(Closed) Would you feel guilty upgrading your ring?

posted 10 years ago in Rings
Post # 16
Member
3620 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

I would never upgrade my ring set that my hunny proposed and married me with, but I love the idea of a matching anniversary band to stack.

Post # 17
Member
2088 posts
Buzzing bee

I’m “upgrading” later this year, or early next. Not because I want something bigger or more expensive or whatever, but because we rushed through the ring-buying process and bought the first thing we loved. Which happens to be a large amethyst with an even larger halo. And it’s rectangular and low-set. Wearing a band of any sort with this ring will look ridiculous (even for a gap-lover like me!).

So at Christmas we’re switching my amethyst beauty to my right hand and Ging is buying some sort of moissanite solitaire for me to wear as my new engagement ring.

ETA: I don’t feel guilty about it at all. Maybe it’s because he didn’t propose with a ring, the ring was purchased 2 months after we got engaged. So while there is emotional significance to it, it’s nowhere near as large a sentiment as it would be had this been a proposal-ring. Does that make sense?

Post # 18
Member
3135 posts
Sugar bee

I would only do it if I didn’t like my first ring, and it was ‘pre discussed’ that I could change it or, and exactly as in my case that DID happen, the ring was faulty and when going into to see WTF could be done, I upgraded (and poor DFH wasn’t even there! I had to make the decision on the fly with iphone photos back and fourth!)

Post # 19
Member
4108 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: December 2011

Some can’t afford the ring they want when they’re first married & actually plan an upgrade later. I think it all depends on the couple/situation, etc. I think you’ll always find one you like ‘better’ if you keep looking- there are many bees here that go through 2-3 or more different rings because they changed thier mind, even having picked the first one themselves. I’m personally glad I didn’t choose- I feel like I’d always second guess myself because I’d always find one prettier. I wouldn’t want to upgrade the way you are describing (even though I think it’s pretty cool chain jewelry stores do that- do they offer the same policy for just the center stones?), as in I want to keep my original setting forever. However, my center stone was passed down to us, so I’d like to pass it on to our future son or daughter down the road.. and replace mine with a new stone- and, I’m not gonna lie- I wanna bigger one ๐Ÿ™‚ For me, this doesn’t necessarily have to be 30 years from now when our child actually gets married, maybe in 5 years or so to mark an anniversary. The only other way I can think to change it where I wouldn’t feel guilty is to add an eternity band or something to the other side of my set…

I say sit on it for awhile & see if you’re still wanting that very ring after some time has passed. If it’s thier most popular, it’s not going anywhere. It’s really up to you how sentimental your original set is to you & whether or not you’d want to give it up.

  

Post # 20
Member
140 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

There are always going to be other rings that you love, he can get you that one for an anniversary :). I could never upgrade my ring, he chose it himself and put all that effort into it. The sentimental value it has could never be replaced. 

 

Post # 21
Member
1995 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

I wouldn’t feel guilty upgrading my ring in lets say 50 years!  In fact when we’re retired and if we have enough money and have paid for our kids to go to college then YES I plan on upgrading my ring. 

Post # 22
Member
215 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

I wouldn’t want to upgrade.  My ring was exactly what I wanted style-wise and more than I expected size-wise.  I’m also very sentimental about it. ๐Ÿ™‚  

I don’t think I’d want an anniversary band since I have little fingers and feel like anything more than my current set would be overwhelming on one finger.  I’d be more than happy with a right hand ring or some other piece of anniversary/first baby jewelry someday. ๐Ÿ˜‰

Post # 23
Member
7 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: June 2012

I would be open to upgrading, the ring we chose was not my dream ring, but I love it for what it is.  But if I had to give the jewlers my ring and give it up for ever I couldnt do it.  If we bought a new ring I would want to keep my origional one.

Post # 24
Member
1755 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

I’m fine with having an anniversary band or anniversary wrap years down the road, but I love my ring and wouldn’t change a thing about it ๐Ÿ™‚

Post # 25
Member
236 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

I would think of upgrading it if both Fiance and I both loved the set and were okay with it, then why not. Even though I love my bridal set and Fiance picked out by himself neither of us are that sentimental. The ring is just a symbol of our love but without this ring or with another ring we still have our love. I dont know… I think it varies from couple to couple. Fiance purchased 2 additional bands for me but neither will be used at our ceremony. And I got Fiance 2 wedding bands… a cheap 1 for work and the good expensive one for special ocassions which will also be the ring used for the ceremony so because we have the option of interchanging rings as we see fit does that mean we love or value our commitment any less? 

Like I said if you are both okay with the upgrade I dont see why not

Post # 26
Member
4369 posts
Honey bee

I love my ring, so I have no want of an upgrade. I would feel a little guilty too simply because we paid so much for it. However, in the future, if I found something else I loved and we could afford it, it would not be an issue for me. In my opinion, the ring doesn’t symbolize our marriage commitment at all; it’s a nice piece of jewelry (along with some social convention) that I choose to wear. 

Post # 27
Member
388 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

Nope. If DH wanted me to have more bling I’d be more than happy to accept.

Post # 28
Member
2948 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

we upgraded mine. I dont regret it one bit, DH was the one that suggested it! haha.

Post # 29
Member
4544 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

I guess it’s different for everyone! I initially thought I would want to upgrade down the road (and who knows, maybe I still will) but I’ve grown attatched to this ring and this diamond. DH and I looked into the setting type of diamond together but he spent a LOT of time making the final decision in the jeweler’s without me and honestly, that means a lot to me ๐Ÿ™‚ So, I’m thinking no. Plus, now we have a house and I’d rather do upgrades to that then spend $$ on an upgrade for my ring. Then when we have kids I think I’ll want to spend money on them!

Post # 30
Member
6390 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: September 2011

My mom got a setting upgrade so now she has a cute story about when he proposed and when he gave her  the new setting :). I can’t say I’ll do it, though, because Fiance and I don’t have a ton of extra money floating around and we could definitely use it on other things.

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