(Closed) Would you rather see your SO more or have more income?

posted 7 years ago in Relationships
Post # 32
Member
3051 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: February 2015

My SO & I went through this last year. She got a promotion to a salaried manager position. She was in it for a month working 55-65 hours per week! It literally only took us 2 weeks of these horrendous hours for us to make the decision that it wasn’t worth it.

She’s on track to be in a similar position (salaried again) in March and honestly, we’re both pretty afraid of the same thing happening again. It wasn’t then and will never be worth the increase in pay to have her gone 14 hours a day.

IF for some reason it was the ONLY option for us, I would probably attempt to get a second job as well…both of us being out of the house would be the only way for me personally to cope with her gone that much.

Post # 33
Member
11736 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

It would depend on specifics but most likely time. Work life balance is very important to both of us and luckily our employers feel the same.

Post # 35
Member
2890 posts
Sugar bee

For a second job ? No way. I need spare time. What use would I make of the extra money, I would always be working. I prefer having less and having a detailed budget that still allows dates, good restaurants and wine on weekends, than making more money but having no spare time to spoil my husband or myself.

Post # 36
Member
9082 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: December 2012

My husband is in the Navy and is away a lot. I’d rather see him more. Money just makes our lives more comfortable, I see him a week out of every month if I’m lucky as it stands.

Post # 37
Member
2278 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

View original reply
@beachbride1216:  My love languages are pretty close to yours. For me, physical touch is slightly in front (9) to quality time (7) 🙂

Post # 38
Member
1105 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

I’d prefer to spend time with SO. 

But the thought of getting a side job on top of my day job crossed my mind this morning. Just got back from our honeymoon and I hate the idea of settling back into the 9 to 5 grind with nothing to look forward to and extra cash would allow us perhaps more mini breaks or something… 

Post # 39
Member
94 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

See him more.   Money comes and goes but time is precious and once you lose it, you can’t get it back.

Post # 40
Member
4045 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: January 2014

If we needed the money, then yes, get that second job, work more overtime. But if we’re living comfortably as is? Then no. I’d rather have less stress.

Post # 41
Member
746 posts
Busy bee

@greenidlady:  He works from home, so I kind of wish he’d do the extra consulting jobs he’s always talking about…it’s not that he has to leave home to do it so I really never miss him lol.  

Post # 42
Member
1471 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 2013

Usually time, but at the moment we really do need the money. I can’t legally work, and it is really hard to pay for 2 adults + 2 student loans on his current income (although his company is great and treats him really well). We make it work, but it’s tough. If he got offered a second part time job, or overtime he would take it in a heartbeat.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Post # 43
Member
756 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

My husband works a second job from home. I went back to school this semester, so I’m barely working any. My husband is a software developer. But he eventually wants to get private clients and work for himself and start his own buisness. So, he’s gotten one client on his own now as a second job. It’s only about 10-15 hours a week though, so he can’t quit his day job yet. So, he does it more for our future than needing a second job. We’re still trying to work out seeing each other though. At least he’s at home when he’s working extra.

By him working an extra 10-15 hours a week though he actually makes more at his second job than I was working full time. So, it’s freed me up to do more of the chores and take some off of him. We actually haven’t felt like we’re seeing each other that differently since my job had crazy hours and I had to work weekends. I’m getting to be home more. So, there’s been some give and take, but this may actually be working better for us. 

It all depends on how much you need the money and what the circumstances are. We don’t really have to have my husband work extra, but he wants to to help his career. 

Post # 44
Member
2143 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2015

If we didn’t ‘need’ the money, I would much rather spend more time with him than have a larger income. 

Post # 45
Member
1047 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2014

Time definitely. Me and Fiance moved from Ireland because the hours were killing us. We were both doing 65+ hours a week, he once worked 117 hours in a week!  We were both obliged to work those hours by our employers, but we came to learn that it just wasn’t worth it. It actually worked out really well, we’re working less hours and earning more money here in Oz. It does scare me because Fiance is very driven in his career, and is in a specialty where hard work Ian’s long hours are expected. I don’t want to lose him to work. But I think that here in Australia we can make it work. 

Post # 46
Member
3088 posts
Sugar bee

More money hands down.

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