Would you "settle" for moissanite because of the cheaper price?

posted 2 years ago in Rings
Post # 31
Member
2646 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2017

c3lloninja :  I think it’s really a matter of taste, natural diamonds can be affordable too if you’re willing to compromise on color and clarity, so the question is what do you prefer? The “naturalness” of a budget friendly diamond? Or the lab created “perfection” of a moissanite? If it were me I’d go with a budget diamond, but I have different taste, there are several diamonds on Etsy that I think are beautiful that I’m sure many here woukd describe as “rustic” at best.

Post # 32
Member
204 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2002

 I’m with @Olivepepper. Why not have both? If you get a small diamond I bet you’ll still want a nice big sparkly moissanite RHR down the road. If you get a big moissanite now, you’ll probably still want a diamond. I had a small diamond and had a desire for a larger sparkly presence on my hand so I got a 2 1/2 carat moissanite. It is every bit as beautiful as a diamond and a lot easier to see! Are they exactly the same? No…who cares. I just ordered a Chris CZ too….and it’s so nice looking I’m going to have it made into a ring.

Keep it in perspective, it’s not a measure of your SO’s love. Don’t let anyone shame you about whatever you choose! The fact is, the “real diamond” people grow tired of/dissatisfied with their rings and are upgrading as much as the moissanite and CZ owners. That’s what makes this website fun. Except for the newlyweds, everyone is here looking for the next ring inspiration, lol.

Like @mrl201020 most of the women I know have teeny, included, diamonds that don’t sparkle at all. I want to tell them to pop a $300 moissanite in there and start enjoying their ring! I love the photo below, because it illustrates the OP’s dilemma. $900 ACC moissanite on the left, $2,700 Round Brilliant diamond on the right, both brilliant, both full of fire. Which to choose.wink Good luck with your decision.

Post # 33
Member
65 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: May 2015

I have a diamond e-ring, but it’s challenging to wear at work & id never bring it on vacation. (I’d never wear it in sand or chlorine and you can’t trust housekeepers). So with that being said, I’m looking into getting a moissanite for times when I don’t want to wear my diamond. But no, I’d never choose moissanite over my diamond initially. It just seems “fake” to me (don’t kill me anyone!)

Post # 34
Member
89 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: November 2018

 

mrstodd2bee :  I guess I’m one of the “rare” people that only wanted a sim. Fiance and I do well financially. We’re by no means rich but each make over $100k and have about a 6 months salary in the bank, own our home (with a reasonable mortgage), etc. I didn’t want a diamond for multiple reasons, one of which being that I lose EVERYTHING and if I had a $10k ring on my finger I’d constantly be scared I’d lose it. I wanted a moissy over a CZ because they are way more durable. 

I love my ring BECAUSE it’s a moissy, not despite it. I actively point out to people that it’s not a diamond. Some people only want a diamond and probably have their own reasons, but I hope it’s something more than society telling them that’s the only acceptable engagement stone.

 

That said, OP, I wouldn’t “settle” on your ring. I would hate to have that feeling about my ring.  Do some research and decide what stones you like and what you can do within budget. If necessary, consider getting a stand in ring and saving up for a replacement- but even then, pick something you love and don’t “settle.”

Post # 35
Member
658 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2016

There’s always going to be something “better” out there. I have both a diamond and a moissanite, and sometimes I want a bigger and better quality diamond or a different type of moissanite, etc. I could easily get sucked into wanting more than what I have. At the end of the day despite the fact that I’m fully aware of the marketing that goes behind diamonds, because of my personal taste I’m glad my husband got me a diamond for my engagement ring–even if it is smaller and lesser quality. I’m a sucker for being traditional so I don’t feel like it was settling, even though he was budget conscious about his decision. In the end I would get the stone that you want within the budget you have. Down the line maybe you could get a moissanite or even another diamond but regardless I would see the engagement ring as a time capsule of the part of your life when you decided to marry your SO, in that it represents where you were then in life. It shouldn’t feel like settling; it should feel like getting the best within what you can afford at this stage of your life–whether that’s a diamond or a moissanite for you! 

