(Closed) Would you let your husband donate sperm to someone you know?

posted 5 years ago in TTC
Post # 2
Member
976 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: March 2015

It sounds like the main problem would occur if you were unable to conceive, because you wouldn’t want them to have your husband’s child while you couldn’t.

So I think it would be perfectly fine to say that you’re not okay with it until after you manage to have your own child(ren). It would also be fine if you were never okay with it.

The bigger concern is your communication with your husband. You shouldn’t have to deal with all these doubts and uncertainties. Why isn’t he willing to keep discussing the issue until you’re satisfied with the resolution?

Post # 3
Member
217 posts
Helper bee

No. Case closed.

Post # 4
Member
390 posts
Helper bee

No, I would not be okay with that.  It’s just too weird and seems like it could get messy and complicated because you know them.  I think I’d be more okay with it being a stranger through a clinic.

Post # 5
Member
3606 posts
Sugar bee

I unequivocally would not be comfortable with my DH donating his sperm to someone else, even if there were clearly no romantic feelings implicated (similar to your situation). He’d feel the same way about my eggs. I wouldn’t like the idea that either of our offspring were out there being raised by someone else…way too many legal, emotional, and ethical issues are implicated in this for my liking. (And yes, I realize this happens when people give babies up for adoption, but that is a completely different issue.)

Post # 6
Member
1076 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

Absolutely not. I completely understand your feelings. Even if you two are able to have as many kids as you want…your feelings would still be perfectly valid. If your husband refuses to have a conversation with you about something this important then I suggest couples counseling because he’s being ridiculously insensitive.

Post # 7
Member
213 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: December 2014

I wouldn’t be okay with my husband donating his sperm to someone else, especially not someone we know.

Post # 8
Member
4858 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

No, not at all. My only exception would be if DH’s brother was infertile – I can see he and his wife wanting the child to be related by blood to both parents and using DH’s sperm would help in that situation. 

ETA: Plus, that would make the child my nephew/niece, so it would be acceptable to care about them and no worries about half-siblings dating, since they’d be “cousins.”

Post # 9
Member
333 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2016

It would NEVER fly in my household. But we both agree when it comes to stuff like that. 

Post # 10
Member
3107 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: March 2016 - Surfer\'s Beach, Grand Cayman

No. I wouldn’t be comfortable with it, and neither would he. I also wouldn’t be comfortable using a sperm donor or surrogate. 

Post # 11
Member
1151 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2017

I would never in a million years agree to let my husband do this. Especially since you are friends with the people.

Post # 12
Member
286 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

Absolutely not. End of discussion.

Post # 13
Member
3247 posts
Sugar bee

Not a snowball’s chance in hell. 

Post # 14
Member
3323 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2017

I’d be more ok with a rando than someone I know. Someone I know it would be weird, seeing HIS kid with someone else.

Post # 15
Member
1272 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

The topic ‘Would you let your husband donate sperm to someone you know?’ is closed to new replies.

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