump me. So unless I want to be single, I’ll keep mine. 🙂

Post # 10
Member
2099 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: April 2012

No, I would not upgrade but that does not mean I would not hold out for an anniversary band 🙂

I am wearing my engagement ring with matching bands on either side but want an emerald cut eternity ring some day for my right hand

Post # 11
Member
15399 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

Yes, I would feel guilty and wouldn’t do it.  He spent a ton of time and money getting me a ring I would never have to upgrade.  Unless I hit the lotto, we certainly dont have *that much* spare cash lying around that I could justify spending on an upgrade either.

Post # 12
Member
5667 posts
Bee Keeper

View original reply
@unixfairy: This. I would never upgrade my engagement ring because it has too much sentimental vale, but my mom has a lovely 3 stone diamond and sapphire anniversary band that I’ve been drooling over since I was a kid. She got it for her 20th wedding anniversary, though, so it looks like I have a long way to go before I get one!

Post # 13
Member
132 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

I love my ring and it has a lot of emotional significance to me, so I would never consider an “upgrade”. I guess if my Fiance had given me a ring I didn’t care for as much, I might have it modified (as long as he didn’t mind)–but I would ask them to use the original gold/platinum in the new setting so it would still be the same ring (or else use some of it in each of our wedding bands…how cute would that be?), and I’d have the stone(s) reset into a pendant or something. I could never just trade it in for something different. To me that’s treating a gift of great symbolic and emotional importance as a mere commodity.

All that is definitely not to say that I don’t enjoy and wish to acquire more sparkly things. For instance, I’d be utterly delighted to be surprised with a flashy right hand cocktail ring someday. But I think a lot of women go through a multi-year phase around their engagement/wedding during which all desire for bling revolves around the left ring finger, which seems silly to me. Say you’re young and you have a relatively modest engagement ring–I think it’d be nice to look at it in 25 years when you’re better off and could have “upgraded” five times if you wished and to wear your ring as a proud emblem of the young couple you once were. Personally I’d rather satisfy my love of sparkles with other pieces of jewelry, hopefully with some emotional significance of their own, over the years.

Post # 14
Member
206 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

I wouldn’t upgrade my ring….we already talked about upgrading the centre stone one day cause it was what he could afford now and where he bought the ring has an upgrade policy on the stone.

Post # 15
Member
1245 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

I still kinda sorta want to upgrade my ring. Not because it’s not pretty enough or anything but because I’m allergic to it! There is nickel in the compound and once the plating comes off it hurts. Really bad. So i feel horribly guilty about wanting a new ring. If or when I do get one, I’m probably going to have it made the way I want, so that it leaves a tribute to my now ring.

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