(Closed) Would you judge a pregnant lady for smoking?

posted 3 years ago in Pregnancy
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  • Post # 16
    Member
    523 posts
    Busy bee

    Yes. I work with children who had pregnancies impacted by smoking/drinking/drugs in utero. I couldn’t imagine knowing that it is potentially harming your unborn child and choosing to do it anyway. 

    Post # 17
    Member
    913 posts
    Busy bee

    Yes I would. There is plenty of evidence to demonstrate how harmful smoking can be to a baby, and she is basically just ignoring it (and not taking responsibility for quitting or getting the help she needs). 

    Post # 18
    Member
    1703 posts
    Bumble bee

    I would definitely judge…I don’t care if you want to smoke and destroy your own body, but it isn’t fair to the unborn child that didn’t have a say…if you can’t stop smoking for the sake of your child, you probably aren’t ready to be a parent. There are so many people dying to be parents that for whatever reason can’t conceive – it breaks my heart to see people be so irresponsible with the honor.

    Post # 19
    Member
    3307 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: November 1999

    I preface this by saying that my mother smoked while I was in utero and I’ve always been disgustingly healthy. <knocks wood> But this was back in the early 60s and her Dr told her that it was fine, the baby would just be smaller. My mother is a highly intelligent woman but in that instance she was dumb as a stone and she will freely admit it. 

    In this day and age of course I would judge someone for smoking while pregnant. There’s enough information out there so that everyone knows it’s bad – very bad. But it’s awfully hard to quit. 

    Post # 20
    Member
    1358 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: January 2027

    LaPetiote:  just like any addiction it’s not that easy to just give up, however you’d think most would want to, for the benefit of their child. I quit 17 years ago when I got pregnant with my son and never started again.

    My sister in law has smoked in all 4 of her pregnancies, she’s currently 4 months along, and my 3 oldest nephews are seemingly very healthy….ssssoooo…

    I just wouldn’t want to risk it. 

    Post # 22
    Member
    9101 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper
    • Wedding: December 2012

    Yep. I wouldn’t say anything, though. Just like if I saw a pregnant woman drinking — her body, her business.

    Post # 23
    Member
    876 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: August 2015

    Absolutely. My parents were CF (not strictly by choice, they were told they couldnot have kids due to chemotherapy, but they had come to terms with that) until they got pregnant  with me and then they both quit their 30-a-day habit the day they found out they were expecting. Of course it is hard to quit. She probably doesn’t really want to yet.

    Does she really know the harm she can be causing? Im sure it will be discussed in her appointments. I doubt it would be helpful if you said anything unless it was constructive though. e.g you could say… “I was reading that this new nicotine patch/gum is really effective and is safe in pregnancy, you should take a look.”

    Post # 24
    Member
    130 posts
    Blushing bee

    I have a friend who smoked through both of her pregnancies. She said her doctor told her the stress of quitting would be worse for the baby than actually quitting (I don’t know how true that is). Both of her babies came around 30 weeks because of pre-eclampsia and then her body kept trying to expel the second baby. Both babies lived  in the NICU for weeks after. On the other hand my SOs mother smoked throughout all 5 of her pregnancies and claims her kids are just fine (all have ADHD or are bipolar). 

    I try it to judge but I know how bad it is for the baby, it’s hard not to. 

    Post # 26
    Member
    570 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: August 2016 - Temecula, California

    My first reaction when I see people smoking is “Wow are people really still doing that?” Lol. 

    As far as smoking while pregnant… Yeah I would for sure judge. It would be the same as drinking while pregnant to me. 

    I would be brutally honest and tell my friend how selfish she is being and that I am not going to watch her make stupid decisions. 

    Post # 27
    Member
    1310 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: April 2015

    Many doctors advise pregnant women to taper off smoking rather than going cold turkey, because if the mom is strung out and in distress, that is no better for the baby than a cigarette or two. Obviously the goal is to stop altogether, but looking at the whole picture is important. 

    Post # 29
    Member
    4111 posts
    Honey bee

    LaPetiote:  I try not to judge, so I would like to think I wouldn’t judge a woman for smoking while pregnant. What another woman does with her body isn’t my business, regardless of whether or not I would make the same decisions.  I literally have so many other things to think about, than what another woman does while she’s pregnant. I don’t have that kind of time, sorry. 

    Post # 30
    Member
    2332 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: October 2014

    I’d judge, he’ll yeah I’d judge! Who does that!!! One thing is to smoke non pregnant (whatever, do whatever you want). But the moment a baby is in the picture you stop! Are people really that weak? 

    PS. I’m a smoker. Planning to TTC soon. 

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