- 7 years ago
- Wedding: September 2015
My step dad (who I am extremely close to) is terminally ill. We were planning to bring the wedding forward to this past January but the night before I was due to book I spent the entire night sobbing and we made the incredibly difficult decision to postpone. He is still here and the fact that he would have made it to my wedding if I’d done it sooner is hard to take but hindsight is a wonderful thing and now it really would be too much for him. Until you are in the situation you simply cannot say what you would do. Of course the first reaction is that you would bring it forward no matter what but actually there are lots of things to consider and it just isn’t that black and white unfortunately. One week is a good week and the next he is in hospital, the emotions of that for the entire family are horrendous and to add a wedding on top was just too much. He did come dress shopping with me though and has seen my dress. We also had a hand fasting engagement ceremony which he was a part of.
We were lucky enough to have both of my remaining grandparents at our wedding, and now, I’ve lost one and will probably loose the other by the end of the month….I cannot tell you how much I love that they were there…how many times we’ve talked about that day and how we enjoyed being together then….don’t wait until she’s got one foot out of the door, if you feel like she’s slipping away and its important, just do it.
To answer your question- YES, I definitely would. My FH and I have lost all of our grandparents. My grandmother who I was absolutely so so so close to passed away 10 years ago; however, if she were alive and there was some chance she could attend if I moved my wedding date up, I would move MOUNTAINS to make sure she could witness it, even if I had to cut corners in other places.
You could have a private ceremony with your loved one and close family members and still keep your big wedding at your original date.
It’s a really difficult decision to make in such sad circumstances too. I think that there’s no doubt I’d try to move everything forwards in the case of a parent who was very unlikely to live long enough to be at the wedding as originally planned though.
My own DH isn’t well. We didn’t hang about before getting married. Not just because his prognosis is unknown right now but also because we were ready to marry and wanted to do just that! But it’s true to say that we didn’t want to risk it not going ahead if we waited too long.
My brother and SIL moved up their wedding so that my uncle (who has always been like a second dad to my brother and I) could be there. Unfortunately, my uncle passed away weeks prior. Made it a very tough wedding for my family – especially my aunt – but we were able to still have a really good time.
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