 

Post # 36
Member
274 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2019

Even as a moissanite lover, your title made me want to comment and urge you NOT to get a moissy! Sounds like a diamond is your stone :). 

 

Unless you have a ton of money, we are all compromising somewhere. Cut, clarity, color, carat size..whether its even a diamond at all… the setting you want. For me, I wanted a perfect looking stone, in a size that suited my finger, no inclusions, and in a particular setting. I was willing to compromise on the center stone. But it sounds like it would bother you if it wasn’t’ a diamond, which means that should probably be a priority! You do you! Get a diamond if it’s what you truly want. 

Post # 37
Member
694 posts
Busy bee

manderson62 :  dang that ACC is making me want to make a right hand ring *drool* where’d you get it from?

Post # 38
Member
53 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: September 2019

Would I? Heck no. While I respect those that truly do love moissanite for what it is, I personally would not settle. I’ve always wanted Diamonds & I feel that although Mossys perform similarly* they are not & will never be or perform like a REAL Diamond. Deep down (I hope I dont get slayed for this) I feel Moissanite is just glorified CZ, nothing more or less. I think If I settled I’d have ring regret until I got what my heart truly wanted.

Post # 39
Member
128 posts
Blushing bee

I think your title says it all, if a moissy is “settling” in your opinion, DONT do it!!!!!!!!!!! You will waste alot of $$$$$$ on a diamond simulant while longing for the real thing

I would never spend that kind of money on something that wasnt the real deal, I personally could never wear a diamond look alike, if i couldnt have the diamond i wanted, i would have gone for a coloured gem which is obviously a choice I  had made…. whereas the moissy would just scream, oh she has a diamond simulant….couldnt do it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I absolutely love diamonds and was lucky enough to never have to settle , good luck deciding 

Post # 40
Member
1104 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2017

I knew I wanted a big rock. But I had no idea what a 2 carat diamond costed. Seeing the price different between a 2 carat diamond and a 2 carat equivalent moissanite might be tempting to some. They think they can get the look of a very expensive ring for much, much cheaper. However, they are completely different in person. If you want a diamond, you will be disappointed when you have a moissanite on your finger all day. They react differently to light and shine in a noticeably different way than a diamond. 

I agree with twofish :  they’re a glorified (and overpriced) CZ. And I believe that the only reason people buy them, deep down, is because they want a big diamond and can’t/don’t want to pay that much money for one. So they play it off as a diamond. 

 

ETA: I didn’t end up with a 2 carat ring because we didn’t want to spend over $20k. So we bought a 1.72 carat diamond

Post # 41
Member
558 posts
Busy bee

Get a diamond.. I am copying and pasting a conversation I had with someone yesterday because it’s relevant to this board.

Personally I believe there is nothing that can quite beat a diamond. People often justify buying moissys because Moissanite has a Mohs scale of Hardness of 9.25 and diamond has a 10. What they fail to realise is that the ‘hardness’ really means resistance to scratching and the Mohs scale is non-linear. Corundum (rubies) is a 9 on the Mohs scale but in reality a diamond is 5 times ‘harder’.

Have you heard of people’s moissanite rings getting a grey tinge or stain on them?

The rainbow oil slick stain that occurs with many moissanites occurs when silicon carbide (what moissanite is made out of) is exposed to air and oxidises to a thin layer of silicon dioxide. This CAN occur in conjunction with, and may be enhanced by the kind of adhesive used in the cutting process, or whatever they use to mount the setting. To quote wikipedia, the rainbow-like oil-slick stain is caused by a passivation layer of silicon dioxide that forms on the surface. Nevertheless it can also occur on its own.

At one point, I too was considering asking my Fiance for a moissanite. Because they are less expensive compared to equivalent natural diamond carat weights, they are conflict free, environmentally friendly, etc.

I ALMOST feel for the advertising but then, being a scientific researcher myself, I started digging into hard fast facts and the chemical structure, etc. What I discovered was very disappointing. I think I shouldn’t have to pay >$1000 for a synthetic gemstone that requires regular polishing and is more susceptible to scratching then a regular diamond.

