(Closed) Would you respond to this RSVP?

posted 6 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 16
Member
2430 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2012 - The Gables Inn, Santa Rosa, CA

We had a friend who brought her new boyfriend who we hadn’t met before the wedding, but her invitation had a +1 and when I sent it, she had been in a long term relationship with another guy and they broke up after her RSVP.  She never said anything, but neither did we.  It was a little odd because we had a pretty small wedding and I kept seeing this guy in my photos and I couldn’t figure out who the heck he was! But I wasn’t really upset about it. They didn’t date for that long, but it wasn’t really a huge deal overall because she didn’t know a ton of people there and would have probably felt awkward going alone, and I DID give her the +1, so it’s her choice who she used it on.  

Your situation is a little different though, because you didn’t OFFER her a +1.  I would definitely respond and let her know that you’re sorry, but space is limited and unfortunately her invitation was for her ONLY.  

If she actually KNEW a guy she met on CL and was dating him, I would have expected her to put his name, but this to me looks like she’s planning on “finding” a random date via craigslist for the wedding, which I would NOT be ok with.  

Post # 17
Member
15 posts
Newbee

I would 100% take her reply as a joke that she made at her own expense but just to be sure I would also call her or send her a text to ask if this amazing guy had a name and would he like to eat a meal.

I had a similar thing happen to me – I sent a STD to a male friend from work whom I’ve known for over 5 years and thought was currently single (a year earlier he’d gone through a terrible break up and was quite devastated) and he asked if he could bring his girl.

We both have a pretty wicked/ dark sense of humor so I said that as long as she has a pulse she is welcome 🙂

All the best 🙂

 

Post # 18
Member
2168 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

View original reply
spiffanee:  Uggggh. People think they’re sooo hilarious. We also had guests use the RSVP cards to write limericks and ridiculous requests on – people think it’s a speakeasy.

I think your friend was being tongue in cheek. Just ask her.

Post # 19
Member
119 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: August 2015

View original reply
spiffanee:  You need to know.  It’ll be weird on the placecard and she’ll think you’re a fool if she was joking.  I would ask lol.

Post # 20
Member
1364 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: March 2016

Yes, there is no way this is serious, and it’s kind of hilarious. Good one on her part.

Post # 21
Member
570 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2016

View original reply
spiffanee:  I think she was making a joke about being single and not having a date. I don’t think she’ll find someone from craigslist but I think she will just be recruiting some guy friends to find a date for your wedding.

Post # 22
Member
1740 posts
Bumble bee

Please let us know what she says! My best guess is that she is kidding, but she is the kind of person who A)wishes you had given her a plus one and B)wishes she had a date. 

Post # 23
Member
7414 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: May 2014

our best man included ‘Albion St Hooker’ as his guest…it was totally a joke and we knew it (but there was the posibilty that he’d bring a random with him and we wouldn’t have been surprised or upset.

Post # 24
Member
845 posts
Busy bee

What the actual f?

Post # 25
Member
2417 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2015

‘We are sorry, but we are unable to accommodate Craigslist randoms at this time. Thank you for your cooperation’

Post # 26
Member
38 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: September 2015

This is definitely one of those WTF moments. I would ask Fiance about it and have him call her about it.

My former Maid/Matron of Honor rsvp’d and for #of guests she put “Less than a congress more than a gaggle!” I was irritated but I called her and played it off and told her cute now give me a number. 

Post # 27
Member
2452 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2015

I think it’s a joke but it could also be her very rude way of pointing out that you didn’t give her a plus one.

I gave my one single friend a +1 and she texted me saying “I may have to pull a Wedding Date scenario and put an ad in the classifieds to find a date for your wedding!” It made me laugh but if I hadn’t given her a plus one I wouldn’t have been amused.

I’d either tell her you cannot accommodate a guest or, if you’re willing to bend the rules for her, just tell her you need a name.

Post # 28
Member
2953 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

View original reply
spiffanee:  I’d followup.

Post # 29
Member
1640 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2015

Haha it might not be a joke! My Maid/Matron of Honor “met” her wedding date on Twitter. They met in real life for the first time at our rehearsal dinner!

But if she wasn’t given a plus one, definitely follow up.

Post # 30
Member
542 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2016

View original reply
spiffanee:  How close is she to you both?  It could be some sort of joke…  but at least follow up and tell you in person she’s kidding and give you actual names/meal choices….

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