(Closed) Would you help DH pay off old debt

posted 3 years ago in Money
Post # 2
Member
99 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: December 2014

My husband and I are a team. His debt is my debt and vice versa. Of course I would do everything in my power to help him pay his debt.

Post # 3
Member
1310 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2015

I don’t know what a “snowball” is but I would definitely help my husband pay down debt. It will benefit both of you in the long run to get his credit in order. 

Post # 4
Member
562 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2015

Now that you’re married his debt is your debt. It sounds to me like it’s in your best interest to help one another… after taking a hard look at exactly what happened and making sure he knows how to properly handle his debts in the future.

Post # 5
Member
9663 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: City, State

When you get married their debt becomes your debt and vice versa. Thems the shakes when you get married.

You said he’s helped you lots over the years with money so I don’t understand why you wouldn’t help him now. 

Post # 6
Member
2398 posts
Buzzing bee

Navygirl14:  Since you’re married, his debt is your debt – they’re no longer seperate. Dave Ramsey’s plan is a great one, and I would encourage you to simply roll your husband’s debt into the plan you have already established, and re-adjust priorities based on that. 

Post # 7
Member
419 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: November 2016 - Muhlhauser Barn

i would say once you marry someone you share debt. His debt is now yours; yours is his.  I know it can be frustrating but also talking about “from here on out here is how the bills should be paid or monitored…” conversation shoud happen.

Post # 9
Member
2257 posts
Buzzing bee

Navygirl14:  If I were struggling, my Darling Husband would help me, and if Darling Husband were struggling, I’d help him. I wouldn’t pay off 100% of his credit card debt, because he makes more than me, but since he’s got a lot more expenses (we’re buying a house, and he’ll be paying the bills), I have offered to pay off parts of his credit card until certain work bonuses kick in.

You need to discuss responsibility in finances, and explain to him that you’ll help him pay off his debt, but things need to change when it comes to how he spends money.

Post # 10
Member
1112 posts
Bumble bee

Navygirl14:  Before we were married, and even before we were engaged, my now Husband was gifted about $20,000 from his grandmother. My Husband had all of his schooling paid for and had no debt at the time, but I paid my own way through Undergrad, and through a Master’s degree. I was in the middle of writing my dissertation and was stressed about finishing, working full time, balancing 3 loans, etc. We had been together for about 5 years at the time, and living together for 2 years – so we were partners.

Just to note – I am the breadwinner of the family. I make easily tripple what my husband does (thanks to the Master’s degree).

The man paid off one of my 3 loans with this money. It was the smallest one I had, but at a few thousand dollars, it was still significant. It was the greatest gift he could have ever given me! It was that moment that I knew that we were partners, and what is his, is mine, and vice versa. He said that he wanted to build a future with me, and eliminating one of the loans was the best investment he could make. 

He also bought my engagement ring, and put half of it into a savings account for a house down the line with the rest of the cash. 

So would I help my Darling Husband pay off some debt? In a heartbeat. 

Post # 11
Member
251 posts
Helper bee

I treat my husbands debt as my own and vice versa. We are a team. I would never think of doing it differently. 

Post # 12
Member
2135 posts
Buzzing bee

Yes. Your debt will be his debt and vice versa.

Post # 13
Member
2020 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: April 2018

Well, you could see if you can put him on a budget that would QUICKLY get rid of those debts. But if something that would take a long time with out help, then yes. I would help because his score will now impact my score. 

Something my SO did for me was we moved a debt to a low interest card of his. So now, I pay it off on that card. Rather then paying off twice the interest. 

Post # 15
Member
1310 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2015

Navygirl14:  Interesting – that sounds like a strange strategy.  I would think you would pay off whatever has the highest interest rate first.  At least that is what I was told when I had consumer debt.

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