(Closed) Would you let your three year old son wear a dress to a party?

posted 6 years ago in Parenting
  • poll: Would you let your three year old son wear a dress to a party?

    Yes, I have no problem with this.

    No, I would not let my son wear a dress in public.

    Maybe, depending on the party.

    Other - please comment below

  • Post # 121
    Member
    398 posts
    Helper bee

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    babeba:  ok no problem, i dont think men should be in dresses. simple as that. 

    Post # 122
    Member
    3526 posts
    Sugar bee

    Remember when pants were only for men? 

    Probably not because it was so long ago the concept seems ridiculous. 

    It’s just clothing. What is the different between a dress and pair of pants, really, besides the amount of tubes to stick your legs in. 

    Post # 123
    Member
    2769 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: September 2016

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    FutureMrsTY:  is that you apologizing for putting me down? Because saying something insulting and then telling me it’s okay isn’t how that works.

    Post # 124
    Member
    1470 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: March 2014

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    FutureMrsTY:  People get butt hurt so quickly on the bee. You always have to be “politically correct” on here. No thanks! I could care less what anyone says or thinks. People wanna put their boys in dresses and let them “express themselves”, they can. Doesn’t mean they’re right for doing so and I’m wrong.

    Post # 125
    Member
    1308 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: October 2010

    I would not let my son wear a dress. For any reason. Also the real issue here is the child s parents let him go anywhere knowing full well he would be made fun of. It’s unacceptable to make fun of a child -it’s unacceptable for a parent to be able to prevent pain for your child yet d do nothing about it. 

     

    Post # 127
    Member
    1206 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: June 2018 - Omaha, NE

    In this scenario, I might not have let him wear that particular dress, since it sounds like a party where a costume wouldn’t be appropriate, but if he wanted to change into a nicer dress, you bet I’d let him wear it. Would you let your little girl leave the house in pants? THE SCANDAL. Oh wait, this isn’t the 1800s, it’s 2015, no one cares what you wear as long as your bits are covered. I’m studying to be a teacher and a male student at one of my partner schools regularly wore a dress and sometimes sported 4 inch glitter pumps with them. In my time there I didn’t hear one person make fun of him and several people, myself included, complimented him, the same as if he were a female, because he rocked it! Let kids be kids and leave your judgement (and your gendered clothing) at the door!

    It is not a parent’s job to prevent every instance of being made of, and frankly, that is impossible. Kids make of each other for having different colored hair, sneezing in class, wearing glasses, having freckles, being shorter or taller than others, wearing shoes that aren’t “in fashion” or as expensive as the popular kid’s shoes. There will always be something your kid is getting made fun of, and if you want to make sure they’ll never ever be made fun of, you should paint them the same color as the wall and never let them outside. 

    PUHLEASE.

    Post # 128
    Member
    88 posts
    Worker bee

    No, I would not let my 3 year old boy dress up as Elsa for a dinner party – not appropriate.

    if the boy wanted to wear a real dress – NO. 

    Kids need to learn gender and cultural norms. The boy can’t wear dresses in public. Can’t go into a girls bathroom. It’s not gender appropriate! 

    A 3 year old shouldn’t be able to dictate to you what they wear. Parents are afraid to say NO and set rules and boundaries. 

    A play session is different.

    Im sick of the gender fluidity/neutrality thing as much as helicopter parentiNg! Grow a spine. Don’t be lazy. And don’t hover over your kid. This stuff will give anyone a complex! 

    Post # 129
    Member
    763 posts
    Busy bee

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    ClaudiaKishi:  right? my mom’s yearbook has a page for “trousers day” in the 1960s. it was one day per year that the girls could come to school in pants.

    that’s insanity, especially considering pants for women had been gaining in popularity for decades. it has taken forever. I’m not going to begrudge a guy for wanting to wear something different. 

    Post # 130
    Member
    763 posts
    Busy bee

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    alc1979:  but who defines “boys can’t wear dresses” as today’s gender and cultural norms? of course it depends on where you live, but where I live, seeing a guy in a dress is not usually considered a big deal. 

    Post # 131
    Member
    7571 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper

    Please I dare someone to go tell this guy men don’t wear dresses!

    Post # 132
    Member
    352 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: February 2017

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    alc1979:  the problem I have with the whole ‘boys need to learn they can’t wear dresses in public’ thing is that I don’t see any reason why a dress should be a girl thing anymore than pants are (or were) a boy thing.

    Some men wear kilts…that’s pretty skirt-like and I’d love to see anyone go up to a big Scotish dude and tell him that his outfit isn’t manly enough. If you say “it’s different because it’s a kilt” then I challenge you to ask yourself why that is okay but a dress isn’t. Or a princess tee shirt or light up high heels or anything else the kid wants to wear. 

    Parents who stand up and say it’s fine for their boy to wear a dress or their daughter to run around in He-man Underoos (which my sister did as a reward when she was being potty trained 30 years ago) DO have a backbone because they’re standing up for their kid’s right to wear taffeta (or super hero briefs or whatever).  “I’m letting Johnny wear a dress because that’s what he picked out and we’re just going to the grocery store, so who cares?” sounds like the kind of parent who ISN’T going to give their kid a complex or make them feel guilty or weird or shamed for wanting to rock a frock from the Disney Princess collection. 

    Post # 133
    Member
    352 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: February 2017

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    j_jaye:  hehehe – yaaaaaaasss! EXACTLY! lol

    Men throughout history have worn dresses – it’s only out of the ordinary in current culture because kids are told (usually by their parents) that it’s not okay – so they grow up thinking they’re required to conform because that’s what the people who are supposed to love them unconditionally have taught them is expected. 

    The future King of England (baby George) was presented to the public in a full-on dress! If a dress is good enough for the future king, I don’t see why a princess loving American boy can’t trot out his Elsa dress, too 😂

    Post # 134
    Member
    2769 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: September 2016

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    alc1979:  most three year old boys I know go into women’s washrooms – because if they are out with mom and they or she needs to use the washroom, they are going to go in together.

    And FWIW, a kid is going to be who they are going to be, to a certain extent. If they are straight, then all the wrestling teams in the world coudn’t turn them gay. If they are innately creative minded, they will be drawn to activities allowing theM to express that. And if they really are gender fluid or trans in any way, forcing them to only wear pants isn’t going to change that. It’s just more likely to give them a complex and put them more at risk for being part of the 40-50% of trans youth (depending on the study) who attempt suicide. That’s  14 times higher than the average.

    Post # 135
    Member
    966 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: August 2015

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    princessandthepear:  I would not let my child of either gender wear a costume to a dinner party.

    In general, I am very on the fence with the the whole gender neutral parenting thing.  If my child was sharing costumes with a little girl and wanted to wear it at home I wouldn’t freak out over it, but I wouldn’t purchase a dress costume for a boy.  I don’t believe children should have a huge attachment to what they are wearing anyway, whether it’s gender specific or not.  

    Despite how I feel about it however, I would never belittle someone elses 3 year old child regardless of what they are wearing.  I think that is the worst part of your story.

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