 

Do other gemstones crack or get cloudy? Yes. Do some natural gemstones oxide? Absolutely. But it almost never happens with the same frequency as moissanite. 

I have heard of several people who have contacted Charles & Covard directly regarding this, and they were sent a cleaning cloth by C&C, and were recommended by them to  use a silver polish to clear the oil slick stains. And what does a silver polish do? It removes oxidation. Go figure.

As for the environmentally friendly spiel, most people with moissanite tend to have white-gold bands. These bands require regular rhodium plating and it’s terrible for the environment. So in all likelihood their ring isn’t environmentally friendly even if it’s a moissanite.

They don’t tell you all of this when you buy a moissanite do they?

 

I’m not trying to beat anyone down who has a moissy, if you love it, it’s yours and my opinions shouldn’t matter. Personally I wouldn’t ever buy a moissy for this and the reasons outlined above. 

Post # 42
Member
1328 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2005 - A Castle

Preface: I truly do not care what people wear on their wedding finger. I have a diamond, but it isn’t good quality and I don’t wear it anymore. For myself, I couldn’t get a moissanite for an engagement ring and my now-husband wouldn’t even hear of it back in the day. I almost pulled the trigger on a solitaire recently, but realized deep down I would always wish it were a diamond, so I canceled my order. I do think they’re really beautiful, but if I’m spending over a grand, I want it to be on a diamond. 

The flip side of that is that I’m in a place in life where spending a shit ton of money on my dream diamond is very low on my list of priorities. It’s definitely something I wish we would have gotten right in the beginning before kids and a home came into play. There’s just always going to be something more important to pay for than me getting a(nother) diamond. Maybe that’ll change in the future, but for now I’m content with just wearing my band as I look at all the lovely rings here. 

Post # 43
Member
9595 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2015

I would not get a sim, it would bug me. If the budget was small I would have gotten a vintage or 2nd hand diamond or gemstone ring, or maybe a modest halo ring.

Lots of people are thrilled with their moissys but they probably dont have it in their minds that theyre “settling”, so based on your wording I say go diamond. 

Post # 44
Member
290 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

Diamonds have no intrinsic value, they are not an investment purchase, and the prices are ridiculously inflated. All true. They are a luxury purchase all the way.

I’d rather have a diamond for my ER than any other stone, including simulants. Just my personal preference. I love their optics, longevity and the fact that they’re actually millions, if not a billion years old. I’d rather have a small, well cut diamond than a large anything. If our financial situation couldn’t allow for a diamond, I’d wait until it could. 

However, I don’t think people settle for Moissanite. People like them, their performance, their lower cost, etc. Many don’t want to support the diamond industry, which is totally valid. I’d love an old cut Moissanite for a stand in or RHR any day of the week. 

Post # 45
Member
1202 posts
Bumble bee

I think based on the fact that you’ll feel as though you would have settled says enough.  To me, that says that you’re only going with a moissanite because you want something affordable that appears to be a diamond and won’t raise questions while you’re out in public, which is not a good reason to get a moissanite.

When I first started dreaming about being someone’s wife one day, of course I imagined myself with a diamond. When I started doing research on diamonds and learned of how little they’re actually worth and that their popularity is solely based on the biggest scam ever played on the public, I didn’t want that at all so I started looking into simulants like expensive CZ and moissanite.

Eventually, I started thinking…if I didn’t want a diamond, why would I want something that’s going to pretend to be one? Just to fit in with everyone else?? That’s just NOT me and, from the tone of the sentiment being relayed in your original post, it doesn’t really seem like you either. 

After doing more research and giving myself an in-depth history lesson on what engagement rings really were before the diamond propaganda, I decided on a gemstone. I couldn’t be happier with my decision because it was a very educated one that was made as the result of years of research.  

I don’t think you should settle for something you don’t want.  I tink you should go to the store and try different things on and gather information on pricing.  You may fall in love with something you never even heard of before.  I had never heard of a Padparadascha Sapphire until like a week before purchasing my stone.  Do some research, make an educated decision, don’t settle.

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