(Closed) Would you leave your SO if he or she cheated on you?

posted 5 years ago in Relationships
Post # 46
Member
13 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: November 2014

View original reply
breatheandrelax:  Regarding cheating, it depends on the situation. If it was purely physical and a one off we would possibly work it out, we have 2 children together and people fuck up. One mistake doesn’t undo years of being a great husband and father.
In regards to lap dances, I would consider it cheating, we discussed it pretty early on in our relationship and luckily we both agreed (and neither of us were really into strip clubs before meeting each other anyway). But who knows it could change over time, I think the key is keeping an open, honest relationship 

Post # 47
Member
888 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: March 2015

I would leave. I have too much self respect to subject myself to the toxic aftermath.

Post # 48
Member
2114 posts
Buzzing bee

I’ve been in this situation before and stayed – it was never the same.

If my SO were to cheat, i’d be gone. I would never put myself through that again.

Post # 49
Member
88 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: April 2016

For me personally – yes I would leave, without a doubt, and I have before. It’s just the way I am. However, I would never judge someone if they decided to stay with their SO after cheating (unless it’s like every other week someone’s cheating, or the whole relationship is a train wreck and THEN cheating happened).. It takes a strong person to work past infedelity. 

My dad cheated on my mom, they divorced, and then got remarried 9 years later. Shit happens. If it’s meant to be, it will find a way. 

I think anything you wouldn’t want your SO to find out or see is cheating. 

Post # 50
Member
1152 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2017

I would want to say yes, 100% because I know that I deserve better. However, I love my SO very much and I can’t imagine the shock I would be in if he cheated and the heartbreak I would have, and it would be so out of his character. I honestly don’t know if I could walk away, even though I know I should. 

Post # 51
Member
860 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: March 2010

no. we have an open relationship. wait. actually, I guess that’s not cheating then… cheating implies lying. if he lied, maybe… depends. I don’t believe in monogamy. but I’m not ok with lying. tough call. 

Post # 52
Member
500 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2016

Yep! 100%. I was with an ex who cheated once, I took him back and then he made out with someone who is now randomly my good friends. Never doing that again…

 

Post # 53
Member
463 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2015

View original reply
breatheandrelax:  absolutely!  There is never a reason for SO to be that close to someone that is not his wife for any type of betrayal to happen. 

 

 

Post # 54
Member
3302 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

I’d leave a SO for sure. But ending a marriage, particularly a longer one, would give me pause. It’s the kind of question you can’t answer unless you’ve been there. 

Post # 55
Member
1112 posts
Bumble bee

It depends whether you had a good man who made a mistake, or just someone who’s a plain a-hole who made mistakes and will continue on making the same mistakes. We all make mistakes after all.

“I chose to stay with him for all the things he’s done right; not the one thing he’s done wrong. I chose to forgive him.”

Post # 56
Member
56 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: July 2016

Yes. I would absolutely leave. I’ve already been through that and will not go through the bullshit again.  I deserve way more. Everyone does.

Post # 57
Member
346 posts
Helper bee

This is tough but I’d have to say it depends. There are only two situations where I would absolutely put my foot down: if my guy cheated and impregnated another woman, or if he cheated with another man. Those two are the point of no return for me everything else is case specific.

Post # 58
Member
5778 posts
Bee Keeper

View original reply
breatheandrelax:  As an older Bee, it’s gotten more black and white for me- I wouldn’t put up with that shit. Period. Not all issues are black and white of course, but to me cheating is one of the few issues that there are no exceptions to.

Post # 59
Member
460 posts
Helper bee

Also, on lap dances – I wouldn’t consider it cheating but I would consider it disrespectful and I’m not willing to be in a relationship where I’m disrespected.

I would end things if my other half was up to stuff like that and it has nothing to do with being insecure.

Post # 60
Member
460 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2016

As for strip clubs: I’ve always been indifferent towards them and my fiance isn’t in to all that anyway, so no worries here. When our friends were talking about our future bachelor/bachelorette parties, he begrudgingly agreed to get a lap dance just because it’s a common thing to do. But knowing him, he’s probably gonna feel weird and laugh about it the whole time.

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