Post # 1
I was just thinking this morning about some friends of ours who have had some medical problems conceiving. I know that in the process they became extremely in debt and that they lost their apartment to it. So, would you go in debt for it?
Post # 3
I don’t think anyone *wants* to go into debt to have a baby, I don’t know the mentality and heartbreak of wanting a child more than anything and not being able to. If I had to make financial sacrifices FOR the baby that put me into debt, I’d do that.
Post # 4
I honestly can’t fault anyone for wanting to exhaust every opportunity when it comes to having a child. I have a friend who has been TTC for nearly 3 years now and doctors can’t officially tell her why she’s unable to conceive, just that it will be extremely difficult for her to do so. She and her husband have gone through several treatments, and throw every spare penny they have toward it, but they haven’t lost their house or anything. I just feel so terrible for her because she wants a baby SO badly. Honestly, I guess there’s a lot worse things you could go into debt for. It’s kind of like college loans- that’s considered at least a “good” debt because it’s beneficial to your quality of life.
Post # 5
I think it’s very hard to know the psyche and hardship of a couple wanting to conceive so badly and not being able to. You can’t possibly know unless you are in their shoes.
I have to say for us we desperately want babies of our own. We will definitely exhaust every possibly way of conceiving a baby of our own.
I’m not sure we will let it get to the point of losing our home….but I’m not there now so it’s easy to say! We’ll just have to cross that bridge when we get to it.
Post # 6
If I went into debt TTC and I actually HAD baby, how would I have the means to provide it with the basic necessities of life? I would rather adopt or foster.
Post # 7
I’d go into debt to adopt. I probably wouldn’t for a biological b/c I already know my fertility is iffy and have always wanted to adopt. That said, I wouldn’t want any other debt at the time when I do it but maybe a small mortgage.
EDIT: I can’t blame them for going into debt. The want for a biological child is so powerful that honestly sometimes I cry that I may never be able to have one. For those going through that at this time, I don’t fully understand the longing and heartache. I think there are things people go into debt for like cars, houses, but people, I have no problem with really.
Post # 8
No. It’s a very tough call but FH and I have already decided that if when we start TTC and there are difficulties we are going to put a time limit on it. I’m only going to put myself through so much and if my body can’t handle it I will turn to adoption. Yes, I’d like to have my own baby, but when push comes to shove there are perfect little babies out there with no parents that I could spoil and spend that money on too.
Post # 9
I would go into manageable debt, I would not get to the point of needing public assistance or ruining my credit. I would make major sacrifices for the child, yes. But I wouldn’t want to raise a child in a house where I couldn’t give them the things they need and deserve. The stress of losing a home can really effect a kid. You need to be aware of EVERYTHING when raising a child.
Post # 10
Not to conceive, but if I had to go into debt for medical treatment related to an unexpected pregnancy or such, then yes. It would be important to me that I and the child remain as healthy as possible.
Post # 11
@SweetRose2011:I would go into debt for it if we accidentally got pregnant before we finished saving up for it, but I wouldn’t plan to have the baby till we were ready.
Post # 12
If it were a wedding, something unecessary because you can still get married without a wedding, I’d say no and it’s stupid and such a waste of money.
For this couple, no one really knows what they are having to deal with. It’s something different, nothing I would judge that couple about.
Post # 13
We have friends that are. They spent all of their savings to do a first round of IVF. She got pregnant with twins, carried them to 28 weeks, and after a complicated delivery, they both ended up passing away within 2 weeks.
They found some complications that they could take care of early on if she decided to do it again.. and gave her some reassurance that they could give her a much better outcome. They decided to do a 2nd round, taking out a loan for half of it.. and giving it one more try. She’s actually 36 weeks pregnant!!
After watching everything they’ve gone through just to become parents.. I would say yes. I would too. And there’s no way I would ever judge someone for making that choice.
Post # 14
yes, without hesitation. if i was to have trouble concieving, me and my hubby would do anything possible (including oging into debt) to have a child. to us its def worth it. People go into debt for things much less important.
Post # 15
@stargal34: I agree. I was trying to say it but you put it well, “People go into debt for things much less important.”
Post # 16
I don’t want to go into debt or owe on anything but a house, but if the circumstances arose that I could not have a child unless X,Y and Z then it would be a serious consideration.