(Closed) Would you not get married if you’d give up alimony $$?

posted 6 years ago in Relationships
  • poll: Would you re-marry if it meant losing alimony $$?
    No, I'd wait until alimony is finished - money is money : (17 votes)
    11 %
    Yes, I'd re-marry - you can't put a price on love : (99 votes)
    66 %
    Yes, I'd re-marry if I made enough $$ that it didn't matter : (33 votes)
    22 %
    Other-see my reasoning below... : (1 votes)
    1 %
  • Post # 3
    Member
    305 posts
    Helper bee

    i wouldn’t wait.  but i do want to get married sooner so if i die my ex won’t get my ss payments. lol

    Post # 4
    Member
    3569 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: April 2013

    It not even that much money, and I wouldn’t put my life on hold over it.

    Post # 5
    Member
    2616 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: June 2012

    i think its wrong–divorce people sould not be maintain by an ex if they are in a fully happy relationship that is going to become a marriage/or extremely long term…

     

    Post # 6
    Member
    9029 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper
    • Wedding: June 2011

    I agree with @asianyoushi:  

    Post # 7
    Member
    864 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: July 2013

    @lorie:  Don’t you have a job now? That doesn’t sound like much money to make plans around.

    Post # 8
    Member
    10288 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: October 2011

    Why you’re still collecting alimony is beyond me. You’re obviously in a relationship where someone is making money to live on so your ex shouldn’t have to support you any longer. I’m not even sure how you won that case. Regardless, I would never postpone marrying someone I love because of $475 p/month (which really isn’t very much money when you think about it). 

    Post # 9
    Member
    2849 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: May 2012

    I wouldn’t wait for that little amount of money. I probably wouldn’t wait for any amount of money honestly. If you’re in love, then you should go ahead and get married.

    Post # 10
    Member
    3943 posts
    Honey bee

    I cant even believe this is a question.

    Post # 11
    Member
    2233 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: September 2012

    @asianyoushi:  I agree. Totally wrong.

    @UpstateCait:  I don’t really understand why it works this way but I know someone who has been paying child support for 8 year while his ex is supported by someone else. It’s a messed up system.

    Post # 12
    Member
    83 posts
    Worker bee
    • Wedding: November 2013

    @Ms. Martian:  Alimony is different from child support.  Child support is to support your child so whether or not an ex spouse is now being supported by someone else should not have any bearing on whether or not you should still have to pay to support YOUR own child.  Your spouse’s new mate should not have to support a child that isn’t theirs in lieu of their biological parent’s support.  Alimony is usually paid to make up for wages lost by a spouse who gave up their earning potential to stay home and care for the couple’s children, usually a decision they made together because it was most beneficial to the entire family.  Even if the former stay at home spouse was to return to work after the divorce, their time away from the work force will definately affect their current earning ability and they should be compensated for that.

    @lorie:  Can you afford to lose the income or would it make things significantly more difficult for you?  Also, you need to take into consideration the legal and financial benefits of marrying your new spouse.  Possible tax incentives (especially if you’re not working), health insurance benefits, etc, may out weigh the financial benefit of keeping your alimony.  Best of luck!

    Post # 13
    Member
    2104 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: April 2011

    AGTbee beat me to it. Child support is totally something you pay until your child is an adult no matter what the situation.

    That said, I don’t think your ex husband owes you anything at this point…especially when we’re only talking about less than $500/month. I know that money is money, but to put your life on hold over something like that just seems vindictive to me. Get a part time job…there’s your $475.

    Post # 14
    Member
    1697 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: June 2012

     The alimony is there because you NEED it for you and your child to maintain a lifestyle, not as a paycheck so it sounds like you definetely don’t need it to live off of then give it up! If my Fi said he wanted to postpone the wedding so he could get a check from his ex that MIGHT be a dealbreaker for me lol!

     

    Post # 15
    Member
    9029 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper
    • Wedding: June 2011

    @Angelz_love:  Alimony is not for the kid. Child support is for the child. Alimony is basically spousal support.

    Post # 16
    Member
    2063 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: August 2012

    In almost all cases, I would say remarry. However, I have a friend whose husband passed away overseas and she’ll receive quite bit a bit of money and benefits for the rest of her life if she does not remarry. She and her new “husband” are having a ceremony, but will be completing no paperwork. I completely support her decision.

    The topic ‘Would you not get married if you’d give up alimony $$?’ is closed to new replies.

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